I hate...

My fucking roommate. Let me start from the top:

The current living situation is this- Myself, Alex, and Benson. Benson is the problem currently as I’m about to explain.

When Benson moved in, he was sleeping on our couch and in exchange, gave us rides to places in his car. Things have changed a bit since then, first and foremost is the fact that he and I now share a room. He has nearly stopped giving anyone in the appartment a ride in the last year (he’s been with us for 2).

The other day, Alex, Benson, myself and my girlfriend were going to a festival togather called the “Cherry Blossom Festival” in seattle (Japanese cultural faire). As we were putting our shoes on and getting ready to head out the door Benson turns a 180 on us and decides that he doesnt want to go. Its really shitty of him at this point because he KNEW we had been planning on this for a week and he had agreed to go with us, thus supplying a ride.

We move on though, In the past, things like this have happened alot. At one point he started dissappearing from the house for days on end and would come home, not say a word, go get some clothes and take off again.

Frankly, this was the best of times.

He has a way of annoying you with somthing small. Anything in excess is annoying though, I’d suppose. He will be sitting there at his desk making Preditor noises for like 5 minutes. Singing the power rangers theme song every time he comes in the door unknown to himself that he lacks any atom of what could be described as a singing voice.

He waists money because his parents support him. He saw my PSP when I got it and decided that he wanted one. Well, he got one but he didnt and still hasnt bought a single game for it. Nor has he really touched it. Which leads me to a bigger waist-

He traded his roomy 4 door car in for a 2 seater standard peice of shit car because it was the same frame as some car in an Anime. He’s yet to do any modifying on it like he claimed he would when he bought it over 8 months ago.

I helped him get a job at gamestop and he got fired within the first month for insubbordination.

He abuses our cat (Arthas) by holding him down and poking him in the belly or pinching his ears untill he claws him. Once Arthas fights back, Benson proceeds to hold him under the shower and scream “No” at him for a few minutes like the CAT was to blame.

Everything else is rather low on importance but just add to the fact that myself and Alex simply do not like him as a person any more:

~Closeted furry
~Obsessed with halo (like… no, you can’t even begin to imagine. Take my cammy thing and make it 10fold. Yeah, its bad)
~Creepy - Beastiality porn on his comuter. We found it by accident when looking for his “Kazaa” folder.
~Really Pissing me off - My girlfriend was over this weekend and he kept staring at her. She felt uncomfortable.

Good news, he may be moving. Maybe. Hopefully. Please dear god, let it be so.

We all have our faults, this is true. But the simple fact is that we can’t stand him any more. And hes rude to boot.

OOOH MAN, I forgot the worst thing though. He hacks up phlegm in the back of his throat and swollows it. Thus making the most disgusting sound known to man kind. (this happens about once per hour)

That’s absolutely gross… X_x I hope you’ll get rid of that jerk soon.

Kill! :mwahaha:

No seriously, that sucks.

The difference here is that someone will actually be reading his rant! :hahaha;

Izlude, hang in there bud. If he’s moving then that’s a good thing, if not then you need to concoct… a CUNNING PLAN!

Blackadder anyone? No? Awww.

Easy solution.

  1. Get him drunk…VERY drunk
  2. Drive to the border
  3. Pick up a hooker
  4. Go to 24 hour chapel
  5. Have him marry the hooker
  6. Videotape the entire wedding
  7. Send videotape to his parents

His parents will be so disappointed with him that they’ll cut him off, forcing him to move out.

Does he chip in money for rent or utilities?

If not, then kick the mofo out.

Next time he goes away for a couple days, have the locks changed. He’ll come back and figure out that hey, his key doesn’t work no more. And the rest will eventually dawn on him.

Mengde: only if you’ve got a plan as cunning as a fox that has been named Professor of Cunning at Oxford University.

Yeah, initially he wasnt paying rent, but now he is and is also on the lease… Its a messy situation we’ve got our selves in.

Is the cat okay?

Is Benson black?

I have a better idea:

  1. Get him drunk…VERY drunk
  2. Drive across the border
  3. Take his wallet and slap a shirt on him with “MEXICANS SUCK” printed on it in big red letters
  4. Leave him for dead in a dark alley somewhere

I guarantee you wouldn’t have to deal with him ever again, one way or another. (trust me, my father is Mexican…he goes apeshit anytime someone just says something like that.) ^.^

Place a kilo of cocaine in his room along with a half burned American flag, a copy of the Quran, some PVC pipes filled with gunpowder, and a dart board with some pictures of the president and several senators pinned on with darts. Then call homeland security and send me $50 since I gave you this awesome plan

Bastard. Mistreating a cat. Ship him to Norway; I’m short on bloodwine.

What a tosser, that with the cat is seiously nasty though.
I suggest putting rice in his bed, and slipping him a few sleeping pills whenever your girlfriend comes over.

Rice? O_o Why not razor blades?

Good point, didn’t think of that.

You’re my very good friend TD.

In all seriousness (not that I don’t agree with TD), just get him thrown off the lease. Which I assume he is, because it’d be illegal if he wasn’t. Just throw his ass out, quit pussyfooting around the issue if you’re that upset about it.

You’re his roomate not his mom, he doesn’t neet to keep you informed of his wherabouts.

Have you tried talking to him about this?

What business is this of yours?

What business is this of yours?

Oh noz, the job didn’t work out, if he’s paying rent then it’s no big deal.

Have you tried talking to him about this?

If he’s closeted then that means he keeps it to himself and doesn’t bother you with it.


So you were snooping through his computer? Asshole.

Have you tried talking to him about this hurrrr

Have you talked to him about this? Like actually talked to him and told him it bothers you?

You hate too many things. You should watch an episode of the carebears.

Maybe you should go on a diet!