Help zeppelin: Chinese Internet Dating

Out of a mix of sheer curiosity and boredom at work, I made a web profile at, one of the largest Chinese internet portals. QQ is also a Chinese instant messaging program that started as basically just a Chinese clone of ICQ but has expanded into the largest Chinese social networking tool available. There are nearly 100 million unique Chinese QQ users, which makes it one of the largest instant messaging / social networking programs in the world. Of course, it is all in Chinese, so there are very few non-Chinese actually using it. The hypothesis then became: If I, as a white male with light hair and blue eyes, made a QQ profile entirely in Chinese, how many girls could I get to send me a message?

The answer is: a lot. I’ve decided to extend the experiment one step further. I am going to choose one of them to go on a date with and see what happens. I have never gone on an “internet date” before - however, internet dating is a totally accepted and commonplace thing here in China. There is no shame associated with it like we might have back in the US (though I’ve heard this stigma is slowly dying away). There are far fewer venues for Chinese people to meet each other than we enjoy, so the Internet has become one of the most improtant ways young people meet each other and date.

I have chosen six girls that messaged me. Your job, citizens of rpgclassics, is to help me decide which one I should date, and I will write up a final report / description of the event after it is over. I will also take some questions from you that you want me to ask her, and report back on her answers after the date. I have chatted with each of these six girls for a few minutes on QQ using a webcam to verify they are all who they say they are, and that they reasonably resemble their pictures. Here are the six candidates:

Girl number 1:

I don’t really know too much about girl number 1. She is originally from Shanghai (where I live now), and she is a very attractive girl. She is 22 years old. She seems to spend most of her time at the Internet cafe, which means she is probably lower down on the socioeconomic order (doesn’t have her own computer). She came off as a bit dirty to me, so there is a reasonable chance I could…well, take her for a test drive on the first date, if you’ll allow me to be so blunt.

[STRIKE]Girl number 2:[/STRIKE]

[STRIKE]Girl number 2 is a very fashionable and attractive young girl. She is nineteen years old and originally from Shanghai. She seems to love taking pictures in McDonald’s, which is her favorite restaurant (this is not uncommon here - a date at McDonald’s is a completely legitimate date. It’s a rather upscale type thing with young people). She still lives with her parents (read: virgin). She collects handbags…which means I’d probably have to take her shopping on the date (not my favorite activity). She is very cute though, and has a very soft voice. If I buy her stuff, I could probably get some kissing action in.[/STRIKE]

[STRIKE]Girl number 3:[/STRIKE]

[STRIKE]Girl number 3 is a true “peasant girl” Her family comes from a small farming village in the country side of China. She is a very, very pretty girl however, and in Chinese they have an idiom to describe her as: 小家碧玉 (xiao jia bi yu), which transaltes as "a beautiful girl of humble birth). She studies at a university in Shanghai. She supposedly studies English, but her English does not seem that good. I have a feeling she is only really studying to try and find a husband, as most girls from her background would do. She is 21 years old. There is no way that a date with her would result in any form of physical contact, except perhaps a hug at the end. However, I have never been on a date with a countryside girl before, so it would be itneresting.[/STRIKE]

Girl number 4:

I was originally not going to include girl number 4, because honestly, I don’t find her that physically attractive. What can I say? I’m shallow. After having a conversation with her, however, I concluded I’d put her in the running, because she has a very strong and interesting personality, and we had a very interesting conversation about Chinese culture. She speaks nearly fluent English, and she is currently studying for her master’s in translation and interpretation. She is 23 years old, making her the oldest among the candidates. She might be a bit too excited about the possibility of dating a white guy though. She seemed to be rather forward. Date could potentially result in disaster.

Girl number 5:

Girl number 5 would fulfil one of my fantasies: a date with a Chinese secretary (and she even looks like a secretary too). I’ve got a weakness for girls with glasses, I must admit. Girl number 5, like girl number 3, is a girl of rather humble birth. She is a big girl, however…almost the same height as me, which is quite abnormal for a Chinese girl (most of the other girls are all around 5 feet to feet 3 inches tall). I’ve never had a date with a Chinese girl of such stature before, which could be interesting. Girl number 5 is 22 years old, and she seems to have a dreadful taste in fashion. As you can see, her shirt proudly declares “cute girl”. I kind of like the whole clueless Chinese fashion thing though.

[STRIKE]Girl number 6:[/STRIKE]

Girl number 6 is the youngest girl of the bunch, clocking in at only 18 years old. She has just graduated high school, and will be soon moving on to study art here in Shanghai. She is a very artistic minded person. In our webcam conversation, she showed me some of the artwork and photography she has done. It wasn’t great, but for a young girl with no training, it wasn’t bad. It can be difficult to find girls here that have hobbies other than looking for husbands and shopping, so it was quite nice. She talked about how some of her other friends all have “foreign boyfriends”, so I think she’s feeling a bit behind the curve, and would merely be using me to show off that she’s cool too. I have no problems with this, as long as I get the um…requisite payback for such services.[/STRIKE]

So there you have it rpgclassics. Who would you choose? Please explain your decisions, as it will help me greatly in the decision process.

If it were me, I’d choose #4. She’s educated, pretty, and at a good age. Seriously? Eighteen? I’d feel weird dating a twenty year old, and I’m twenty four. <_<;

But yeah, I guess we judge attractiveness on different critera.

#5 is attractive, too. I’d definitely date her.

Girl #2 might not be a virgin just because she lives with her parents…

…so I’d pick #2 to just see if you really do break the cherry and don’t find out you were wrong and dating a golf hole



Six likes trix.
Five is jive.
Four is a whore.
Three hugs trees.
Two is a whore, too.
One is the one.

Go with #1.

Here a couple more pics of girl 4, who seems to be popular in the chat. The first one is the original, which I cropped, because she used some crazy QQ cutesey image template. The second is just another pic

The various little physical compliments make me think you should take 5. She fulfills a fantasy, she has glasses, and you like the dreadful Chinese fashion thing going on. She’s not some monstrous 6 foot tall female, so you don’t have that turn off. She doesn’t have the M.R.S. Degree vibe that #3 had, but I imagine the hugging at the end is still the only result because she’s from the country side.

Also, her picture just seems the most normal by Western standards. One, three, and six are your standard camwhore photographs. Two looks like a bitch. Four just seems weird.

Can you copypasta their Chinese QQ profiles here entirely for my benefit?

edit: and possibly Sun’s

Hard to choose. As far as I can tell #2 doesn’t look all that attractive to me, #3 seems to be the best looking of the lot, #4 seems like a nerd which is a good thing in my book (better looking than any female nerd I know), I’m worried about that child in pic #5, and I wouldn’t go any further than a one-night stand with #6 (she’s way too young and probably has no idea what she wants, and should she figure it out she’ll probably want to have nothing to do with you).

As for the first picture I can’t gather any relevant information out of it other than she’s not a troll (appearance wise at least).

If I were making the choice for myself I’d go with four, but I wouldn’t rule three out just yet (at least until I knew more about her).

@Klez: Isn’t Sun a male though?

He means for his and Sun’s benefit, since they can read Chinese.

Where are their breasts?

I second #5. Reading the bios you wrote, it just seems like you’ve already made up your mind on her.

Second choice of #2 just because she looks next the closest to normal (by western standard) based on the picture and information provided.

And shittily mine.

For now, though, #1, #4 or #5. Personally, I say that it’s all about mysterious girls with carefully tousled hair. You seem the most enthusiastic about #5, and I’d say go with your gut, on the other hand. Also, I have a weakness for tall girls and poor senses of fashion, so I can understand. #4 seems to have an interesting personality, which is pretty important, even if you are shallow, since dates involve spending time with people, not pictures, whether you want them to or not. I’d still vote mysterious internet cafe girl, though.

Since you say you’re doing this “just to see what happens,” I’d probably go with #1. If that was a lie and you’re actually looking for something serious, I’d probably go with #5. You don’t sound very enthused about ANY of them though. This seems like a big “if I HAD to” scenario, in which case I’d give the unconventional advice of backing off. Maybe that’s weak advice, but this is one area where I just think toying with people makes you a pretty massive douche.

Clearly #4 or #5.

1 vs 4. The rest don’t seem as interesting.

It depends on what you want. I’m not sure what you want to get out of this. If you’re just looking to take a girl out on a test drive, 1 seems like a sure bet. Aside from #2, its not clear if the others will be as compliant. Wear protection.

4 seems to be the one that is most interesting to spend any amount of time with and while she’s not spectacular, she isn’t bad either. If you’re not only looking for a cheap lay and actually want to be able to have a decent conversation with someone, she’s at the top of the list, while still being likely to put out, unlike others. Its unfortunate she’s not the prettiest of the bunch, but I’d at least keep her around because she looks to be the only one with the potential to be someone I genuinely like. If I were to pick one to keep as a girlfriend based on the little info you’ve given us, this would be the one.

I personally have no problem in banging and leaving bitches, but I prefer to not do that to the nice girls.

I have a vivid dislike for the shallow materialism displayed by handbag girl and the husband farmers don’t seem like a safe route unless you’re just looking for a cardboard wife (which I doubt you are). While I agree glasses can be cute, I can’t stand the ridiculous American Apparel style. People as shallow as handbag girl are nevertheless easier to manipulate so she could be a substitute for #1 if you can stand her. Edit: just came to a realization that if its near impossible to communicate with people this shallow, it eliminates the major obstacles. This doesn’t apply as much since you do speak Chinese. Re-edit: I’m not sure if 1 is really cuter than 2. I’d have to see pictures of both. But still, urgh, handbags. I guess 1 wins over 2 simply because I don’t know enough about 1 to dislike her more than 2. I have a natural aversion to irrational artsy people, mostly because the ones I have met have tended to be so fucking stupid.

I think Killmore brings a very important point of discussion: age/maturity. I agree with him that the young ones are the least stable and highest risk for any kind of medium to long term relationship. They’re also the least likely to hold their own in a conversation because of lack of experience and I would expect less likely to be good in the sac. The only advantage to how young some of them are is if you like the simple fact that they are young and barely legal.

Girl 1 or 4.

You mentioned #1 sounding a bit dirty so maybe you could get her to wear glasses during the test drive and get two brids with one stone.

#4 sounds interesting. She speaks nearly fluent English, and is doing her Masters in language and translation, so she’s likely educated in other languages as well. Even if you don’t know any other languages, the conversation you’d have should be interesting. If she’s as forward as you’re implying she may be looking to bag a white guy to make up for all those years studying.

She wears glasses too, and they’re much better than the ones girl #5 has.

I agree with Sin on handbag girl. Even you admitted that you’d only get kissing action if you bought her stuff.

Not very original responses from my part.

In my case, as cute or hot as a girl may be, if I can’t have a fun chat with her because she’s immature or stupid, my brain wins the tug-o-war against my dick with ease and orders me to quit.

So from the list, I’d go for #4 as most everyone else. I personally think she’s cute enough.

The husband hunting quite honestly creeps the shit out of me.

If you’re just looking to put it in though, try #1.

Bullet Form:

1- Visually appealing but lacking in depth, one night stand at best.
2- I loathe shopping as a hobby, too young.
3- Husband Hunters make poor dates. Acceptable friends, but I don’t think you give two fucks about friendships in this endeavor.
4- Acceptable candidate, not as pretty as others but seems to be able to hold her own in a conversation given your description. Worth giving a chance.
5- Also acceptable candidate, should be wary that she is similar to #3 in her goal. If anything worth trying to see what horror she’d wear on date.
6- Wants a trophy foreign boyfriend. See #1.

Ask whoever you date how they feel regarding the death of the President of Gabon and how they foresee the social and economic effects of this political turmoil on the short and long term.

I would choose number four, because she speaks English pretty well and her higher education might mean that you’d have more things to talk about. Also, she’s a little older. You’re a little older to date an eighteen year old, aren’t you zeppelin? thought you were like 26.
I think number four is pretty, also.

LOL (it’s not even funny, but so true).

I’d say #4 as well. You already got good advice as to why. It all depends what you’re looking for, of course, but from your very brief descriptions, they sound pretty much like they’re all the same except 4.

#4 and #5 seem pretty well to get to know better.

But I will say this.

#1 is a Space Alien. She’ll fuck your shit up.
#2 is older than you and the most powerful being in the universe.
#3 hates #1 is a soul-burning passion, probably because #1 shot her spaceship down and stranded her on your planet. She is also #2’s older sister.
#4 is a Mad Scientist and at the end of the night will be sticking things in YOU.
#5 is a Space Officer and doesn’t get out much.
#6 will probably wreck your bike by touching it, also good friends with #5.

Good Luck, “Tenchi.”