I find it strange that I am in a near-identical situation at my school.
The same kinds of idiots are there too, and I know why I’m mostly a loner: I like to form my own opinions. I do not simply go with what everyone else thinks is cool.
Originally posted by Lord Zhou Yu
I think everyone is, at one point or another…
Thank Christ I’m in college. Everything gets better after you leave high school. Trust me on that.
My friends ditched me. Totally excommunicated me. My friends suck more then your friends! Nyah nyi nyah nyi nyah nyah! Literally everyone in my school are idiots in some way or another, I just get the least idiotic friends myself. I swear, if I here the word ‘Faggot’ again, i’m going to be forced to kick someone’s ass. That word is so fucking annoying.
I don’t even bother with friends at school anymore.
The library is my sanctuary.
Originally posted by Evangelion
people like to walk on me and see me as odd and that I’m easy to take advantage of.
I have that problem too. Most of the people I knew in high school didn’t consider me a friend, but thought I considered them one. They tried to manipulate me because of it. What I always did was make them think I was going on with what they wanted, but secretly screwed them over in the end. Only the most intelligent of them learned (3), but it was fun watching how badly they messed up in the end.
Most of my school friends are also quite immature and have taken a liking to cracking penis and sexual jokes which annoy the hell out of me. I don’t find the word “vagina” or “penis” funny anymore. Do you guys?
Anymore wouldn’t be the right word for me. More like never. It seemed really weird the first time I heard someone call someone else a penis. Now it just seems like a bad attempt to call someone a dickhead and sound intelligent.
You get branded as a loner here if you’re seen with no other people a lot,
Band together with other loners and knock those othe jerks off the social ladder MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Or find some intelligent people to hang around.
hanging around really childish friends who sit in the hallways everyday watching them play numerous rounds of Asshole (or dry humping with their sig. others against the lockers)
I am not curious enough to even ask. So please don’t explain
Originally posted by Evangelion
… I’d rather look like a loner than humiliate myself with a bunch of kids who are extremely sexually frustrated and who need to grow up.
Sounds like a solution to me.
I’ve never had “friends” like you talk about, but I’ve seen other people who act like that to each other. Unless you’ve got a good reason (few people do), ditch them and find friends who actually care. You don’t even need to give them a reason, although it would go that much farther in showing that you are better. Unless you start rubbing it in; an attitude of superiority attitude won’t help you any.
Originally posted by Manus Dei
Having morals isn’t easy these days…
Yup. You know what they say, nice guys finish last. Then again, it feels good to hear that you’ve partially restored someone’s faith in men when you turn down their very explicit advances.
Originally posted by Manus Dei
Having morals isn’t easy these days…
Yes it is. Everyone has morals.
Not everyone conforms to what your idea of moral is, however.
Don’t like your friends? Walking all over you? Forget about them. Look around yourself and find people that are more like you- ones that don’t want to use you as a doormat. Either that, or confront them. Right now you’re just letting them use you, and you can’t do that. You must take the path that is best in your self-interest to be happiest.
Having morals and then following them is different than doing what you want and making your morals fit your actions.
if you want to be techical, if someone “has morals but doesnt follow them” i propose that the person has a completely different set of morals and merely claims to hold the other set for social gain.
Yes, secondary school is or has been a torturous experience for many, including myself; I suffered terribly since I remained on the lowest social caste during those years, and found myself the recipient of verbal harassment from my peers of higher social caste (fortunately, I was never physically harassed).
My solution was to involve myself in social circles outside of school, and primarily with persons who were from one to five years older than I was. I joined a live action role-playing group, insinuated myself very well and subsequently made many friends (I later met my first girlfriend through that group as well), by virtue of not only common interests, but also congruent disgust and anger at the immature but popular persons whom we (had) loathed in secondary school. Although I later deviated from that circle as my interests grew more refined, I cannot deny that at the time it offered reprieve and encouragement.
Inasmuch I continued to dislike the immaturity in secondary school, it did have one positive effect on me in the end: it elicited my chivalric aspirations and my code of ethics. I strove to deviate from those whom I disliked, ever more adamantly, upon beholding the apogee of their insolence during the latter years of secondary school, when consumption of spirits and experimentation with sexual acts grew more common amongst my peers.
Friends like that aren’t friends. If those are the only friends you can make, I advise to look at alternatives. Show some backbone, suck it in and get rid of that which ails you.
I never said they weren’t the only friends I could make, I’m just reluctant to do so considering my position. Yes I may be a little whiney but it comes down to having more than backbone…
You’ll be hard-pressed to find any level of maturity in high school. Most of the people are either a. like you said, with absolutely no tact or decency at all, or b. believing themselves to be the end-all of maturity, and lording their moral high ground over those who don’t.
Both suck. The trick, though, to not wanting to kill them every time you hang out with either of them, is to treat the interaction as kind of a joke, and as such not to judge it or them so harshly or seriously (but at the same time, not to be afraid to make fun of them for your own benefit). See…here’s what I do.
Okay, so there are a bunch of kids who think sexual humor is really funny, and they’re standing around me. My position is, I smile half-sarcastically and shake my head, but say nothing, just look amused. That way I establish myself as above this shit, really awesome, BUT AT THE SAME TIME they don’t tell me to fuck off, and I don’t lose the fun of the joke of interaction. Because, let’s face it, sometimes being alone and just feeling sorry for yourself, well, sucks.
It’s all about using those so-called “friends” for your own amusement and ego boosting, and in that sense it’s extremely machiavellian I know. But let’s face it, they’re not worth anything else. If you’re lucky enough to find people in high school you can truly connect with, you’ll know them, and of course you’ll give your life and love for them as they would for you, because that’s what true friends do - but those people are few and very far between, especially in high school.
-Mazrim Taim
Maz I am worshipping you. I kind of do that already, stand around and look amused but I’m really not. So I got dubbed “the sane one” or “the mature one” and honestly, if people are stupid enough to start naming people stuff like that it should be a wake up call. But whatever, some people find it difficult to see how much of dumbass they act like.
So judging from the majority of replies I’m getting, this kind of thing is normal with everyone? I just thought it might be my area, or my school because my super city seems to be well known for its ego and immaturity when it comes to adolescants.
Yeah, people naming you stuff like that is hilarious because it’s so stupid, just like everything else they seem to do. I guess the trick is to actually be amused, but at different stuff than they think you are. And well, at my school it’s actually pretty awesome, I have more than my fair share of real friends, but my grade doesn’t have the typical social dynamic that most high schools do (rather than “castes” of social order, it’s more like there are “groups” of friends, which don’t really openly judge one another, the football players are content to fuck their platinum blonde cheerleader girlfriends; they don’t try to make fun of others - I like to think it’s because there’s such a high percentage of intelligent badasses who could totally just through words and body language make even a huge football player feel like a complete idiot, even in front of his friends, that there isn’t any sort of conflict).
But from what I’ve encountered in my years on the internet and my memories of grade school shudder, yeah, your situation is pretty normal. Most teenagers are really, really dumb. It’s a cause of the sorry state of the western world, because those stupid teenagers grow up to be stupid adults. The go to college, and…well like in the dead kennedys song:
no i’m not here to LEARN!
i just want to get DRUNK!
and major in BUSINESS!
and be taught how to FUCK! WHOO!
WIN! WIN! I always play to win!
Wanna fit in like a cog
in a faceless machine!
i’m a terminal (terminal) terminal preppie!
terminal (terminal) terminal preppie!
…
–“terminal preppie,” dead kennedys
So like, yeah. It’s normal, and it’s going to be normal the rest of your life - the difference is, in college and in the real world, you don’t have to spend as much time around that kind of dumbass as you do in high school.
-Mazrim Taim
Originally posted by Mazrim Taim
You’ll be hard-pressed to find any level of maturity in high school. Most of the people are either a. like you said, with absolutely no tact or decency at all, or b. believing themselves to be the end-all of maturity, and lording their moral high ground over those who don’t.
I couldn’t find any b’s when I was in high school. I would prefer at least a few of those over a school population of only a’s.
Believe me, you wouldn’t. It might be cool at first, but they’re SUCH dicks. They’re just as immoral and stupid, and in a way even worse, since they’re also hypocrites. They’re basically a group of people who were made fun of by the "a"s, so they come together and dish out the same sort of contempt…worse because they’re good at making you think that they actually ARE better than you, since they do it so…civilly. Which is completely untrue. They’re just another group of bullies, albeit academic ones.
-Mazrim Taim
I think it would be better to fight against two small groups who are enemies, rather than one large group.
I second this threat… 100%
People just dont understand other people… they dont bother about getting to know them…
(warning, story that might sound pretty silly underneath this)
like… I went to this party and I sat and chatted with one of my friends (good ones exist too, not too many though), then suddenly this girl came over and kissed me on the cheek and walked away… I have no girlfriend, but I am one of the people who are too socially fXcked up to actually think that a kiss is a pretty intimate thing… why am I even writing this? … anyway! as I said before, I second this thread