I went to pick up a prescription today, and I bumped into my ex who works at the local pharmacy. They day was slow, we chatted a bit, and she mentioned that she was “kind of engaged” to her boyfriend, the first one she’s had since myself. I imagine the look I gave her must have been pretty priceless. At first I thought she was joking, but she told me about how they had picked out rings and everything. The two haven’t been dating that long, only about a year, although she first met him about two years ago in Europe. I’d like to hypothesize that a major factor in the failing of our relationship was the fact that she was pining over him the whole time we were going out. The first and only time that I met this guy was not all that pleasant. Who would want to hang out with the guy your ex-gf was always comparing you to, the guy you could never live up to?
Somehow the idea of her marrying this guy has made me happy for two reasons. First, it puts the final nail in the relationship coffin while fully crossing over to the friendship, uh… well, not coffin, but you get the idea. 
The worst part about our relationship is that it went on way longer than it was supposed to. I considered our final breakup to be the finishing word on that, but I think I still had some feelings for her for a few months. Gradually the awkwardness has subsided, and this is that point where I realize that it’s gone completely.
Second, I have no reason to feel inadequate anymore. If any of you have seen High Fidelity (a great post-breakup movie if ever there was such a thing), it’s like when the main character goes back to see his first girlfriend, to find out she married the guy that came after him. I totally understand that now. It’s not like she left me for some shmuck… this was her Mr. Right I was up against. No shame in being beaten by the best. I like to think I’m still the better catch, but that’s all a matter of opinion, and I’m certainly much happier having gone through that mess with her and finding a much better catch for myself.
I didn’t think it would easy to be happy for an ex like that. It didn’t even cross my mind that I would feel any other way. I’m just happy, for her, but probably more for myself.