Nah j/k. Maybe. 
http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/28038281/?GT1=43001
http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/28038272/?pg=1#TDY_081204_HowToTalkToGirls
It’s kind of funny because a lot of it is pretty true no matter how old you are. I dig it.
LOL, that’s pretty hilarious. Kids really have a way of cutting to the truth of things without trying to dress things up with diplomatic language, double entendres, or trying to sound cool. I’m always amazed whenever I talk to one, especially at that age (8-12 or so). There’s a lot of wisdom in them.
It’s really funny how all this is still the same no matter how old you are, it’s just the details that get replaced while the framework remains the same.
I was pretty impressed by how the kid actually went and researched this stuff.
Well, been there, done that. That excerpt does touch a few critical points. Oh, and being straight with your feelings usually ends up in the friend zone talk. So much for that, and that sure wasn’t dressed up with diplomatic talk.
Perhaps there should be a “talk frankly” day and you’d notice how much differently people would react to the ‘real’ you, and how much of these people you would retain afterwards. Trying to please everyone is quite the chore, I tell you.
edit: Yes, it sounds bitter and probably is.
Its funny because the little kid is willing to say things that adults consider taboo, like ‘pretty girls just caring about their looks’, or that girls/women are usually the ones to do the dumping, or that “girls have most of the power and win most of the arguments”. Or “make sure your friends don’t like her too so they don’t take her away”. In all seriousness, its good advice. o_O
Mabat: Actually being frank will alienate people from you, since most people don’t want to know the truth about how they come off.
EDIT: The 9-year probably does have more experience than I do. 
The truth can be hurtful, which is why being absolutely truthful can be cruel. Valuing truth over other people’s feelings is the mark of someone with a psychological condition (I don’t remember which one but I’m sure I will right in the middle of my drive home).
Sometimes there is no harm in allowing a pleasant lie to continue.
This kid is a pua in the making. What he says might work, but if he’s suggesting you use a formula to pick up girls whether it’s honest or not, he’s setting a lot of guys up for failure… I’m not too concerned, since his advice is for like, grade 4s >_> But damn, warning signs much?
Sometimes there is no harm in allowing a pleasant lie to continue.
Lies are only okay if everyone knows they’re lies. If you tell an absolute whale of a chick that she’s not fat, she’s not gonna believe you for a second, but she’ll still appreciate it. I hope that’s what you mean.
Certainly, that’s one thing I had in mind, but more than that.
Here’s an example. My brother has a drum set at home and loves drumming. Unfortunately, he doesn’t have that great a sense of rhythm - not absolutely awful, but not very good. He doesn’t do it professionally, just for fun. If he comes to me and asks me how his drumming was, why would I tell him it wasn’t very good? Why would I be such a downer? He’s not going to stop drumming even if he weren’t good, so telling him so is going to accomplish nothing but making him feel bad about doing what he’s already going to do. That’s the kind of situation I had in mind as well.
The part about girls winning arguments is bullshit. As is the part about it ever being a good idea to try and get a girl to love you. Always a bad idea.
Also, there is a fine line between outright lies and positivity. One can be fully genuine without being hurtful. Something like, “You might not be Neal Peart, but I liked it,” says that your brother isn’t a great drummer, but you still enjoy his drumming and is positive, while framing the negative not in the sense of “you are not good,” but in the sense of “you are not as good as a guy who is so good the rest of the prog rock band tolerated his shitty lyrics because of how good he was.”
This kid is a pua in the making. What he says might work, but if he’s suggesting you use a formula to pick up girls whether it’s honest or not, he’s setting a lot of guys up for failure… I’m not too concerned, since his advice is for like, grade 4s >_> But damn, warning signs much?
I was actually gonna comment on the ‘seduction community’ and how I think a lot of its bullshit. Maybe a new thread. But I am correct in thinking you too think its bullshit?
The kid is right about some things, like how women hold the upper hand in this whole business. But that should have been obvious to anyone. Also, the thing about “watch out for your friends” is also good advice; I’ve heard too many stories of that type of thing happening.
The point of amusement isn’t that he knows something most people with a modicum of social life know, it’s the fact that he knows that while being nine. Lighten up, we’re laughing about a precocious kid, not hailing the second advent of Giacomo Casanova.
Women don’t have the upper hand, and thinking in those terms to begin with is kind of flawed. You decide the amount of bullshit you’re willing to put up with to get what you want. It’s the same from their perspective.
Yes, I think the seduction community is bullshit. Not because one night stands are inherently a bad thing, but because “seduction artists” don’t give a shit about what the girl wants. They’re only after sex and they’ll go hunting for it indiscriminately, instead of just sticking to girls who are clearly slutty. It’s destructive in a lot of different ways and it creates victims instead of just being a positive experience for everyone. Seduction is about lying and stealing. It’s about getting something for nothing. And, it’s hard to stop because most girls are pretty dense when it comes to identifying guys like that, and you can’t really call the guy out without looking jealous. So yeah, I think it’s bullshit, but I don’t want you to get my reasoning wrong. There are a lot of girls who want nothing more than a fat cock in their ass and a lot of guys who are willing to give it to them, and that’s not what bothers me. The deceit is what bothers me.
The point of amusement isn’t that he knows something most people with a modicum of social life know, it’s the fact that he knows that while being nine. Lighten up, we’re laughing about a precocious kid, not hailing the second advent of Giacomo Casanova.
Lighten up? What’s that?
Women don’t have the upper hand, and thinking in those terms to begin with is kind of flawed. You decide the amount of bullshit you’re willing to put up with to get what you want. It’s the same from their perspective.
Yes, I think the seduction community is bullshit. Not because one night stands are inherently a bad thing, but because “seduction artists” don’t give a shit about what the girl wants. They’re only after sex and they’ll go hunting for it indiscriminately, instead of just sticking to girls who are clearly slutty. It’s destructive in a lot of different ways and it creates victims instead of just being a positive experience for everyone. Seduction is about lying and stealing. It’s about getting something for nothing. And, it’s hard to stop because most girls are pretty dense when it comes to identifying guys like that, and you can’t really call the guy out without looking jealous. So yeah, I think it’s bullshit, but I don’t want you to get my reasoning wrong. There are a lot of girls who want nothing more than a fat cock in their ass and a lot of guys who are willing to give it to them, and that’s not what bothers me. The deceit is what bothers me.
Huh. Yeah, I agree with a lot of that. But I don’t think that the whole thing is inherently bad, since, like you said, the girls allow themselves to be deceived. So its not like they’re getting raped or anything. When I said it was bullshit, I meant more along the lines of the formulas and whatnot don’t really work. Well, actually, I guess it could have a sort of placebo effect, where it makes someone more confident than they normally would be because they think they’re using the ‘secret formula’ that will always work.
Oh, and I do think women have the upper hand, since they’re the ones who ultimately do the choosing.
I don’t think that’s entirely true, either. Maybe some seduction artists take that stance, but the one that I’ve read is not like that at all. Maybe it’s different with different ones, but the one I read, his stance on getting girls was “Everyone wants love and romance, but in the beginning, it’s a game to most girls. You’re going to have to play the game to get where you want to go, and there’s no problem with having fun on the way.”
It might sound misogynistic, but it’s not. Most girls want to be approached in a certain way, to paint in broad strokes. You can do this, and even have a one night stand or kick off your relations with a girl on the heavy physical end, and that’s not ‘hurting’ them. Even if a girl isn’t inherently ‘slutty’, that doesn’t mean that they can’t - or won’t - also revel in the thrill and fun of having a one night stand, either. There’s nothing wrong with that; you go wherever your excursions lead, and if you like the girl, you like them, and if you don’t, you don’t. No one should be made to feel guilty about that.
I’m actually really ambiguous about the principles of the seduction community. I think a lot of it is true in a general sense, for instance that women want a man who is of the same value as themselves, who won’t compromise himself for them, etc. But a lot of it just rubs me the wrong way. for instance, the tactic that you’re supposed to indirectly insult them to basically lower their self-esteem, so they’re more likely to see you as being better than they are. BTW, its kinda funny how all three of us have all read this stuff. :too bad:
Anyway, I have little actual experience with any of this, i.e. picking up girls, so I think I’ll exit the argument at this point.
God damn kids.
Originally Posted by Excerpt from How to Talk to Girls.
[i]Q: You say that boys should be careful around pretty girls. What do you have against pretty girls?A: Well, pretty girls … all they care about is their looks. She doesn’t care about a boy liking her, or how a boy feels about her. It’s just, “Oh, do I look nice?” Regular girls can be pretty, too. Plus, a regular girl has other things on her mind and is fun to be around.[/i]
If I had thought of this when I was 3. I probably would’ve been far more successful than I had been chasing after the pretty girl.
SG, I know. If two people make the decision to go in a certain direction, that’s fine. Like I said, it’s not the fact that its heavily sexual that bothers me. It’s when girls are deceived into thinking a guy wants to go in the same direction as them when he actually has other plans. For the seduction artist, it’s more about power than love. They don’t want to be loved for who they are, they want to get laid and brag about it later. They’re looking to conquer, not relate. That’s the kind of shit I’d like to put an end to. So don’t think I’m attacking this from a “sex is shallow” angle or anything. If you know a guy who’s looking to pick up girls but has a conscience about it, chances are I wouldn’t consider him a seduction artist to begin with. SA’s are inherently manipulative, the way I define them.
When I said it was bullshit, I meant more along the lines of the formulas and whatnot don’t really work.
The formulas work, but they’ll leave you feeling empty because you know the girl doesn’t like YOU, she likes the guy you’re pretending to be. IMO, any relationship worth having has to be honest. If you can say, “this is what I am, take it or leave it,” and she still wants to be with you, that feeling is worth more than any number of relationships that aren’t.
But, the formulas probably won’t work on any girl actually worth having anyway. Like SG said, they’re broad strokes, and you can cover a lot of generic ground with them, but if you want someone who’s really right for you, you need to eventually move on to a finer brush. You can’t paint the Mona Lisa with a roller.
Anyway, I have little actual experience with any of this, i.e. picking up girls, so I think I’ll exit the argument at this point.
You don’t need to be a chef to know when something tastes like shit. Your points have all been fine so far, and I don’t have much experience either.
How does he spy on these situations without being creepy? That’s what I need to [STRIKE]learn [/STRIKE] know.
Make sure you have good friends who won’t try to take the girl you like.
He’s got bro’s before ho’s down already.
Originally Posted by Hades Shinigami
The formulas work, but they’ll leave you feeling empty because you know the girl doesn’t like YOU, she likes the guy you’re pretending to be. IMO, any relationship worth having has to be honest. If you can say, “this is what I am, take it or leave it,” and she still wants to be with you, that feeling is worth more than any number of relationships that aren’t.
While it’s all very well and good if you’re willing to wait for a person who’ll accept what you are right out of the gate, but the rest of us are going to have to settle for ‘as close as it gets’ sooner or later and compromise the rest of the way there. Of course, forcing yourself to compromise too much and you’re better off letting that one get away.