You guys suck...congrats! (A Dissertation on Coloring Books)

Wilf demonstrates the laziness of modern society and the decline of artistic expression. Rather than working to create something beautiful (whether it be Arac’s anarcho-counterculture political messages, Vicki’s traditional-yet-conformist works, Hades’ deconstructive analysis of art, or Cav’s corporate pandering), Wilf decides to lazily accept what others create for him. He finds little joy in the process of creation, choosing instead to concern himself with what is sold to him. He is part of the greater base that keeps Cav in business.

However, by coloring in comic reprints, there’s some latent desire to do something more. While Society has taught him that paying for things is better (indeed, Wilf may come straight out of Brave New World), there’s some primal urge to create. However, because society has indoctrinated him to think that buying is better, he releases his desires by molding them to conform with the Capitalist Pressures he faces. That is, he colors in exactly how he knows the Companies want him to color. Vicki flourishes in her conformity because that is who she is; she naturally holds the same values that Society holds which allows her to flourish under its system. Wilf, on the other hand, conforms because he has been taught to do so.

Look! Did I do good?

I was told this evening the reason for the parent teacher conference was, indeed, because I refused to color in the lines even when Mrs. K politely told me to. This probably has more to do with poor manual dexterity than disobedience of authority, though. Apparently I’d also draw additional things like wings or horns on people, and she found this “disturbing” because it was a fire safety coloring book we had to do. I don’t understand her logic, but I can’t really ask her because she died a few years after I had her. :stuck_out_tongue:

True story: My kindergarten teacher urged my parents to hold me back a year, claiming that I wasn’t socially prepared to move on to first grade.

The crux of their argument: “He colors everything purple!” No joke.

They wanted to hold me back, too. Shit, son. Coloring must be important.

.

Ahaha…you people are incredible. Have fun with your ignorant selves xoxo

My Kindergarten teacher slapped me. beat that.

I was never one for art, admittedly, though I think I had this one Super mario brothers-based coloring book I colored the shit out of. I also used Mario paint a lot. Does that count?

Edit: I thought you left, Mojo.

OH SNAP, YOU GOT ME. I AM A BIGOT. WOE IS ME.

WAIT, WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?

you and your crayon-hating posse are the ignorant ones. We just like to color.

While we’re on the subject of coloring books, awhile back I created this masterpiece. The original still hangs on my wall.

Please note the skillful use of glitter crayons for the pants.

Fixed it for you. :wink: And yes, we do.

(indeed, Wilf may come straight out of Brave New World)

Sooo-ma… SOOO-MAA!!
:hahaha;

“I can’t believe I’m in such a wretched hive of scum and villainy, but saying Hades should have been killed, you would do it yourself, blah blah blah. Big Man on Internet syndrome, even if you’re a chick. It’s also flaming. Hades was probably trolling, I’ll grant that. However, responding in kind is hardly the manner to deal with it. I doubt you’ll see this, but in the future at other forums, if you have a problem with a troll, alert the mods. Don’t try and pretend that you’re some Tuff Gai that would kick the troll’s ass in real life.” -984

What can I say? I like being violent towards disrespect ^^

I have to at least check up on you retards to see all the shit talking. Helps make my day better. I get a good laugh out of it.

Call me a bitch, cunt, drama queen, emo…whatever the fuck you want. If you use “emo” then you deserve to have your throat cut though. Just for being twice as ignorant.

I wish we were Spartans because most of you would of been chucked into the gorge when you were babies.
Ahahaha…I could make some baby stew, yummy.

Look, this is all fascinating, but you’re diverting us from the more important topic of coloring books. So, anyway, 984, what does my coloring history say about me?

As a mod, I must request that you stay on topic and not flame/troll, Mojo. It is simply unbecoming. Now if you excuse us, we have a topic about coloring books to get back to.

A Coloring Book for Lawyers!

Edit: Val, given that you are not one for art, I think you lack a general drive for creativity. However, you colored the fuck out of one book and used Mario Paint. I think you may have more creativity than you think; you just need something to trigger that desire. Mario is the underlying theme. Mario is your muse. Go with it. Flow with it. Let Mario take you down the Green Pipes of Artistic Creativity. Forever will your masterpiece be in another castle, but you will realize that the joy in art comes not from the end result but the journey.

Yeah, you didn’t say anything about my coloring history, either. :frowning:

Cg Chrono, that was a trrue work of art on your deviantart.

So it’s coloring books you want eh? Well I got a coloring book for you. Presenting…

The FEMA coloring book! This is not a joke…it’s real, though you can no longer buy it.

Here is the cover:

It seems like there actually WAS a bomb in the second tower:

OK I don’t even know what the fuck:

It’s too awful just gonna stop now

Coloring signifies your willingness to give in to failure. You only do things you know you can succeed at. In this case, you perceive that you do not “succeed” at coloring and as such label yourself a failure. In order to shield yourself from these feelings of failure, you shy away from the action which brings about your greatest sense of unworth - Coloring.

However, do not feel constrained by the lines. As with life, it is not merely succeeding and failing to reach some imposed goal. You could not color within the lines; you could not reach what Society imposed as the goal you should reach. Instead, live with your “failures.” Embrace them as your own. Then you will know that it does not matter that you could not color within the lines; rather, it is important merely that you colored.

As for your horns, I think they represent your hatred towards your failures. You had horns to drawings to make them twisted, evil. We are conditioned to despise evil things. You hate that you “fail,” so you twist it around into failing to do something which is evil. If you can’t do evil, maybe then you feel you can do good.

Okay…I will stay on topic then. Here is something I “colored”

I made these when I was like 11:

What this site equals to me. A nice fat disgusting chode.

I must ask that you do not post such pictures, Simply. They are against the rules. - 984