my fanfic

hi all! this is my first part of my first fanfic! hahaha… i tried to send it to weilia but i dunno if it got through so i am just gonna put it here… good thig then is i can get everyone elses opinions too… remember thought, this is the first part, it is ff8, and yeah. first part… :hahaha; :mwahaha:

Phillip W. Randt

Caring for one another in essence is true living. Obsession is however the pit and soul of evil.

‘She sat by the tree underneath the shade. Ahh, how beautiful. Her long black hair strung about her shoulders and chest. Her eyes, her lips, everything. Beautiful. Too bad really. *sigh* I’d really hate to do this. But I must. She IS mine! And no one else will ever have her...’

It was a sunny Saturday afternoon. About two months after the time compressed nightmare. Perfect for, hell, just about anything! Leaves scattered about the hallways to the dorms in the mid-fall light, and a cool breeze blew through from the east. There stood Squall, breathing in a big breath of fresh air.

“Damn, never thought I would see another great day like this...”  thought Squall. Past memories of what happened only months ago flooded back. “No. I can let this ruin it. It’s all in the past. Phew!” Only the voice of one he knew so well broke his concentration.

“Gezz Squall. Guess I could of found you alone. Ha!” exclaimed the ever so energetic Zell.

“Man, can’t you ever get a girlfriend and quit bugging me.” said Squall with a hint of sarcasm in his voice.

“Well, for your information I think I do! Her name was... um... Wait a sec...”

“The girl who works in the library Zell...”

“Oh yeah!” Zell shouted, “I knew I’d remember it!” and off with a flash he was gone.

“Haha... Good old’ Zell...” Squall could see now that he’d never would get anywhere if he just sat here. Especially with so much to do. If anything could get in the way of such a great day it was work.

After Ultimetica’s defeat, Squall and everyone returned to Balamb Garden only for a few days of relaxation and admiration. Then Irvine and Selphie went to Trabia Garden to help with the reconstruction. Of course with Selphie out in front giving the orders and Irvine closely following behind. Quistis began teaching once again and had her own ‘enlarged’  group of Trepes. Zell was awarded the position of monitoring security of the Garden which he thought to be the greatest thing. Of course Zell would accept anything if it meant he got more attention. While Rinoa, who was never a SeeD to begin with, started her classes to become one. Life was back on track and everything was moving slowly again. Except the fact Squall is now a Garden Commander. Three days after they returned, Cid asked Squall if he would like to be the new commander. He believed Squall was right for the job even though he was still young. This was after much complaining. But Cid argued a very strong point. Everyone looked up to Squall, admired him, and even idolized him to the point it was scary. Squall had made sure to note most of the people who would let alone rip him to shreds with unending question after question. Squall had no choice. He was backed into a corner. So he took the job. Well... Almost everything was back on track...

Squall was walking down the hallway, past the newly added part of the dorms, to his own personal room. As he entered, he realized he wasn’t alone.

“Hiya Squall!” Rinoa eagerly said. “I was looking for you. When are you going to pick me up?”

“What?” came Squall’s blank reply.

“You promised me and now you don’t know!?!” her voice now rising.

“Oh. Huh? What did I promise to do this time?” Squall thought for a moment.

“Remember? You’d said you’d take me out tonight.” Rinoa said with that special tone of hers she reserves just for Squall.

“Oh Sh--!” Squall exclaimed under his breath. He recognized that tone. He just hoped she would forgive him. “I-I’m sorry Rinoa. But, I can’t tonight. Too much to do. I am real-” But that was all he was able to get out before Rinoa turned strait for the door and walked out in a rage. 

“Damnit!” thought Squall.... “Why the hell do I have to do this anyway?” And he walked out after her.

He watched as Rinoa hurried away as a frantic Squall gave chase. “Ha...” he said to himself. “Never learns does he...” And he turned away and walked off.

	Selphie sat in the front seat of Ragnarok with a panicked Irvine next to her. “S-S-Stop the ship now!” he screamed.

	“Tra la la...” It was to late. Selphie flipped the Ragnarok upside down and did a 360 turn throwing Irvine back in his seat. ”Whooooo-hoooooo!”

	“Please, Selphie stop... I think I’m gonna be sick... Ugh...”

	“I don’t see what the problem is Irvi-poo. Just a little fun flying.” declared Selphie as she again spun in a complete circle.

	“Could you just stop and go Balamb Garden already!?!” Irvine couldn’t hold it anymore and unbuckled his seat and ran off.

	“Hmm... Maybe I should have listened...” thought Selphie... “Well too late to think about it now.” 

	Irvine slowly reentered the main deck and took his seat again. “You know you can’t keep doing this to me. In any vehicle you and I are in I get sick!”

	“Aww come on now. I don’t do that all the time.”

	“Naw I guess not.... Just 99% of the time... Haha...”

	“Well... Just for that...................”

Quistis sat at her desk , many papers skewed about, trying to find her grade sheet. “Where is it?!? I had it right here before. ‘Maybe I should get a folder.’ Ahh where is it!”

Just as she was about to check under her desk, Squall came barging in the room. “Have you seen Rinoa? She gave me the slip.”

“Uh, no I haven’t Squall. How nice to see-”

“Oh okay thanks,” and off Squall went.

*sigh* “I should just admit it. Never will it ever work. I mean really. I just cannot compete with her. I just don’t understand. Lately I’ve felt more lonely then ever before. But why?” Quistis sat back in her chair and started to laugh at herself. “Listen to me. Prating on with such frivolous matters. I have more important matters to attend to.” She began once again looking for her grading sheet. 


	“But what Zell... You seem to forget me pretty easily don’t you. You know I wonder why I ever bothered with you. You’d always forget me, leave me with nothing to do on the night we are to go out.”

	“But I can explain!”

	“I frankly don’t care. This is over. Us, me, you, over got it?” the girl stormed away from Zell.

	“Aww damnit!” shouted Zell as he punched at the bookcase next to him almost knocking it over completely. He sat there thinking for a bit then decided to burn off some steam elsewhere. The training center sounded good. But before he ever got there someone stepped out in front of him, blocking the way into the training center. Zell saw the man’s face and a surprised look came upon his own. “What the...”

	“Hi there Zell. How ya been?” and with saying that, he struck Zell over the head, knocking him out. “Haha... To easy...”

It was starting to get close to dinner time and Squall thought he’d get some supper. He headed to the cafeteria halfheartedly, knowing that he could’ve been out right now. Along the way he picked up his usual amount of people who point, giggle, start talking to him excitedly, and also the occasional ‘can you sign my weapon?’ Even after so long they still ramble on, but he has become accustomed to the noise around him. Its not that he enjoyed it much, that was what Zell does, but at least he learned some tolerance from Rinoa. “What can’t she do?” thought Squall fondly as he entered the cafeteria to find Zell in line for hotdogs. 

“What do you mean there isn’t any more hotdogs!?! Aww come on... There must be some more... Oh man...”

“I’m sorry Zell... But we’ve run out early tonight. Maybe next time.” And with that, Zell, beat the ground with his fist. “Damnit! I can never get here in time. Oh! Hey Squall. What’s up?” ‘Yes Squall... What is up... He he he...’	

“I wonder. Couldn’t it be a little more obvious for you Zell?”

“Hey man that's harsh. Just making friendly convo. So where's Rinoa? You two are usually with each other.” ‘This might make my job all the more easier.’

“It’s none of your business.” Squall napped with the same tone as his ‘old self’.

“Okay okay no need to get bent out of shape. Well, I am gonna go. I’ ll talk to ya later man.” ‘Not so much later though... Haha...’

Squall watched as Zell took off down the hallway and soon disappeared around the corner. He turned back to the throng of people gathering at the counter. “Man, it is going to be a long night.” thought Squall.

	The newly added air-dock screamed with the sound of powerful engines. The Ragnarok descended from the sky and landed on the ground. After it landed, a long plank fled out of the side of the ship and out stepped an excited Selphie and an almost green Irvine.

	“See I told you you’d make it in one piece!” Selphie exclaimed.

	Irvine, clutching his stomach and kneeling down, smirked. “Yeah, but unfortunately I left a bunch behind...”

	Selphie started down the stairs then looked back at Irvine. “Well, no use worrying about that. We have to get started.” 

	The headmaster sat at his desk. He was looking over the evaluation reports on their new stealth program when Selphie came barging in with great excitement. Cid almost jumped right out of the chair as she bounded across the room to him. Regaining his composure, he stuck the reports in his desk and stood up and greeted her and Irvine, who barely made it through the door.

	While shaking both their hands, Cid said, “How have you been lately you two? I haven’t seen you in so long.” 

	Selphie, wasting no time, replied, “We’re okay I think.” glancing back at Irvine who turned and faced her in a military fashion.

	“Ahh I see. So what is the reason you two came here? I don’t suppose it is to return my ship?” Cid asked hopefully.

	“Nope. We wanted to hire some help!”

Rinoa stood there by the balcony in the Quad. Moonlight lit up most of the area with a dull blue glow while stars shimmered in the night sky. She had heard the Ragnarok land in the air dock awhile ago but she didn’t care much. Her mind was lost somewhere else.

Rinoa, sighing, put her elbows down onto the railing and continued the sort of trance. “Why does it have to be like this. I wish he could just hold me forever and never let go but.

Why does he do this…” Standing back upright she started to count stars… “If only he knew how much I love him. If only for every star in the sky he knew I truly and deeply loved him.” She suddenly realized in awe that she has been saying this out loud the entire time. She quickly glances around to see if anyone else was around, only to calm down when no one is in sight. “Phew, maybe I should go to bed… It’s getting late…”

As Rinoa walked back through the Quad to the main lobby, unbeknown to her, there was someone watching. A man who had a familiar face but yet it wasn’t truly his. He watched until she was out of sight then came out from hiding.

“Damnit all to hell! Squall has now gone way to far. It was bad enough he was going out with MY women, now he disregards her too! God damnit all to hell!” and with a clenched fist, he drove it right through the railing. “I cannot let her go on with this turmoil. I know what I can do. Yeah. That should work. But what if he tries to interfere... Hmm...” The man sits on a nearby bench and thinks to himself. Minutes go by as well as thrown away ideas of what to do. “Wait! I know exactly what to do. But I have to act fast.” Just as abruptly as he appeared, his disappeared just as fast, leaving behind just a rubber mask that looked like Zell.

	Squall walked out of elevator with a sense of well being. He went up to Cid’s office just for a routine report when he found Irvine and Selphie. He couldn’t remember the last time he felt so good about just being able to talk instead of work. He walked slowly down the stairs and headed towards his own room. He realized that not very many people were around. “It must be later than I thought.”

	As he turned the corner to his room, he saw someone enter his room. He was sure who it was, he was too far away to tell, but he thought it might be Rinoa since she is the only one who could come to mind. He picked up the pace and reached his door only moments later. He used his key and opened the room and glanced into the darkness, but all that stared back was just that. He turned on the light and looked around the entire room. There was no one there. 

	Squall sat on the edge of his bed wide awake. “Hmm... Must just have been my imagination. That was a little strange. Never the less, I need to get some sleep.” He kicked off his boots and laid back onto his bed. “Problem is falling asleep.” Squall mused to himself for a while until he was suddenly aware of another presence.

	“Okay now is my chance.” the man started to smile and soon concentrated and spoke the words of a well-known spell. Before Squall even knew what was coming he was hit hard with a sleep spell and he fell back into his pillow. The man’s smile now turned into and evil smirk. “All too easy.” He left the room but without leaving his mark on his victim. He spat into his face. “Well now the fun part is over lets go to the next.” the man mulled over his options as he reached the door of another dorm. This one room was owned by Rinoa Heartilly...

that parts where they are thinking are still regular cuz i don't have time right now to do that.. gota get going... but i would apreciate any and all critisim so far so i could inprove second part and all.... l8rs

Weiila has stopped working on the fanfic section. Send it to d_Galloway, Starstorm, or…uh…the other guy I can’t remember right now.

Interesting part. You should probably have given a bit more info on the other characters as well, but that’s just a personal preference. Also, I think you might want to change the last sentence around, maybe get rid of the was as it seems a bit akward.

Tenchimaru Draconic. But that would be like asking Strom Thurmond to run a marathon.

thanks… i didn’t know that i was suppose to send it to them… thanks alot… i’ll take a look at what you said…

hey forget this one and go to my new one… it is better… unles you totaly loathed this one… then don’t… haha