Gila Monster arrived in America as an emissary from Canada to the great land of the USA. I learned a little bit about his backward country, as a result:

  1. Their ultimate goal in life is to attempt to steal seafood from innocents.

  2. They use their politeness powers to distract people from their sinister goals.

  3. They complain about our dollar bills, even though the founding father George Washington himself is on them! Probably because they don’t have the Queen on them.

  4. Canadians are really, really funny looking. Like they aren’t even people!

  5. This is because, in fact, Canadians are classified as bugs, taxonomically speaking.

This is the Canadian Way.

Have you heard the latest news from Canada? It seems that deep within the forest, there is trouble with the trees. The Maples seem to desire more light, however, the politically more powerful oaks are ignoring their pleas.

Holy shit, now we know the truth! :open_mouth:

I, for one, welcome our new [STRIKE]Canadian[/STRIKE] insect overlords.

What is this “Canada” you speak of? Is it part of the USA? :hahaha;

I’ve heard (someone can beat him in under 17 seconds) that he’s a scarily accurate depiction of a maple leaf suryp-guzzling lumberjacking bear hugging canadian from Salmon Arm, British Columbia.

It’s true. I was on a government surveillance mission to America. While Ken did learn a little about my own customs, I learnt a bit more about the American way. Such is that bigger is better, make sure you do anything to get to the top, and of course mention the phrase telephone pole every five minutes.

Here is photographical evidence of this meeting:

And here you can see us with another Canadian brethren, assisting me in government policy.

Wait. Canada invaded!?


I should’ve known better than to take a five day break from my constant vigil over the northern frontier to gawk at mother nature’s colossal ass crack. >.<

Not like people would notice if Canada invaded. All the best entertainers are Canadian already anyway.

I made a comeback to that before you even said it.

They’re just bored without William Shatner, Ryan Reynolds, Jim Carrey, Leslie Nielson, Dan Aykroyd and many other entertainers attending the great sap harvest.

All they have left are

fat men kicking bears asses at ice hockey and

chugging maple syrup.

That better not be a Gay Bear. :gaybear:

OMG Gay Bear icon. No way!

wow, GAP is going bald pretty quickly

Gila- You also learned that Mary-land crab cakes aren’t free! :open_mouth:

Zep- Don’t you think I know that? :stuck_out_tongue:

Hahaha oh man. I totally didn’t mean to do that. I’m so used to paying for food before I get it, unless its Subway or something. That must of looked pretty bad on my part.

canada is for assholes

Go to Canada and tell them to take Nickelback and Celine Dion back, kthnxbai

Nope, we deported them for a reason. :wink:

We don’t want them anymore than you do!

Heh, nice pics. asl?