Well that was weird

I figure since I whored out my employeed self almost two months ago, that I’m due for a bitching about work thread. Well it’s not really bitching, it’s sharing some odd stuff that has happened. Odd stuff in my mind, at least. I’m sure you all can beat me, but this is my first job, dammit.

Well last night, this middle aged man came in and uh, looked at our merchandise. We’re a women’s clothing store, and when you see a man come in by himself, not waving a credit card in front of his wife, it’s weird. Just weird. Especially when he picked up a skirt and held it up to himself. My manager was there at the time and asked him how he was, and asked him if he was looking for a gift and he uh, said no. He wanted this lime green skirt and lime green blazer to go with it (I would look out the store windows and see him staring at the display…) but he said it wasn’t in his size. My manager said that maybe the window display might be in his size, but he’s all “Nope that;s size 6!” and she checked and he was right. Which was crazy. How do you know a size when you stand 5 or 6 feet away from it? o.O Anyway, I supressed my giggles the entire time, especially when he asked “Is this me?” and held the skirt up, and the look my manager gave me when she followed him in to the back of the store. Not saying anything personally, but it was just an awkward experience.

There were two women that came in tonight and one was trying some shirts on, but both women went into the changing room and I caught these words “Look at that length” followed by “oh yeah.” Yeah yeah I know I’m thinking dirty but it was also funny to me.

I also got a call from my boss’s boss’s boss in Toronto, congratulating the 3000+ dollars we sold today. it was almost like talking to someone famous like Britney Spears, but with an airness of two face-edness, and a person you have no respect for. But she said my name :open_mouth:

Any stories you all want to share?

When I worked at a grocery store I would throw rotten fruit at my boss.

Three guys bought every single bananna in the store one day too. I guess they were making smoothies or something.

Real men wear blazing lime skirts. :slight_smile:

I have a lot to tell, but nothing beyond what you can expect from a night shift waiter job at a pizza place: Drunks passing by, stoners passing by, drunks/stoners stepping in, occasional annoying people and stuff like that.

However, there were some remarkable things:

>Five guys (I’d say about eighteen years old) entered and ordered some drinks, but they were tourists and four of them only spoke English. The one who spoke Spanish made the orders, but the others started speaking to us and throwing insults at random thinking we wouldn’t know what they said while the bilingual guy made fake translation.

[i]Real example:

English: Nice ponytail fuckhead, you look like a chick.
Bilingual: Esa remera es muy linda, donde la compraste? (That shirt is very cool, were did you buy it?). [/i]

I played fool while they were in, but I overcharged them BADLY for the drinks (it’s easy to screw foreigners with cash equivalence when they’re drunk). I made $45 bucks :slight_smile:

>When we were about to close one night, an old guy came in and ordered a pepperoni pizza to go, he picked it up and went off. Five minutes later he came in again, ordered another one and took off. Five minutes later he came back, ordered another one and took off.

We stood there waiting and five minutes later, he was there again. He repeated this process twelve times without giving an explanation and the cook and I (The only ones still there) didn’t ask anything because we were a little bit freaked out. The weirdest thing was that the guy didn’t seem to acknowledge the fact that he had repeated that action before, he came in each time and greeted us in the exact same way.

One time a heroin additct came into the store I work at, and knocked over a popcorn display, layed down in it, and started screaming untill the cops came.

HAHAHA those little tales are hilarious guys. Especially the popcorn thing. Hahaha I can so picture that.

One time a guy came in to my department and wanted to buy a TV. However, he didn’t have the idea of asking one of us. He got the ladder and went to grab a 32 inch flatscreen TV out of the display box. He ripped the power cord out the back of it, tripped, fell and fractured his arm, and lucky for him, the TV knocked off a shelf and didn’t hit him.

I have two silly stories from my old job at a pizza place.

Story 1

One time, I went in to open…when you open at a food place that isn’t 24 hours, you normally go in maybe 30-60 minutes early to warm up the oven. Well anyways, while me and my manager were preparing food and shit, we get a phone call. I answer the phone…Keep in mind that where I live, a lot of people don’t know english. Anyways, here’s how the conversation went:

SG: Mr.G’s Pizza.

Caller: Uhhhhh…Pizza?

SG: I’m sorry sir, but we can’t take your order right now; we don’t open til 11.

Caller: Uhhhhh…Pizza?

SG: Ahhh, Lo siento, pero no abrimos hasta los once. (I’m sorry, but we don’t open til 11.)

Caller: Oh, ok. Well, I’ll just call back later then! Sorry.

SG: …Yeah. Bye.

Some people here do that. They just refuse to talk to you in english if they think you know spanish. It’s ridiculous.

Story 2

You get some real weirdos that come into that place sometimes…Like, people that come in just to see if they can mooch and shit, or people that just loiter. Well, sometimes you get people that come in wanting to know if you know any places to score good drugs. One guy came in and actually asked us if we ourselves carried any marijuana. I was all “uhhh, hold up” and I went back and asked the manager how I should deal with a guy like that. He said “Dude, just give him some oregano in a baggie and see if he goes away.” If you don’t know what Oregano is, it’s just a leaflike spice. It would remind you of marijuana if someone brought it up. I held in my laughter as I went back and just told him “Nah, sorry we don’t have any.” Phew, it was great. :stuck_out_tongue:

A stoner came in once asking for pot too. I gently pointed at our very big and muscled owner an told him what can be more or less translated to “Get the fucking hell out of here before he comes out and kicks your ass”. He ran amazingly fast for someone who was completely wasted.

Why would you do that? Just say “no, sorry man.” No need to threaten physical violence.

A little on the disgusting side, but one day a lady came in to CVS with her kid and asked if he could use the bathroom. The kid sprayed shit all over the walls. It go up over his own height some way. Don’t ask me how - my ass certainly isn’t that powerful.

One time, a long time ago when I worked at Taco John’s, THREE REAL LIVE CANADIANS came in! It was SOOOOOOO WEIRD! They had this funny money with little pictures of loons on it. Isn’t that hilarious?

Because I told him we didn’t have any and he wouldn’t move from the spot, he kept asking over and over (It was obvious he was completely wasted) and started to get a little aggressive. Since the place was packed I had to get him out of there fast mainly because you could smell him from across the room and everyone was looking at us.

It’s better to serve heroin addicts than work with them. Let’s just put it that way. -_-

I once convinced one of the Paperboys he should have his spine pierced. He’s avoided me since. And yes, I got the idea from here.

Wow…well, a fight once broke out between a friend of mine & her boyfriend…they broke up because they got into a huge argument. It was mostly about the guy’s ex-girl, but also because her guy was smokin & rollin weed RIGHT IN FRONT of the store. (I work at a Hop & Sack) They eventually left, but he came back to get the ring off of her, & wrestled her to the ground. It was just wrong…

Wrestling women = good.

These are all too funny.

A stoner got aggressive? He probably wasn’t smoking weed then…

Maybe Meth!