Zombie outbreaks!

Anyone got any ideas on how to survive a zombie outbreak? Just in case you know?

A classic question, but ultimately, a needless worry! Not because “zombies aren;t real”, my word, no! Nobody fears the zombie outbreak more than I do! or did, at least. But then, a rather verbose green tyrannosaurus Rex pointed out just why my fears were pointless: Obsoive.

So you see, your fears are baseless! …Even if I still keep my “Emergency ZOmibe Epidemic” kit under my bed, just in case.


I saw something on this once. I think you use a chainsaw.

Chainsaws use gas. Gas runs out. If you’re using something with a limited supply, get a shotgun. Gives you range and high damage potential. No automatics, generally. They waste too many bullets, and the bullets are too small to keep a zombie down for any length of time and not too likely to return the undead motherfucker to rest.
I’d take a shotgun, I’m thinking an M870, maybe, since I know someone who owns one and would readily give it over to me in a time of need. For close quarters, I’m gonna want a battle axe, since it can be used as a very heavy chopping weapon and an unwieldy, but nonetheless deadly, bludgeon. In addition, the hooks formed by the blade and handle can be used to deflect zombie limbs in a parry.
Now, there’s the problem of extended survival. Stilt-houses are good, but zombies may be able to break or even climb stilts, and you will eventually start running out of food. For disease reasons, zombie meat is a bad idea to ingest. Hunting on land is dangerous, since zombies will be everywhere in a short time. I have a solution greatly superior to a stilt-house, though; a boat. A catamaran is my current choice, purely for affordability, efficacy as a small-time fishing vessel, and the fact that they can run off both sail and engine power. Zombies will most likely lack the motor control to swim, and probably will not float, although it’s possible. Even so, swimming zombies will be much easier pray than running ones, as they have to climb on to the Cat’ to get at me, by which time I can chop or gun them down. On the cat’, I can fish for enough food to abide. Finally, if I’m able to safely find other survivors, I can hold others on the cat’, and find an island where the zombies have not reached to establish a base camp and keep the human race alive by making sure only non-infected humans are transported there. A defensive perimiter would be established if zombies displayed the ability to swim effectively. If they did not, the pressure of walking on the ocean floor would crush them, and they would have trouble reaching the island in sufficient numbers to mount an assault by merely floating.

Alright, Arac, but what if the monsters you have to face are Marvel zombies?

Well, first, there would have to be Marvel characters to zombify. When the Marvel characters appear, I’ll plan for that eventuality. Until then, it’s considered to unlikely to occur, from a sheer outlook of probability.

If you’re bound tos tay on land, though, rememebr to go north, where it’s colder. The Zombies can;t stand the cold, because their blood is cold, if it even has any left. And it’s more rural, so you can acclimate easier. Your best bet is to CVaravan there. The ideal setuop is four keeps and a pickup truck, with 2-four people per vehicle. Have a whole bunch of guns, molotov cocktails, bladed weapons, and anything you need to journey. if the zombies swarm, and are too much, you can all scramble, and meet up alter at a determined point.

In that instance, with a larger group, taking a few eighteen wheelers is also advisable, in addition to CV radios; the trucks to blockade narrow passes to slow the zombie advance, in addition for their holding capacity (although, due to blockades, never fill them totally full so they can be easily sacrificed and their passengers evacuated to another truck); CVs for wide communication of meeting points.

Find a gun with unlimited ammo.

It worked for me.

We can’t call up the console in real life, Mil =p

Rather than destroying zombies, it could be fun to have them do the jobs that no one else wants to do. Think of it. If you watched “Shawn of the Dead” you know what I’m talking about.

Zobies are helpful! They reduce the population, reducing the amount of people to be unemployed, and they can give people jobs as zombie-killers, further reducing the unemployment rate. With higher employment, rthere’s more money flowing, stimulating the economy. Therefore, zombies are good for America!

A rifle. With lots and lots of ammo. An assault rifle will do too, as long as you keep your fingers off the full auto. Saw the butt off for more maneuverability. Oh, and try to keep them as far away from you as possible. And keep your fingers off the explodey stuff. You tend to fumble in stressful situations. A lot. ^^;

Full Auto doesn’t keep them back with anything short of a full machinegun. The bullets are usually too small. You’ll waste them too fast, as well.

Does it matter how large a bullet is as long as it goes through their head?

<b><i>DESTROY THE STAIRS</i></b>

I’d say Arac’s idea would be the best, although, for the boat thing, you’d also probably need something to purify the water if you ment to stay on the ocean for a long period of time. Unless you found an island that was safe quickly…stupid variables.

Use soft-nosed bullets


We could always create a army of minute men and kill the zombies! ive heard that zombies have crappy motor skills because they are rotting they should be slow, i mean unless there freashly turned zombies, cuz then you’d be fucked! Especially if the fresh zombie is stronger than you.