Got this in an email from my aunt, and I thought I’d share. Enjoy. Or don’t.
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Saddam was a good guy when Regan armed him, a bad guy when Bush’s daddy made war on him, a good guy when Cheney did business with him and a bad guy when bush needed a “we can’t find Bin Laden” diversion.
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Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is communist, but trade with China and Viet Nam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.
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A woman can not be trusted with decisions about her own body, but multinational corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind without regulation.
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Jesus loves you and shares your hatred of homosexuals and Hilary Clinton.
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The best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops in speeches while slashing veteran’s benefit and combat pay.
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If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won’t have sex.
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Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy. Providing health care to all Americans is socialism.
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HMO’s and insurance companies have the best interest of the public at heart.
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Global warming and tobacco’s link to cancer are junk science, but creationism should be taught in our schools.
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A president lying about an extramarital affair is an impeachable offense. A president lying to enlist support for a war in which thousands die is solid defense policy.
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Government should limit itself to the powers named in the constitution, which include banning gay marriage and censoring the internet.
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The public has a right to know about Hillary’s cattle trades, but George Bush’s cocaine conviction is none of our business.
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Being a drug addict is a mortal failing and a crime, unless you are a conservative radio host. Then it’s an illness and you need our prayers for your recovery.
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You support states’ rights, which means Attorney General John Ashcroft can tell states what local voter initiatives they have the right to adopt.
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What Bill Clinton did in the 60’s is of vital national interest. What Bush did in the ‘80”s is irrelevant.