“The guys I know with girlfriends, they tell me the same thing as the guys I know who smoke. They say ‘sure, it seemed really cool at first, but now I wish I’d never started.’”
– Me.
Ah, the wonders of tabbed browsing.
quotes many of Bad Religion’s lyrics
I know my apprehensions might never be allayed, and so I close, realizing that perhaps, the ending, has not yet, been written… -<i>Myst</i>
Myst! 
You rock, Merl.
Some of my favorites are:
-Failing to plan is planning to fail.
(I’m an organization- freak)
- We need burger flippers
(best quote ever! :D)
-Mess with the best- die like the rest.
-
Come out, come out wherever you are…
-
Get lost, bitch.
-(Who knows,) Who cares.
-
Oooh, conversation. A word with four syllables. Would you like some ice before your brain overheats? (xXx)
-
@_@ THE NET!!!.. the INTER- net!
ching jump -
weirdos aaaall over the place.
Those quotes are my favorites because they’re overused by me in real life together with a few others I cant remember right now.
Uhhh…
I quote everything and everyone all the time…
I can’t pick any favorite quote 
But here’s some that I like:
“But clay pidgeons, the FUCKERS! They just fly though your house like “whooosh”.
I mean, they don’t even eat flies.
Real pidgeons eat flies, so they’re good. Keep them.
Flies don’t eat fuck-all so kill 'em.”
“And the thing about clay pidgeons is that people always shoot them in the air.
I say wait until they land, and then go up to them and shoots and imaginary clay pdgeon on the ground. A lot easier.”
“You! Cake or death!?”
“They drill for coal, oil, diamonds or just love of drilling.” (About cats. They don’t lie behind sofas and purr, they drill :P)
And just about anything else that Eddie Izzard has said.
“Don’t quote me!”
Poke likes Izzard. Poke wins.
“Stay still goddamnit! I don’t care if you see a two-eyed…guh…er…FISH!” (A lot funnier when heard)
“Der Fuhrer does not say ‘Achtung Baby.’”
“Man goes into cage. Cage goes into water. Sharks in the cage, our shark.”
“JA! MEIN LEAPEN!”
“Mint has that quiet elegance about her, but I bet Arche fucks like a tiger.”
One death is a tragedy, one million a statistic.
-Josef Stalin
To know a thing well, know its limits. Only then can true nature be seen.
-The Amtal Rule
Even if I go to hell I will live till the end of the world. And if the world does not come to an end, I will destroy it with my own hands.
-Lacan
There is one by Darwi Odrade (the “Real boats rock quote” for those who know it) but I can’t recall the exact quote at the moment.
“In the first six to twelve months of a war with the United States and Great Britain I will run wild and win victory upon victory. But then, if the war continues after that, I have no expectation of success.”
- Admiral Isoroku Yamamoto, Commander in Chief of the Japanese Navy (1940)
“The mindless rejoicing at home is really appalling; it makes me fear that the first blow against Tokyo will make them wilt at once…I only wish that [the Americans] had also had, say, three carriers at Hawaii…”
- Admiral Isoroku Yamamoto, Commander in Chief of the Japanese Navy (1942)
“The future of the Empire depends on this battle. All men must do their utmost.”
-Admial Heihachiro Togo, Russo-Japanese War (About the battle of Tsushima)
-Admiral Chuichi Nagumo, World War II (Right before Pearl Harbor)
Plus look at my signature.
Okay, I’m going with the Soviet Russia one. Anyway …
“The Netherworld has gone to hell while you were sleeping!”
-Etna (Disgaea)
“You know …”
“What?”
“You really stink!”
“Same to you!”
“When we get back, you should take a bath!”
“I hate baths!”
“I can tell!”
“I know! Let’s take one together!”
“You little …!” smack
“Ow! Watch it, or we’ll have an accident!”
-Kei and Kaneda, in <font face=impact>AKIRA</font>
I just thought of another-
“WHAT’D THE 5 FINGERS SAY TO THE FACE? SMACK!”
“IM RICK JAMES BITCH!”
Here are my top three:
“Live life like you’ll die tomorrow. Dream like you’ll live forever.” - I don’t know who said.
“I’ll tell you a little secret. You know how dumb the average man is right? Well most, are actually dumber than that.” (Or words to that effect at least)- Lewton (Discworld: Noir)
see sig
“Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.”
-John Lennon
Why discuss death and life? No one can tell the difference. No one alive anyway.
Me.
See the oxymoron?
Quotes are only good, if they make you seem smart because you knew what some guy said long ago. And you aren’t quoting the guy you’re talking to. Or that guy isn’t smart enough to realize that you are actually quoting yourself and crediting someone else in case it sounds stupid.
A couple others I feel are worth mention.
“It’s Spaceball 1…they’ve gone to plaid!”
-From Spaceballs
(I’ve always loved that one, for some reason)
“You’re the king? Well, I didn’t vote for you.”
-From Monty Python and the Holy Grail
“I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again,
If you could just listen then it might make sense…”
-From “All I Want”, by Offspring
They may be shattered, but they’re still dreams.
-Me
Please quote me.
-Me
“I WILL RULE YOU ALL WITH AN IRON FIST! YOU THERE OBEY THE FIST!”
“First I rule McMeaties… then I rule the world!”
“How many promotions till I become lord of all humans?
Guy: About…six.”
“CHICKENFOOT! COME BACK! You’re not a monster! You’re just stupid!”
Man Zim rocks.
“Don’t take any guff from those fucking swine”
-Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas
“Exterminate all rational thought. That is the conclusion I have come to.” - Naked Lunch
“Just remember this. All agents defect, and all resisters sell out. That’s the sad truth, Bill. And a writer? A writer lives the sad truth like anyone else. The only difference is, he files a report on it.” - Naked Lunch
“No American should find himself in a foreign land without a pistol.” - Naked Lunch
Originally posted by Devillion
[b]I just thought of another-“WHAT’D THE 5 FINGERS SAY TO THE FACE? SMACK!”
“IM RICK JAMES BITCH!” [/b]
KYAHAHAHAHAHA Dave Chappell is funnay!
Brandt: You clean, we’ll sweep.
Brandt: I told you I would make my career with you, Preston.
Brandt: Cleric, I can only hope one day to be as uncompromising as you.
DuPont: And you, Preston, the supposed savior of the resistance are now its destroyer and along with them, you’ve given me yourself… calmly… coolly… Entirely without incident.
John Preston: No…
[Polygraph goes dead]
Technician: Oh… Shit!
John Preston: Not with out incident.
DuPont: Be careful Preston. You’re treading on my dreams.
Brandt: Mind the uniform Cleric.
[unsheathes a katana]
Brandt: I plan to be wearing it for a long time.
DuPont: Wait! Wait! Look at me. Look at me. I’m life. I live… I breathe… I feel. Now that you know it, can you really take it? Is it really worth the price?
[Preston sees a flash of Mary’s face]
John Preston: I’d pay it gladly.
Mary: Let me ask you something. Why are you alive?
John Preston: I live to safeguard the continuity of this society, to serve Libria.
Mary: It’s circular. You exist to continue your existence. What’s the point?
John Preston: What’s the point of your existence?
Mary: To feel! 'Cause you have never done it, you can never know it. But it’s as vital as breath. And without it, without love, without anger, without sorrow, breath is just a clock… ticking.
Partridge: You always knew.
[begins to read from Yeats]
Partridge: “But I, being poor, have only my dreams. I have spread my dreams under your feet. Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.” I assume you dream, Preston.
[Emotion is a crime.]
Robbie Preston: I saw a boy crying today at school. He didn’t no anyone saw. But I saw. Should I report him?
John Preston: Unquestionably.
Brandt: I’m not feeling! He is the one who’s feeling!
DuPont: You really should learn how to knock.
John Preston: I’ll do what I can to see they go easy on you.
Partridge: We both know they never “go easy”.
John Preston: There’s no war. No murder.
Partridge: What is it you think we do?
John Preston: No. You’ve been with me, you’ve seen how it can be–the jealousy, the rage.
Partridge: A heavy cost. I pay it gladly.
[reaches for his gun]
Randal Graves: Melodrama coming from you is about as natural as an oral bowel movement.
Caitlin Bree: Why aren’t there any lights back there?
Randal Graves: Well, there are, but for some reason, they stop working at 5:14. Nobody can figure it out. The boss doesn’t want to pay the electrician money because the electrician owes money to the video store.
Caitlin Bree: Such a sordid state of affairs.
Randal Graves: And I’m caught right in the middle - torn between my loyalty to the boss and my desire to piss with the lights on.
Caitlin Bree: Well, I’ll try to manage.
Randal Graves: Oh, hey Caitlin, break his heart again this time, and I’ll kill ya. Nothing personal.
Cat Admiring Bitter Customer: Cute cat. What’s his name?
Randal Graves: Annoying customer.
Cat Admiring Bitter Customer: [grabs pack of cigarettes] Fuckin’ dickhead.
Jay: What’s up, baby? What’s up, sluts?
Randal Graves: My mom’s been fuckin’ a dead guy for 30 years. I call him dad.
Jay: I’ve had some girlfriends too, but all they wanted from me was weed and shit.
Dante Hicks: Call the police!
Randal Graves: Why?
Dante Hicks: Because there’s a stranger in our bathroom that just raped Caitlin!
Randal Graves: She said she did all the work!
Dante Hicks: Will you shut the fuck up!
[After losing a hockey ball from the roof.]
Dante Hicks: Are there any balls down there?
Jay: About the biggest pair you ever seen, dingleberry!
Dante Hicks: Hey, whatcha rent? “Best of Both Worlds”?
Randal Graves: Hermaphroditic porn. Starlets with both organs. You should see the box. Beautiful chicks with dicks that put mine to shame.
Dante Hicks: And you rented this?
Randal Graves: Hey, I like to expand my horizons.
Caitlin Bree: I’m offering you my body and you’re offering me semantics.
Dante Hicks: You know what the real tragedy of this day is? I’m not even supposed to be here today!
Randal Graves: Oh, fuck you! Fuck you, pal! There you go again trying to pass the buck. I’m the source of all your misery. Who closed the store to play hockey? Who closed the store to go to a wake? Who tried to win back his ex girlfriend without even discussing how he felt about it with his present girlfriend? You want someone to blame for today? Blame yourself. “I’m not even supposed to be here today.” You sound like an asshole! Jesus, nobody twisted your arm to be here today. You’re here under your own volition. You like to think that the weight of the world rests on Dante’s shoulders. Like this place would fall apart if Dante wasn’t here. Christ, you overcompensate for what’s basically a monkey’s job. You push fucking buttons. Anybody can just waltz in here and do our jobs. You’re so obsessed with making it seem so much more epic and important than it really is. You work at a convenience store, Dante! And badly, I might add! I work at a shitty video store, badly as well. That guy Jay’s got it right, man. He’s got no delusions about what he does. Us, we like to think that we’re so much more advanced than the people that come in here everyday to buy paper, or, god forbid, cigarettes. Well, if we’re so fucking advanced, what are we doing working here?
Randal Graves: Which did you like better? “Jedi” or “The Empire Strikes Back”?
Dante Hicks: “Empire”.
Randal Graves: Blasphemy!
Dante Hicks: “Empire” had the better ending. I mean, Luke gets his hand cut off, finds out Vader’s his father, Han gets frozen and taken away by Boba Fett. It ends on such a down note. I mean, that’s what life is, a series of down endings. All “Jedi” had was a bunch of Muppets.
Randal Graves: [reading a magazine] Have you ever wondered how much the average jizz-mopper makes per hour?
Dante Hicks: What’s a jizz-mopper?
Randal Graves: He’s the guy that cleans up the nudie booth after each guy jerks off.
Dante Hicks: Nudie booth?
Randal Graves: Yeah, nudie booth. You’ve never been in a nudie booth?
Dante Hicks: I guess not.
Randal Graves: Oh, it’s great. There’s this glass between you and these chicks, and they put on a show for you for like 10 bucks.
Dante Hicks: What kinda show?
[Customer walks up to counter with a bottle of glass cleaner and a roll of paper towels.]
Randal Graves: They do the weirdest, craziest shit you like to see chicks do. They insert things into any opening on their body - ANY opening.
Dante Hicks: Could we not talk about this right now?
Randal Graves: The jizz-mopper’s job is to clean off the glass after each guy shoots a load. I don’t know if you noticed, but cum leaves streaks if you don’t clean it right away.
Offended Customer: I will never come to this place again!
Dante Hicks: I’m sorry?
Offended Customer: Using filthy language in front of the customers, you both should be fired!
Dante Hicks: I’m sorry, I guess we got carried away.
Offended Customer: I don’t know if sorry could make up for it, you’ve highly offended me.
Randal Graves: Well if you thinks that’s offensive, check this out!
[Shows him graphic picture from porn mag.]
Randal Graves: I think you can see her kidneys!
Low I.Q. Video Customer: Do you have that one with that guy who was in that movie last year?
Randal Graves: They never rent anything good either. They always choose the most intellectually devoid stuff on the rack.
Dante Hicks: I thought I told you not to be dealing in front of the store.
Jay: I ain’t dealin’, man, what you talkin’ about?
Customer: Hey, man, you got anything?
Jay: Yeah, man, what you want?
Indecisive Video Customer: They say so much, but they never tell you if it’s any good… are either one of these any good?
[Randal ignores her.]
Randal Graves: What?
Indecisive Video Customer: Are either one of these any good?
Randal Graves: I don’t watch movies.
Indecisive Video Customer: Well, have you heard anything about either one of them?
Randal Graves: I find it’s best to stay out of other people’s affairs.
Indecisive Video Customer: You mean you’ve haven’t heard anybody say anything about either one of these?
Randal Graves: Nope.
Indecisive Video Customer: [Turns around, then shows Randal the same movies] Well, what about these two?
Randal Graves: Oh, they suck.
Indecisive Video Customer: These are the same two movies! You weren’t paying any attention!
Randal Graves: No, I wasn’t.
Indecisive Video Customer: I don’t think your manager would appreciate…
Randal Graves: I don’t appreciate your ruse, ma’am.
Indecisive Video Customer: I beg your pardon?
Randal Graves: Your ruse; your cunning attempt to trick me.
Indecisive Video Customer: I was only pointing out that you weren’t paying any attention to what I was saying!
Randal Graves: And, I hope it feels good.
Indecisive Video Customer: You hope WHAT feels good?
Randal Graves: I hope it feels so good to be right. There’s nothing more exhilarating than pointing out the shortcomings of others, is there?
Indecisive Video Customer: Well, this is the last time I rent here!
Randal Graves: You’ll be missed.
Indecisive Video Customer: Screw you!
[leaves]
Randal Graves: [runs to the door] Hey! You’re not allowed to rent here anymore!
Cold Coffee Lover: What do you mean there’s no ice! I have to drink this coffee hot?
Dante Hicks: You ever notice how all the prices end in nine? Damn, that’s eerie…
Silent Bob: You know, there’s a million fine looking women in the world, dude. But they don’t all bring you lasagna at work. Most of 'em just cheat on you.
Randal Graves: People say crazy shit during sex. One time I called this girl “Mom.”
Dante Hicks: Yeah, I mean aside from the cheating, we were a great couple. I mean that’s what high school was about, algebra, bad lunch, and infidelity.
Dante Hicks: You said you only had sex with three different guys; you never mentioned him!
Veronica Loughran: Because I never HAD sex with him.
Dante Hicks: You sucked his dick!
Veronica Loughran: We went out a few times. We never had sex but we fooled around.
Dante Hicks: Oh my God, WHY did you tell me you only had sex with three different guys?
Veronica Loughran: Because I DID only have sex with three different guys; that doesn’t mean I didn’t just go with people.
Dante Hicks: Oh my God, I feel so nauseous!
Veronica Loughran: I’m sorry, Dante, I thought you understood!
Dante Hicks: I did understand! I understood that you had sex with three different guys and that’s all you said!
Veronica Loughran: Please calm down.
Dante Hicks: How many?
Veronica Loughran: Dante…
Dante Hicks: How many dicks have you sucked?
Veronica Loughran: Let it go!
Dante Hicks: How many?
Veronica Loughran: All right, shut up a second and I’ll tell you! Jesus! I didn’t freak out like this when you told me how many girls you fucked!
Dante Hicks: This is different, this is important. How many?
[long pause as customer buys something]
Dante Hicks: Well?
Veronica Loughran: Something like… 36.
Dante Hicks: What? Something like 36?
Veronica Loughran: Lower your voice.
Dante Hicks: Wait a minute, what is that anyway, something like 36? Does that INCLUDE me?
Veronica Loughran: Ummm… 37.
Dante Hicks: I’m 37?
Dante Hicks: All right, so even if independent contractors are working on the Death Star, why are you uneasy with its destruction?
Dante Hicks: My girlfriend’s sucked 37 dicks!
Customer with Diapers: In a row?
Dante Hicks: Hey, try not to suck any dick on the way through the parking lot!
Randal Graves: This job would be great if it wasn’t for the fucking customers.
Caged Animal Masturbator: It’s important to have a job that makes a difference, boys. That’s why I manually masturbate caged animals for artificial insemination.
Dante Hicks: But you hate people.
Randal Graves: Yes, but I love gatherings. Isn’t it ironic?
Chewlies Gum Rep: Please, Mr. Merchant of Death, sir, please, sell me something that will stink up my breath and my clothes and fry my lungs.
Dante Hicks: What’s your encore? Do you, like, anally rape my mother while pouring sugar in my gas tank?
[Randal is on the phone when a woman and little girl come to the counter.]
‘Happy-Scrappy’ Mom: Excuse me, do you sell videos?
Randal Graves: Yeah, what’re you looking for?
‘Happy-Scrappy’ Kid: Happy Scrappy Hero Pup.
Randal Graves: Okay, hang on, I’m on the phone with the distribution house now, lemme make sure we got it. What was it called again?
‘Happy-Scrappy’ Mom: Happy Scrappy Hero Pup.
‘Happy-Scrappy’ Kid: Happy Scrappy…
‘Happy-Scrappy’ Mom: She loves it.
Randal Graves: Obviously. Yeah, hello, this is RST Video, customer number 4352, I need to place an order. Okay, I need one each of the following tapes: “Whispers in the Wind”, “To Each His Own”, “Put It Where It Doesn’t Belong”, “My Pipes Need Cleaning”, “All Tit-Fucking Volume 8”, “I Need Your Cock”, “Ass-Worshipping Rim-Jobbers”, “My Cunt Needs Shafts”, “Cum Clean”, “Cum-Gargling Naked Sluts”, “Cum Buns III”, “Cumming in Socks”, “Cum On Eileen”, “Huge Black Cocks and Pearly White Cum”, “Girls Who Crave Cock”, “Girls Who Crave Cunt”, “Men Alone II: the KY Connection”, “Pink Pussy Lips”, and, uh, oh yeah, “All Holes Filled with Hard Cock”. Uh-huh… yeah… Oh, wait, and, what was that called again?
Jay: I don’t care if she’s my cousin or not, I’m gonna knock those boots again tonight.
Sanford: Hey, Dante, I’m gonna grab a Gatorade.
Dante Hicks: If you grab a Gatorade, then everyone’s gonna grab one.
Sanford: So?
Dante Hicks: So, who’s gonna pay for all these Gatorades?
Sanford: What do you care, you shoe polish-smelling motherfucker?
Dante Hicks: Hey, I have a responsibility here. I can’t have everybody grabbing free drinks.
Sanford: Responsibility? What responsibility? You’re closing the fucking store to play hockey!
Randal Graves: He’s blunt, but he’s got a point.
Dante Hicks: Will you let me maintain some semblance of managerial control here?
Sanford: No, all I’m sayin’ is that if you’re gonna be insubordinate, you might as well go the full nine, not pussy out when it comes to free shit to drink.
Randal Graves: He’s right, as if we’re suddenly gonna have a run on Gatorade.
Sanford: Fuckin’ A!
Dante Hicks: All right! Jesus! You fuckers are pushy!
Randal Graves: I could do without the customers in the video store.
Dante Hicks: Which ones?
Randal Graves: All of them.
Dante Hicks: Embolism in a pool, what an embarrassing way to die.
Randal Graves: That’s nothing compared to how my cousin Walter died.
Dante Hicks: How did he go?
Randal Graves: He broke his neck.
Dante Hicks: You call that embarrassing?
Randal Graves: He broke his neck while trying to suck his own dick!
Jay: Noinch, Noinch, Noinch, Schmokin Weed, Schmokin Weed, Doin Coke, Drinkin Beers… "
Jay: Cock-smoker!
Blue Collar Man: Excuse me, I don’t mean to interrupt, but what are you talking about?
Randal Graves: The ending of “Return of the Jedi.”
Dante Hicks: We’re talking about whether any independent contractors working on the uncompleted death star were innocent victims when the rebels destroyed it.
Olaf Oleeson: [singing] My love for you is like a truck, BERZERKER! Would you like some making fuck, BERZERKER!
Jay: [snickering] That’s pretty fucking funny.
Jay’s Lady Friend: Did he just say “making fuck”?
Dante Hicks: Somebody put gum in the locks.
Randal Graves: Buncha savages in this town.
Dante Hicks: That’s what I said.
Jay: You know, Silent Bob, you’re a rude mother-fucker… but you’re cute as hell. I could go down on you, suck you, line up three other guys and make like a circus seal.
Jay’s Lady Friend: Can he speak English?
Jay: Yeah, but he can’t not speak it like we do.
Sanford: You’re living in denial and suppressing rage, motherfucker!
Dante Hicks: No. I have to leave early to pick up Caitlin. In which case, you’re going to have to lock up the store tonight.
Randal Graves: All right, but you’re missing out. Chicks with dicks!
Randal Graves: Oh what, what’s with you, man? You haven’t said anything for like twenty minutes. What the hell’s you’re problem?
Dante Hicks: This life.
Randal Graves: This life?
Dante Hicks: Why do I have this life?
Randal Graves: Have some chips, you’ll feel better.
Dante Hicks: I’m stuck in this pit, working for less than a slave wages. Working on my day off, the goddamn steel shutters are closed, I deal with every backward ass fuck on the planet. I smell like shoe polish. My ex-girlfriend is catatonic after fucking a dead guy. And my present girlfriend has suck 36 dicks.
Randal Graves: 37
Low I.Q. Video Customer: OOOOOOH! NAVY SEALS!
[Randall is watching hermaphroditic porn]
Caitlin Bree: What are you watching?
Randal Graves: Children’s programming.
Randal Graves: Listen to you, you’re so repressed.
Dante Hicks: What? Because I never tried to suck my own dick?
Randal Graves: Some guy came into the store refusing to pay late fees. Said the store was closed for two hours yesterday. I tore up his membership.
Dante Hicks: Shocking abuse of authority.
Randal Graves: Hey, I’m a firm believer in the philosophy of a ruling class. Especially since I rule.
Dante Hicks: Interesting post script to that story - you know who wound up with Brad in that dark bedroom?
Randal Graves: Your mother?
Dante Hicks: Alan Harris.
Randal Graves: Chess team Alan Harris?
Dante Hicks: The two moved to Idaho shortly after graduation. They raise sheep.
Randal Graves: That’s frightening.
Dante Hicks: Takes different strokes to move the world.
Randal Graves: In light of this, I don’t see how you can romanticize your relationship with Caitlin. She broke your heart and inadvertently drove men to deviant lifestyles.
Randal Graves: Fine then, just let me borrow your car.
Dante Hicks: What for?
Randal Graves: I want to go rent a movie. What was that?
Dante Hicks: You work at a video store!
Randal Graves: I work at a shitty video store! I want to go to a good video store and get a good movie!
Randal Graves: Do you know what I just watched?
Dante Hicks: Me pulling a can off some moron’s fist?
Randal Graves: Return of the Jedi.
[Veronica sprays a crowd pelting Dante with cigarettes]
Veronica Loughran: All right, who’s leading this mob?
Woolen Cap Smoker: [coughing] That guy.
Veronica Loughran: Hold it! Let’s see some credentials. SLOWLY. You’re a Chewley’s Gum Representative? And you’re what? Stirring up all this anti-smoking sentiment to sell more gum? GET OUT OF HERE! And you people, don’t you have jobs to go to? Get out of here, go commute! Bunch of easily-led automatons. Try thinking for yourselves before you pelt an innocent man with cigarettes!
Woolen Cap Smoker: [approaches the counter] Uhhhh… pack of cigarettes?
[Randal has a sign that says “I EAT COCK”]
Dante Hicks: Who eats cock?
Randal Graves: Bunch of savages in this town.
Randal Graves: Hey, you and I have something in common - we both eat Chinese.
Caitlin Bree: Dick.
Randal Graves: Exactly.
Randal Graves: Why don’t you join her and make a little bathroom bam bam?
Dante Hicks: I love your sex talk. It’s so kindergarten. “Poo poo”. “Wee wee”.
Randal Graves: Fuck you.
Dante Hicks: Just go. Just go open the video store.
Jay: Yeah! Go open the video store!
Randal Graves: Shut the fuck up, junkie.
[About Russian Friend]
Jay: He cannot speak good like us.
Randal Graves: What did your mom say when you told her you weren’t engaged anymore?
Caitlin Bree: She said not to come home until graduation.
Randal Graves: Wow, you got thrown out for Dante?
Caitlin Bree: What can I say? He does weird things to me.
Randal Graves: Can I watch?
Caitlin Bree: You can hold me down.
Randal Graves: Can I join in?
Caitlin Bree: You might be let down. I’m not a hermaphrodite.
Randal Graves: Hey, few are.
#812 Wynarski: Hey kid, you seen a set keys around here?
Randal Graves: No time for love, Doctor Jones!
#812 Wynarski: Fuckin’ kids!