U.S. Department of Corruption, Bribery, and Incompetence

The sad thing is that there’s too much truth in the article for it to truly be funny.

[quote=<A HREF=“http://www.theonion.com/content/node/44892”>The Onion</A>]<B>President Creates Cabinet-Level Position To Coordinate Scandals</B>

WASHINGTON, DC—In a televised address to the nation Monday, President Bush announced a new Cabinet-level position to coordinate all current and future scandals facing his party.
Enlarge ImagePresident Creates Cabinet-Level Position To Coordinate Scandals

President Bush announces his plan to manage the numerous scandals of his administration.

“Tonight, by executive order, I am creating a permanent department with a vital mission: to ensure that the political scandals, underhanded dealings, and outright criminal activities of this administration are handled in a professional and orderly fashion,” Bush said.

The centerpiece of Bush’s plan is the Department Of Corruption, Bribery, And Incompetence, which will centralize duties now dispersed throughout the entire D.C.-area political establishment.[/quote]

I, for one, welcome our new insect overlords.

Bush’s first target: those damn pinko Democrats!

Once again, I am convinced that nothing will come out of this corruption scandal. Most of the indicted Congressmen have hastily retired, and those that remain either use confusing logic to mislead the people or have their corporate buddies bribe those in charge.

Nothing but love for the Onion.

d, fix your sig, it says introuction.

There’s never a stray asteroid around when you need one… >.>

Because causing global disruption and possibly death is definitely worth it, Manus. I mean, it would only be blanketing the world in an atmosphere of dust for a few years, and if big enough, cause worldwide extinction. Nice attitude and solution there.

I never said how big. A meteorite would also be fine, as long as it hit that moron and his buddies.

But what if you were the president’s buddy? Then you’d be dead… and we’d mourn a dear friend… ;_;

Thank god the moral, upstanding people from the Bush administration are there to help protect America from the corrupt, deviant characters in …the Bush Administration.

The Onion! Long live the Onion!
It’s a great satirical piece, but sadly, and unfortunately, tragicomic in that it nearly is true.

Would Manus really be a buddy of the president? No think so. :get it?: The president wouldn’t have time with buddies. He’s busy being presidential.


I find myself highly amused by all this, really.

The fat-cats in Washington are running this world into the sixth reich. fires shotgun at airplane

God I hate america it’s just so stupid

and god the onion is just so stupid people shouldn’t be allowed to joke around anymore

What, did I miss the Fourth and Fifth Reichs?

Sidenote, did you guys read about the politicians who manipulated their own (and collegues’) wikipedia articles? That was kinda… sad. and childish.
<a href=“http://www.theinquirer.net/?article=29400”>Politicians deface wikipedia</a>
<a href=“http://www.lowellsun.com/ci_3464691”>Wikipedia bars Congress from editing entries </a>

Ha ha ha ha ha!!! Priceless!

Thanks for the link, Dragon Tear

Heh. That reminds me of the Penny Arcade where Skeletor defaces He-Man’s article.

I swear, politicians these days are like spoiled kids with too much power. Can’t they all just get sent to Iraq or something?

Fucking politicians and Iraqis dammit