There are worse ways to go. I was slowly dying away of bitterness. Ending it with a quick blow is nothing compared to the excruciating pain of having a bit of yourself dying every single day. Even last night, I was tempted to throw bleach into my mint tea. Only one thing keeps me going. Only one thing prevents me from ending this right now.
Originally posted by Evangelion
and whoa Val that’s scary.
yeah, it is. I doubt I could ever do it again, though. That was an… emotional time for me.
And Manus, don’t pull that “I was dying for eveery minute I was living” kinda crap. Besides, you didn’t put the bleach in the tea. You thought about it, sure, but you didn’t dare follow up on it.
Last night, because of personal problems, I felt an excruciating pain, as if my heart was being torn out of my chest. In that moment, I was very close. Only one thing made me stay my hand.
I’m feeling the same pain even now.
Nobody ask him what it is. It’d be funny 
And Manus, maybe professional help is the best way to go then, if you think it’s that serious.
Originally posted by Manus Dei
Last night, because of personal problems, I felt an excruciating pain, as if my heart was being torn out of my chest. In that moment, I was very close. Only one thing made me stay my hand.
I’m feeling the same pain even now.
No offense, but:
Boo. Fucking. Hoo.
Suck it the hell up and get over it.
I’ve been there, and you’re just fucking milking it for all it’s worth.
Yeah, get professional help. Stop whining about it to a bunch of people, most of whom probably don’t care (or it could be just me :P) and can’t help you.
And I’m going to get through this without any damn therapists or any damn medication. I’m going to pull myself together on my own.
And Steve… Your opinion is irrelevant. I don’t care about a single word you say.
Manus stop hinting at the obvious…we’ve all had those moments, those are normal, but rarely anyone follows up on it. Val you just painted the most gruesome picture into my head, I can’t think of anyone who would have the guts to do such a thing.
I think it’s safe to assume a vast majority of teenagers these days contemplates suicide but rarely any of them act upon it. If I were to, I’d do it in a kick and fairly painless way, the coward that I am. Not that it’s a number 1 thought of mine or anything.
And I’m going to get through this without any damn therapists or any damn medication. I’m going to pull myself together on my own.
I take it you never read my first reply Yes, seek some help, confiding in everyone here and then when someone burns you, saying you don’t care, will not get you anywheres.
Originally posted by Manus Dei
And I’m going to get through this without any damn therapists or any damn medication. I’m going to pull myself together on my own.
Well, I’m glad you came upon a decision. So much for this topic.
Originally posted by Steve
Manus. Suck it up.
You’re what, 15? Yeah, I was really depressed a lot when I was fifteen, but look at me now. I’ve not been depressed since the beginning of my sophomore year. Just suck it up, shut up, and go on.
<img src=“http://www.rpgclassics.com/staff/tenchimaru/td.gif”> Yeah, now he’s Little Mary Sunshine. And Manus, what stopped you? If thoughts like those cross your head again, you should really seek professional help.
Originally posted by Manus Dei
And Steve… Your opinion is irrelevant. I don’t care about a single word you say.
Stop that! Stop saying that people’s opinins are irrelivent! You’re calling ATTENTION to their opinion, which you don’t want. I looked at his post after you said that, and I might have accidentally skimmed over it otherwise. God. You have to learn.
Anyway- most everyone has thought about suicide- few have tried.
Beh, he decided, so there’s no real reason to continue this thread except to bicker.
Every time I go through something painful and difficult that’s beyond my control, I just hide my feelings and wait for better days.
Originally posted by Manus Dei
Every time I go through something painful and difficult that’s beyond my control, I just hide my feelings and wait for better days.
“Hide your feelings”? manus, hun, you’ll tell your sob stories to anyone who asks, unless you just want to act mysterious and angsty. I mean, look at how much you’ve told us about you.
Obviously that hasn’t worked, has it?
You know very little about me. Besides my apathy crisis, my difficulty in trusting people and my fic-writing style, all you have about me is nothing but a distorted image, made up by the things you want to see. And I was merely asking for advice. I don’t care about anything else.
Now, Val, if you do want to judge me, then wait until you actually know how I really am.
I’m not the kind to easily show how I really am, mind you. In fact, I try to hide it as much as possible. If you want to judge me, then you’ll have to gain my trust. Only then will you really know me.
<img src=“http://www.rpgclassics.com/staff/tenchimaru/td.gif”> <a href=“http://www.werewolves.org/~two/Rants/2rant-angst.mp3”>This</a> seems oddly appropiate.
(God, I love that guy’s rants. Careful, contains profanity. 2’s views do not neccesarily represent my own. Buy snacky cakes.)
Also, nobody CARES how you really are. Not like we’ll ever meet you in real life anyway, so the only thing that counts is how you act online. People will treat you according to how you act online, not how you supposedly act offline. I personally don’t care if you’re a frickin’ moviestar or whatever, if you act like an idiot, you get treated like an idiot.
What is the point of this thread now?
That as got to be one of the wierdest rants, I think I have ever heard. And believe me, I have heard a lot of rants, from my friends, to compare it to!
Anyway Manus, just forget about whatever is nugging you! And then take a minute to relax, and try to take a look at things from a new angle. If you do that maybe things will look better!
Originally posted by Cless Alvein
What is the point of this thread now?
<img src=“http://www.rpgclassics.com/staff/tenchimaru/td.gif”> There is no point. There is only venom.