Online Life: The Online Comic: The Movie

Who should play who if OL were to become a super american hollywood movie?

Vin Diesel as Macc Maverick,
Tom Hanks as Merlin,
Winona Ryder as Faetan,
Robert De Niro as Lunaris,
Hugh Jackman as Sinistral,
Hilary Duff as Zero,
…and featuring Ben Affleck as SPOONYBARD in…

explosions in background

I think keanu Reves (sp?) should play spoony, then we could get more bad acting, and he could be all neoy!