The RPGC Task Force

The Core Media Forum
41

APPROXIMATELY 11:30 PM THAT NIGHT, AT THE MUSEUM…

Mabat and demigod stood in front of the diamond display, occasionally turning around to face the display itself before turning back towards the rest of the museum. “Two hours and thirty minutes in,” said Mabat. “Have you seen anything?”

“Not a single thing,” said demigod.

“Do you even think Glenton’s going to show up?” asked Mabat. “I mean, this place is guarded heavier than…some sort of place…that’s…heavily guarded. Besides, we all know his great weakness is magic. It’s all a simple matter of hitting him first.”

“I hope you are correct,” said demigod.

MEANWHILE, ON THE ROOFTOP ACROSS FROM THE MUSEUM…

PC Glenton replaced his binoculars underneath his coat and took out a small remote. He moved a few dials and pressed a single red switch, and then quickly took back out the binoculars and zoomed in on the security room. Sure enough, his earlier sabotage had scrambled the feed and replaced it with a previously recorded scene from an earlier night. Smiling at his clever planning, he raised a grappling gun and fired at the museum room, slamming into the air conditioning duct. After tying his end of the gun to a nearby satellite dish, he grabbed onto the cable and flew down the zip line.

Once he had safely alighted on the opposite roof, Glenton made his way to the skylight. None of the panels were designed to swing open, so Glenton reached back into his coat and pulled out a glass cutter, slicing open the glass and quickly catching the panel before it fell. After neatly setting it aside, he looked down onto the diamond exhibit below, his lips went with anticipation. However, the Task Force was still there…

Then he remembered his backup plan. Grabbing the remote again, he pressed a few buttons. His action was soon rewarded with a large explosion, as the bomb he had planted in the owner’s office went off. Security rushed to the room, leaving only the Task Force to deal with. Finally, Glenton pulled a small gernade from his belt, armed it, and dropped it onto the floor below.

Mabat and demigod spun around as the gernade rattled behind them. The small device beeped quickly for a few seconds, before finally emitting a massive cloud of green smoke. Both had no choice but to flee before they fell unconscious or were poisoned to death or suffered whatever other possible effects the smoke gernade may have had. They didn’t even see the zip line lower from the skylight, or PC Glenton, clad in a gas mask, descending into the thick of the smoke.

When the cloud finally cleared, the entire diamond exhibit was gone.

Glenton raced across the rooftops, or at least as quickly as he could with eight sacks worth of diamonds on his back. Finally, he managed to reach his suite, still carrying all his precious gems. Now came the hard part: getting rid of his ill-gotten gain.

THE NEXT MORNING, AT THE MUSEUM…

“WHAT?!” said the owner. “You’re saying someone stole the diamonds behind your back?!”

“It was a…bit more complicated than that,” said Mabat. “It was PC Glenton, after all-”

“THERE IS NO PC GLENTON!” said the owner. “He doesn’t exist! A regular human stole the diamonds, and nothing more! I swear, the UN will hear about this!”

“Do not worry,” said demigod. “We will get your diamonds back. In truth, we already have a plan to do so…”

MEANWHILE, BACK AT THE TASK FORCE HQ…

“Please, think of a plan!” said demigod.

The entire bunker was empty, save for Mabat and demigod. The rest of the Task Force was still embroiled in Iran, trying to prevent a nuclear armageddon. The computer was now showing an old episode of Dr. Who, while Mabat continued to leaf through his “Catgirl Monthly” magazine. “As a matter of fact, I think I do. Now that Glenton has the diamonds, he’ll have to get rid of them.”

“So?” asked demigod.

“He obviously can’t sell them on the legitimate market, so he’ll have to work through the black market,” said Mabat. “Remember, Frederick Denando is a very powerful force on the black market. If Glenton tries to sell them that way, he’ll be tracked down for sure. That leaves only one possible way…”

“He’ll ransom them back,” said demigod.

“Exactly,” said Mabat. “Now, all we have to do is wait.”

(to be continued)

42

Batman can’t beat PC Glenton? I find that very hard to believe.

43

After taking a quick shower, Glenton sat himself on a fine satin armchair, not even bothering to read the paper. Instead, he reached for a nearby phone and called in the only person he was interested in doing business with. “Hello?” asked a voice on the other end. It was a deep voice, and yet was filled with the frailty of old age and concern.

“It’s PC Glenton,” said Glenton. “I have something you want.”

“Glenton! I knew only you could pull off something like that! Where’s my damn diamonds?”

“Someplace safe. And please don’t bother tracing the call, I’ve already taken precautions against that.”

“All right, what do you want?”

“I very well can’t sell the diamonds on the black market, not as long as you’re in charge of a great deal of it. So, I’m offering the diamonds back…”

“HOW MUCH?!”

“Hmmm…it IS quite the collection. I’d say about…800 million.”

“ARE YOU MAD? The collection isn’t worth more than 500 million!”

“Of course, if you don’t want it, I understand. Then again, I DO have a few other things that might interest you. You know, pictures, bribery records, camera footage, witnesses, all that good stuff.”

“…When do you want the money?”

“Tonight, at RPGCity Park. Also, I’ll be wearing a small bomb regulator. Kill me, and your precious collection, along with half of RPGC, will go up with me. Have a good day, Denando.” With that, Glenton hung up the phone and prepared for the night.

MEANWHILE, BACK AT THE TASK FORCE BUNKER…

Mabat and demigod returned the computer to its automated game of strip solitare, having recovered the info they needed. “Now all we need is an attack plan…” said demigod.

THAT NIGHT, IN A SHADED AREA OF RPGCITY PARK…

Glenton sat on a rock, sheltered beneath a pair of tall oak trees. He was wearing his full black clothes, several large sacks at his feet. He didn’t look to his left or right; he simply stared straight down, seemingly oblivious to the world around him. He didn’t even seem to notice the sixty-year-old man aproaching him, barely able to stand even using his cane. His white suit was wrinkled and faded; he had obviously owned it for a long time, and had put it on only minutes before he left for the park. Two large, muscular men in black suits stood behind him, each holding a pair of briefcases.

“Glenton!” said the man. “I’ve brought you what you wanted: $800 million, all in $20 bills!”

“Good,” said Glenton. “Have your lugs bring the money over. They can carry the diamonds on the way back.” With a shrug from the old man, the bodyguards wandered to Glenton and dumped the briefcases, picking up the bags as they left. Glenton moved one hand towards the briefcase, feeling along the locks and metal latches. Almost immediately, he felt something portruding from one of the latches. It didn’t take long to realize it was a wire, the kind used in bombs and not briefcases.

Just as the bodyguards reached the old man, Glenton rose from his rock. “Denando, you’re not a very good sport.”

“What was that?” he shouted.

“I really wanted this deal to go smoothly,” said Glenton. “I’m tired of having to dodge assassins or fight off ambushes every time I try to make some quick cash. Instead, you had to give me a rigged briefcase.”

“You are too paranoid,” said the old man. “Come on, men, let’s leave this fool.”

Glenton quickly reached into his pockets and took out a small, metal thing, which vaguely resembled some kind of lockpick. He shoved it into one of the locks, and the briefcase swung open. Sure enough, a bomb was attached to the top lid, while the bottom only contained chopped-up newspaper. Glenton’s entire body seethed with rage at this betrayal.

Before the old man could get far, Glenton pulled a silenced 9mm out of his jacket and fired two rounds, hitting both bodyguards in the back of the head. The sight of his protection falling dead sent Denando into a panic, but his feeble attempt at running was quickly brought to an end thanks to his poor legs. He whistled, and six more bodyguards showed up, armed with Desert Eagles and Uzis. Glenton dived for cover amongst the trees, quickly puttting away his silenced gun and pulling out a pair of .44 handguns. When the hail of bullets stopped, he dove from his cover, firing with every round he had.

Within seconds, all six bodyguards were dead. Denando tried to crawl away, but Glenton quickly stopped this by stomping on his hand. “Trying to run somewhere, SIR?!”

“P-Please don’t kill me!” screamed Denando. “The other three briefcases…they have the money! Please don’t!”

“Why should I believe you?” asked Glenton. “You scum-sucking, good-for-nothing…”

Suddenly, a blast of energy flew into Glenton, sending him flying into the rock he had previously sat on. Mabatsekker and demigod rushed to the scene, the former’s hand still smoking from the ki bolt he had thrown. “All right, Glenton. The game is up.”

Glenton climbed to his feet, obviously in pain. “So, this is the great RPGC Task Force? Where are the rest of you freaks?”

“Look who is talking,” said demigod. “Now, are you going to come quiety, or do we have to use the hard way?”

“Uh…I surrender,” said Glenton.

Both Mabat and demigod looked at each other, and then back at Glenton. “Ah, you’re supposed to take the hard way!”

“I’m not a retard! I can’t fight you!” said Glenton.

“Why not?” asked demigod.

Glenton growled at them. “BECAUSE YOU WOULD KICK MY ASS!”

“All right, fine!” whined Mabat. “We’ll take you to the damn prison island! Demi, check on Denando.”

demigod looked at the old man, who was now lying completely motionless. “He’s dead. Looks like he had a fright-induced heart attack.” He looked towards the first two dead bodyguards. “Looks like the diamonds are still here.”

“Come on, boys,” said Glenton. “You have a lot of stuff to take down to evidence!” Mabat and demigod groaned at each other, grabbed the bags, cuffed Glenton, and carried him off to the RPGCPD.

THE NEXT DAY…

“And so ends another dissapointing adventure,” said Mabat.

“Does something seem wrong to you?” asked demigod. “It was almost like Glenton wanted to be arrested.”

“Yeah, you’re right,” said Mabat. “But you know what? Let’s just try not to think about it and go on with our lives. Besides, we need to pick up the three…war heroes from the airport.”

MEANWHILE, ON THE PRISON ISLAND…

Glenton was hoisted into his cell, a regular barred, one-cot chamber with only a bucket to piss in and no window. Even as the bars slammed shut, he knew he would easily escape. And as he saw the Nukleoids, sitting in the stasis cells across from him, he knew this would be a worthy trip…

THE END OF ISSUE 3

Next issue: It’s brother and brother vs. uncle and niece! Get ready for the…FAMILY FEUD! cue cheesy 70s game show music

44

Note: The next storyline is Galloway-centric. I didn’t want to use it so early, but the other two I had planned to use before it still require a lot of work, and the events of this issue will have reprecussions throughout the rest of the fic. So, I’m sorry, but here we go…

Issue 4: Family Feud

PUERTO RICO, SIX MONTHS BEFORE…

Wil sat in his house, eating stale bagels and watching whatever crap had come on at the time. His focus stopped only when he heard a loud scream coming from outside, which continued to grow progressively louder and louder. Finally, something slammed through the wall above him, punching a massive hole in the wall and creating a pit in the center of his house. Once the dust had cleared, Gemini picked himself out of the dust, still clad in his ninja outfit and wearing an army helmet. “…What the heck just happened?” asked Wil.

“Just so you know, never travel through cannon,” said Gemini. “It’s really not that comfortable.” He removed the helmet and turned to Wilfredo. “I know this is a lot to ask, but…I’m leaving the ninja. Would you mind training me to be a mage?”

Wil arched his eyebrows. “What? Why would you even WANT to be a mage?”

“I’m pathetic as a warrior,” said Gemini. “I simply wanted to see if it was possible for me to learn magic. I’d be glad to pay you.”

“Sorry, but I really don’t need a student at the time,” said Wil. “I didn’t even have a realy master; how can I possibly teach someone to use magic properly and respectfully? The last student I tried to get was my niece, but her family…”

“Perhaps we can fake our way through it,” said Gemini. “You act like you’ve been training me for a while, they see that their daughter won’t be in any danger, and everyone’s happy. Besides, I’ve already got enough blackmail to con you into killing the US President.”

Wil groaned. “Fine, but at the first sign of trouble…”

THE PRESENT DAY…

Wil, Nel and Gemini stood in Wil’s backyard, staring at a set of beer bottles lined up on a fence. “Alright, this is a basic attack spell drill,” said Wil. “I want each of you to use a low-level spell to break the bottles. Remember, don’t use anything too powerful, or we’ll have a repeat of last week’s regretful incident…”

“Look, I’m sorry, Uncle Wil,” said Nel. “I simply used a little too much power in that magic missile. I didn’t mean to set half of the yard on fire.”

“And I didn’t mean to collapse your neighbor’s roof,” said Gemini.

“Just…be careful this time,” said Wil. He couldn’t believe how slowly Nel was learning; by this time, he had at least learned a small bit of restraint. Gemini wasn’t helping, either; he had a handle on basic magic, but he obviously had no chance of ever learning the most powerful secrets of magic. Sometimes, he wished he could get rid of the idiot once and for all…

Suddenly, Galloway landed ino the yard, right behind Wil. The mage turned to his new partner-in-heroics. “Brother!” shouted Gemini.

“Hey, retard!” said Galloway. He turned his attention back to Wil. “Look, we’ve been in business for a few weeks, and…we need your advice on a few things, like transportation.”

“Thinking of getting a Task Force Mobile?” asked Wil. “Come on inside, we’ll talk about this over some coffee.” He turned to his two students. “You two just sit tight. Don’t even think of using any magic until I get back!” With that, they stepped inside, while Gemini and Nel sat next to the house wall.

After a few minutes of doing nothing, followed by a few more minutes of doing nothing, Nel finally turned to Gemini. “Want to try to break the bottles?”

“…Are you sure about this?” asked Gemini. He knew his ass was on the line this time. “Maybe we should-”

“Come on, we’ll be careful,” said Nel. “Just use a little burst, and they’ll only shatter a few inches.”

Finally, Gemini caved in. “Fine, let’s give it a shot. I’ll go first.” He raised his hands and folded them into a square, centering it over the centermost beer bottle. He closed his eyes, trying to focus only a small amount of energy into his spell. Finally, he released what he had gathered…

MEANWHILE, INSIDE THE MARTINEZ RESIDENCE…

Wil and Galloway leaned over a series of superhero car types. “Now you see, the basic Batmobile style should serve you fine,” said Wil.

“I was thinking more along the lines of something with flight,” said Galloway. “Only a few of us have that power, and there’s not enough room in the bunker for a whole fleet of things.”

“We could always go with the Fantasticar model,” said Wil. “Still, even something as lame as a Battle-van will be helpful, considering-” A loud crash was heard in the back yard, followed by a high-pitched scream. “WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?!”

The two rushed into the back yard, and saw Nel covering her face, several glass shards embedded in her face. Several more were embedded into the wall, and a few made their way onto Gemini’s palms. Wil’s familial instincts kicked in, causing him to use the regular parental response: absolute panic. Galloway, meanwhile, ran back into the house to call for an ambulance, while Gemini simply stared in horror.

AN HOUR LATER, AT THE HOSPITAL…

Galloway and Gemini sat in the hospital waiting room, while Wil, Nel, and Nel’s family remained in one of the rooms. There were only a few magazines to read, and since all were in spanish, the two simply stared ahead. “I really screwed up this time,” said Gemini.

“It was an accident,” said Galloway. “As…unfortunate as it may be, I’m sure Wil and his family are completely understanding people and will gladly forgive you.”

Suddenly, Wil stormed into the waiting room. Gemini didn’t even bother to make eye contact. “How is she?”

“She’s going to be fine,” said Wil. “They had to perform surgery, but they fortunately still had a few elixers from my superhero days, so there’s no permenant damage.”

“That’s good to hear,” said Galloway.

“There is one more thing,” said Wil. “Gemini, you are no longer my student. Please leave with your brother.”

Both brothers jumped to their feet. “What?!” shouted Gemini.

“Look, I know my brother made a serious mistake,” said Galloway. “But that’s no reason to-”

“Galloway, you know your brother isn’t exactly a fast learner,” said Wil. “I’m having to hold Nel back because you can’t even grasp the concept of restraint! I’m through teaching a dangerous little retard like you!”

The next image Wil saw was Galloway’s fist flying to his face, followed by the saiyan growing farther away as he sailed down the hospital hallway, smashed through the wall, and crahsed into a wire fence. Galloway angrily marched to the dazed Wilfredo, more pissed off than could possibly be good for Wil’s health. “Look, I’m sorry about Nelimar, but nobody calls my brother a retard, BUT ME!”

“Your brother is an immature menace,” said Wil. “He could have killed Nel!”

“Maybe,” said Galloway, “but he didn’t. Just know that from this day on, we are no longer friends, or partners, or anything else that’s even remotely positive! We are MORTAL ENEMIES!” With that, he marched to Gemini, grabbed his brother by the arm, and flew off. Meanwhile, Gemini looked back at the recovering Wil, trying to process what had just happened.

(to be continued)

Nex time: The Task Force shows up! Plus…the real threat surfaces!

45

OH NOES! NOT MORTAL ENEMIES!

munches popcorn

46

THAT NIGHT, AT THE GALLOWAY RESIDENCE…

Galloway and Gemini sat in Galloway’s room, which had not been touched in the last several weeks. Gemini continued to look through his spell book, while Galloway looked up possible models for the Task Force Mobile. “So, what are you going to do now?” asked Galloway.

“Probably look to change classes again,” said Gemini. “Do you think Weiila needs a student?”

“Don’t worry,” said Galloway. “I’m sure you learned enough to study by yourself. Just try to stay home for a while. Mom and Dad have already been riding my butt about my choice in career; I don’t need them going on about you every day and night.”

Gemini smiled. “Are you…worried about me?”

Galloway’s face immediately froze. “No! No! That’s all a lie! A horrible lie! May you be run over by an entire convoy of snowmobiles!” An uneasy pause followed. “Get some sleep, kid. I’m going to apologize to Wil and his family in the morning. Maybe I can get him to take you back.” He turned off his computer and climbed through his window. “I have to get back to the bunker before Pierson finishes off the sesame noodles.” With that, he flew off, leaving only Gemini in the room. Perhaps, there would be a silver lining to this all…

THE NEXT MORNING, AT THE TASK FORCE HQ…

Mabatsekker slowly lumbered out of bed, morning whiskey in his hand. He entered the door codes for the front door, revealing a recently-placed mailbox/newspaper box screwed into the side of the entrance. He slowly pulled the extra-large Sunday paper from the box, entered the bunker, and punched in the codes to close the door.

By this time, Galloway and demigod were also awake, watching TV on the computer screen. Mabat took a seat next to them, reading the paper all the while. Finally, Pierson and GG Crono joined them, having fallen asleep while counting the number of pieces of garlic bread they could eat before becoming violently ill. Sure enough, the previous night was yet another slow one.

Finally, Galloway climbed to his feet. “Sorry to run, all, but I’ve got to have a talk with Wil. See ya!” With that, he teleported out of the bunker…just as the Evil Space Ninjas jumped in from the ceiling, prepared to slice the Task Force apart with their laser-swords and explosive shuriken.

A SECOND LATER, IN PUERTO RICO…

Galloway suddenly appeared inside Wil’s house, floating immediately above Wil’s head. The mage rolled off his couch in preperation for the freefall, but none came; instead, Galloway simply continued to float in the air. “Sorry to disturb you, Wil, but I didn’t have the time to fly over.”

“What do you want?” asked Wil.

Galloway continued to float around the room. “I just wanted to apologize for last night. Is that such a surprise?”

“No, especially since I was right about your brother,” said Wil.

Galloway stopped floating around and landed on his feet. “Who said I was apologizing about my brother? I was sorry about slamming you through a wall! What you did to my brother was still cold and wrong!”

“He nearly ruined everything!” said Wil. “I wanted Nel to have some official training, something I never got. Instead, your brother blackmailed me into teaching both him AND Nel, and THEN went and sliced her face apart!”

“Last I heard, it was only a few stitches!” said Galloway. “It’s nothing an elixir won’t fix up! Besides, what if it wasn’t Gemini’s fault your niece couldn’t figure it out!”

“Nelimar is one of the brightest girls I know!” said Wil. “It’s a miracle Gemini’s brain can even function enough to carry himself around!”

“I can’t believe I apologized!” said Galloway. “You’re still the same goddamn stubborn idiot you’ve always been!”

“Get the hell out of my house!” said Wil. Galloway nodded angrily, slammed open the door, and walked out of the building, stopping only to blow another hole in Wil’s much-maligned wall. As Wil continued to fume, his phone began to ring, breaking him from his enraged trance and giving him even a tiny bit of purpose. “Hello?”

“Mr. Martinez,” said the voice on the other end. “This is Nel’s doctor. I…have some bad news. Your niece has been kidnapped.”

MEANWHILE, AT THE TASK FORCE HQ…

The last of the Evil Space Ninjas fell as Galloway teleported back into the bunker. The other Task Force members were obviously exhausted and battered, except for demigod. “What the hell’s going on?” asked GG Crono.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” said Galloway. “Now, who’s up for pie?”

MEANWHILE, IN A PUERTO RICO HOSPITAL…

Wil joined the police in the room. Besides the fact that Nel’s bed was empty, and a note was in her place, everything seemed completely undisturbed. “Whoever did this is plenty good,” said one officer. “He managed to evade security, grab the girl, and leave without making a sound.”

“Any idea how he did this?” asked Wil.

“There were no fingerprints,” said another officer, “but we found a small amount of liquid on the pillow. We think it’s chloroform.”

“…Okay,” said Wil. Already an idea began to form in his mind, but he quickly pushed it out. He walked to the window, noticing the freshly disturbed dust. As he looked at the window frame itself, he saw fresh, flat marks on the right end of the frame; whoever did this had pried his or her way inside, drugged Nel, and slipped back out. He looked at the ground below him, and saw only a small bit of grass; there were no bushes or other obvious noise makers to alert anyone.

Finally, Wil returned to the note. It was a finely written piece of work, all right:

“Wilfredo Martinez, you have ruined my life. Every breath you take from this moment on is an afront to all that is good and decent in this world. You have exactly 24 hours to give yourself to me, or your beloved niece will be given back a piece at a time. -JFG”

That was all he needed to know. He angrily crumpled the note in his hand, his face blushing with madness. “Call Nel’s parents back,” he said. “Tell them Nel’s going to be back in time for lunch.”

(to be continued)

47

MEANWHILE, AT THE TASK FORCE HQ…

The entire Task Force sat at the kitchen table, several plates of chocolate cream pie in front of them. “Man, is there anything greater than chocolate cream pie?” asked Galloway.

“Not really,” said Mabat. “Now, will you PLEASE tell us what the hell happened?”

“Okay, fine,” said Galloway. “You remember my idiot of a brother? Well, yesterday he accidentally injured Wil’s niece, Nelimar. Now Wil’s on the warpath, Gemini’s been cut loose, and I’m just waiting for the right chance to kill him.” The rest of the Task Force simply stared on in silence. “NOW do you see why I wanted pie?”

“Shouldn’t this be between Gemini and Nelimar?” asked Pierson. “Is this really the only issue at hand here?”

“That’s really none of your business,” said Galloway. “Can someone PLEASE pass the ketchup?”

Just as the entire force was going to respond with disgust at ketchup on pie, a blast of light emerged from behind Galloway. The force turned to the light, and saw Wilfredo standing there, still recovering from his teleportation spell. After several uncomfortable minutes, Wil finally spoke. “Galloway, where is Gemini?”

Galloway shrugged. “Today’s Sunday, so he’s not at school. Besides that, I have no idea what he does all day. What’s it to you?”

Wil handed Galloway the kidnapper’s note. “Nel was just kidnapped. The initials on the note are you brother’s, aren’t they? And whoever managed to break in had to have the skills of a ninja. Ring any bells?”

Galloway looked at the note, seemingly taking in every single aspect of its origin, writing, everything. He then handed the note back to Wil. “And just how long did it take you to reach this conclusion?”

“To be honest, I suspected it once the police described the scene,” said Wil. “The note only confirmed them. Now, where the hell is he?”

Galloway jumped from his seat, barely controlling the urge to slam the chair across Wil’s head. “Look, you bastard! I’ve had just enough of you and your damn attitude!”

“Boys, boys!” said GG Crono. “Can you PLEASE take it outside? We’re trying to enjoy a nice pie here!”

“You treacherous bastard!” said Galloway.

“You ignorant brute!” said Wilfredo.

“That is it,” said demigod. “I am sick and tired of having pie time disturbed. You two, go outside if you’re going to fight!”

“Fine by me,” said Wil.

“Let’s do it,” said Galloway.

A MINUTE LATER, IN DOWNTOWN RPGC…

Galloway came slamming down hard, crashing into the middle of the street. Wil teleported in next to him, levitated him with a float spell, and blasted him further into the air with a large Force Bolt. Galloway screamed all the way until he crashed onto the roof of the RPGCTV Building, just as the rooftop’s cannon fired once again.

Meanwhile, Wil teleported onto the roof, only to find Galloway gone. He looked aorund in absolute confusion, but saw nothing. Finally, he looked up…just as Galloway’s foot came crashing down, knocking Wil down several stories into the building. Galloway quickly flew down after him, reaching Wil just as the mage was begining to stand. As he began to grab the mage by the neck, Wil quickly used a blind spell, sending Galloway crumbling to the floor covering his eyes.

As Wil leaned in for the kill, he suddenly stopped. A few seconds later began to smile, and then chuckle, and finally doubled over in laughter. Galloway slowly recovered his vision, seeing Wil laughing over his formerly stunned body. “Don’t you get it?” gasped Wil. “This whole thing…it’s so pointless! We’re just…waisting our time like a superhero crossover!”

Unfortunately, reasoning was never Galloway’s strong suit. “You-You’re laughing at me!” He powered up a Kaioken times 12 and punched Wil through the side of the building. He then charged forward to finish Wil off, only to be blasted with a combination of a fireball and a magic missile. Wil warped to the ground Galloway had slammed into, taking note of the saiyan’s unconscious form.

MEANWHILE, AT THE HOSPITAL…

A scream echoed from above, gradually growing louder until Gemini slammed through the ceiling, leaving a Gemini-shaped crater in the ground. After a few seconds of mass confusion, the dual class black mage-ninja rose from the pit he had just created to meet the confused crowd. “Nothing to worry about, folks. Just remember to never travel through cannon!”

Before anyone could stop him, he made his way to Nel’s room, only to find it empty. He turned to a passing security guard. “Excuse me. Has this patient been released?”

“No, she’s been kidnapped,” said the guard. Gemini’s eyes bulged open. “Mr. Martinez thinks it’s some former student of his…a ‘JF Gemini’ or something.” Gemini’s jaw dropped open. “By the way, who are you?”

“Uh…my name is…uh…Bill…Buckner,” said Gemini.

“Well, it’s an honor to meet you, Mr. Buckner,” said the guard. He continued on his way, allowing Gemini to enter the room itself. He made his way to the window, taking note of the marks on the frame. He then examined the ground leading to the bed, and finally at the bed itself. He shook his head sadly; there was no way he was going to find anything to locate Nel.

Suddenly, he felt something begin to approach him from the window. The door slammed shut, as someone locked and blocked the door from outside. Gemini ducked next to the window, pulling out a retractable baton from his backpack. A figure pushed open the window and climbed through, clad completely in black and holding a large crowbar. Before he could move very far, Gemini slammed him across the back of the head with the baton. However, the blow sent the figure to the floor but not enough with enough force to knock him unconscious.

The figure turned over to face his attacker, and both shared a communal gasp. Gemini recognized a small symbol on the intruder’s uniform as being an eye, the clan symbol for those employed by “The Eye.” Meanwhile, the attacker recognized Gemini as the boy who dared to betray the ninja. Both knew this would end with one of them dead…

(to be continued)

48

MEANWHILE, IN THE TASK FORCE HQ…

The remaining four members of the Task Force finished the last of the pie, including what was left of Galloway’s piece. “Well, that was a nice break,” said GG Crono. “Now how about stopping those two before they kill someone, worst of all each other.”

“Sounds like a plan,” said Pierson. “But first, we need to finish sorting our case files. Let them learn their lesson the hard way.”

MEANWHILE, IN THE STREETS OF DOWNTOWN RPGCITY…

Wil slowly walked to Galloway, who was lying half-dead in the pit. “I already checked, and nobody was seriously injured,” said Wil. “We got lucky. This whole thing was a complete waste of time.” Galloway only grumbled a small reply. “Now, are you going to tell me where your brother is, or do I have to beat you some more?”

Galloway muttered another reply, and Wil jumped into the pit and lowered a healing potion to Galloway’s lips. After a few seconds, Galloway’s wounds closed and his burns subsided, but there were still a few obviously broken bones, along with a great deal of pain and agony. “Now, Galloway, where is your brother?”

Suddenly, Galloway’s cell phone, which had somehow managed to stay completely unharmed throughout the whole ordeal, began to vibrate and belt out a badly-synthesized show tune. Growling and groaning in absolute pain, Galloway reached into his pocket and handed the phone to Wil. Reluctantly, Wil flipped the phone opened and answered. “Uh…hello?”

“Wil? What gives? I was calling my brother?”

“GEMINI!” shouted Wil. “Where the hell is Nel?”

“Why are you asking me that? Anyway, I just had a run-in with an old acquantince of mine, a Clan Eye ninja. Do you know anything about them?”

“They’re the main assassination and reconnaisance arm of ‘The Eye,’ a vast group of smugglers and arms dealers,” said Wil. He slowly began to stand, realization slowly hitting him. “Where’d you run into him?”

“I was trying to apologize to Nel. That ninja snuck in while I was still looking at the room. Fortunately, he was too afraid to fight, ran back outside, and was run over by a car. There was a note you might be interested in…”

“WHAT?!” shouted Wil.

“No need to shout! It’s a ransom note; apparantly, the kidnapper wants you to go to the island the metahumans were being kept on, or Nelimar dies at noon.”

“…Thanks, Gemini,” said Wil. “I’ll give Nel your apology.” He hung up the phone and gave it back to Galloway. “Uh…sorry about that, man. Come on, let’s get you to the Task Force HQ.”

AN HOUR LATER, AT THE PRISON ISLAND…

Wilfredo Martinez piloted his small craft to the island’s docks. Once he was sure it wasn’t an ambush, he climbed off the boat, staff and spells readied. Strangely enough, the steps leading up to the prison were completely unguarded; there weren’t even any sentries in the towers. When he tried the doors, he found them completely unlocked. In fact, if it wasn’t for the fact that the Nukleoids and PC Glenton were interred here, the entire facility would seem abandoned.

Suddenly, the thought of Nel being amongst these monsters rang alarm bells in his head. Now filled with more vigor, Wil stepped into the prison courtyard, taking note of just how empty the entire thing was. He then kicked the double doors to the prison cell blocks open, alerting everyone inside that he was there. A voice boomed over the loudspeaker. “Wilfredo Martinez, you’ve come just as I expected. We’ll meet you in Cell Block A.”

Cursing the kidnapper under his breath, Wil made his way to Cell Block A, where gangsters and drug smugglers were formerly kept, before the prison was reformatted to suit metahumans. On a raised platform at the end of the block, Nelimar was tied to the ceiling, her body completely covered with yellow rope. Next to her, a gun raised to her head, was…the prison warden. “Warden?” said Wil.

“I have a name,” said the warden. “It’s Joan Francine Gulliver. Just because you didn’t bother to learn it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t call me by my real name.”

“Okay, what the heck is this about?” asked Wil.

“You and your metahuman friends ruined everything,” said the warden. “The Eye was paying me quite nicely to keep these freaks under control. And what do you do? You just come up, act all nice, and then BREAK THEM OUT! I was barely able to escape alive!”

“You mean…you were working for ‘The Eye’ the whole time?” said Wil.

“Don’t you get it?” said the warden. “They wanted the superbeings banned so they could monopolize the market! We would have made a killing on the black market with these beings! And what now? You and your buddies opened registration again! You ruined the chance of a lifetime?!”

Wil’s eyes narrowed. Despite his massive dislike for…Joan, he had always thought she was honest. Now he knew everything… “What do you want?”

The warden turned her gun towards Wil. “Revenge. Your life for your niece. This could have ended a LOT quicker, but that blasted student of yours got in the way!”

Suddenly, an ice bolt flew from the shadows, turning the gun to ice. The warden, Wil and Nel looked around in confusion as the gun shattered. Meanwhile, a massive explosion erupted across one of the walls, as the RPGC Task Force rushed inside. As if to accomidate this change, Eye Clan ninjas dropped from the ceiling, weapons raised. The two sides met in a massive battle, while Wil warped past the warzone and teleported to the catwalk. The warden removed a baton from her back and pressed a switch, stretching out the two ends into a staff.

As the battle continued to rage, a shadowy figure stepped from the darkness, approached Nel, pulled out a pocket knife, and cut the ceiling rope loose. Nel hit the ground hard, but seemed to be all right, and everyone else was too busy to notice her. Meanwhile, the battle against the ninjas began to progress in favor of the Task Force, while the fight between Wil and the warden continued to be a stalemate.

The shadowy figure lifted the confused Nel, who continued to mutter beneath her gag, and the figure began to skulk back towards the back exit. Suddenly, the final Eye Clan ninja hurtled towards the platform and slammed into the figure, knocking both it and Nel to the ground. A pure-black cloak fell off the figure, revealing the figure of a battered Gemini.

Wil’s eyes suddenly opened wide, allowing the warden to sneak in an attack on the back on his legs. The mage fell to the ground, and the warden moved in for the kill. Fortunately, however, the Task Force managed to make their way up the platform and tackled the warden. As she lay there, Wil, Gemini, and a fully untied Nel approached her.

“You are a discrace to your already-discraced profession,” said Wil. “I probably should snap your neck right now, but that would be an affront to everything superheroes represent. Instead…” He turned to Galloway. “Could you please snap both her legs?”

“With pleasure,” snickered Galloway.

A FEW MINUTES LATER…

The Task Force, Wil, Nel, and Gemini assembled on Wil’s boat, as it roared back to the mainland. “So, that’s it, then?” asked Pierson.

“We need to head to a hospital,” said Wil. “We need to make sure Nel is all right.”

“Actually, I’m fine,” said Nel.

“And what about Gemini?” asked Galloway. “Is he back with you?”

“…Actually, I think I have an idea,” said Wil.

Suddenly, a piece of wood came out of nowhere and stabbed Galloway in the back. “…Set course for a hospital,” he said, before falling unconscious.

LATER, AT THE TASK FORCE HQ…

Wil stood in front of the command room’s broom closet, which was fortunately rather empty at the time, a spell book in his hands. He continued to mutter an alien series of words and phrases, as the broom closet began to progressively glow brighter and brighter. Finally, the entire closet was filled with a swirling blue portal. The Task Force oooed and awwed behind the mage as he closed the spell book.

“Well, that’s that,” said Wil. “Now, where’s the guest of honor?”

Gemini came shambling out the back, clad in his usual ninja uniform/black mage robes and straw hat. In one hand he carried a metal rod, and a bag of holding was slung over his shoulder. “All right,” said Wil. “You remember everything I told you?”

“Yes, just stick to the dimensions you went to on your journey, and don’t enter the fanfiction multiverse,” said Gemini. “I think I can remember all that.”

“A good trip around the multiverse will do you good,” said Wil. “With any luck, you’ll have some sense of competence when you get back.”

Gemini walked over to Galloway, who didn’t even bother to look at him. After a few cold seconds, Gemini moved towards the portal and slowly stepped through vanishing as he did so. A few minutes after he had dissapeared completely, Wil raised his hands, and the portal closed.

“Well, that’s that,” said Wil. “Now who’s up for-” The sight of Galloway’s maniacal stare quickly shut the mage up. “Anyway, I’m going to hurry along now. Nel needs to be trained and all.” With that, the mage warped out of the bunker.

“…Come on,” said Galloway. “We have stuff to do.”

MEANWHILE, AT THE DOCKS…

A small chest on Wil’s boat opened, revealing the form of PC Glenton. Smiling at the luck of his escape, he snuck out of the docks and made his way into the heart of RPGCity.

THE END OF ISSUE 4

Next time: The Government takes control of the story, and turns it into a strange morality play! Stay tune for our first multi-issue storyline!

49

I can almost imagine the five running and yelling in unison as they tackle the warden. adds that to his projects to draw

50

Issue 5: Back to School Special aka You Should Have Known This Was Coming

ONE WEEK BEFORE THE FEUD…

Pierson was enjoying a fine meal of cold cereal and milk when Galloway came rushing in. “Hey! My research grant just came in!”

Pierson looked at him with a gaze that combined confusion and bewilderment. “What? How the hell did you get a research grant?”

“I managed to impress some big wigs in the Pentagon with the Flying Bunker,” said Galloway. “And after a few blackmail threats, I managed to get them to finance my newest invention!”

“And what would that be?” asked Pierson.

“None of your business,” said Galloway. “Well, so long!” Galloway rushed into the small arms depot they had turned into a lab, while Pierson suddenly got a knot of fear in his stomach.

A DAY AFTER THE FEUD…

Galloway and GG Crono entered the lab, a small room filled with computers, work benches, toolkits, and empty Diet Coke cans. A large object in the back was covered with a white sheet, except for several large wires that ran into the computers. “So that’s the big invention?” asked GG Crono.

“Sure is,” said Galloway. He made his way to one of the computer consoles. “It’s still far from perfect, but-”

Suddenly, the power in the room went off, trapping everything in pure blackness. Since the doors were also electric, there was no way to leave the room. After a few seconds of stilled breathing and general yo-yoing, the lights came back on…revealing that the invention had vanished. “No!” shouted Galloway. “It’s still not fixed! WHAT HAS SCIENCE DONE?!”

A FEW DAYS LATER, AT A RANDOM SUBURBAN HOUSE…

Mr. and Mrs. O’Toole sat in their living room, watching the evening news, while little Timmy O’Toole sat in his bedroom, supposedly doing his second grade homework. The parents continued to talk about stupid, idiotic things; it wasn’t until two hours later that they realized things were very quiet in their son’s room. Finally, they decided to slowly open the door.

Lying on a bed was their son’s dead body, a large needle filled with green liquid stuck in his veins.

THE NEXT MORNING…

“…This marks the twelth drug-related death in the student body of RPGCity Elementary School. Heaven’s Soldier has stated that they have no idea what drugs go into the identified concoction, but he swears that there will soon be breaks in the case.”

Galloway turned off the TV, and the rest of the Task Force breathed a sigh of relief. “This is just screwed up,” said Mabatsekker.

“We need to bring this drug problem down,” said Galloway. “Does anyone have any idea how to do this?”

“None whatsoever,” said demigod. “Still, we must-”

Suddenly, the lights went off again. When they turned on an hour later, Galloway was holding a bunch of documents, his clothes messed up, the back of his neck sore from blackjack blows. “What the hell just happened?” said GG Crono.

“Turns out the US Government has taken an interest in us,” said Galloway. “They want us to deal with the drug problem, and do it in such a way that it can later be transformed into the worst kinds of comic books: public announcement freebies.”

“…Doesn’t sound too hard,” said Pierson. Then the knot of fear returned. “So…how are we going to do this?”

“The government stole and modified my invention,” said Galloway. “Unfortunately, according to the government specifications, we need three people, and I’m not going to reduce us to two members. We need a third wheel…”

Suddenly, someone knocked on the bunker’s door. Galloway punched in the open codes, and the doors slid open, revealing the angelic form of Weiila, holding a small fruit basket. Galloway’s eyes immediately glazed over; he knew this wasn’t going to end well. “Hello,” said Weiila. “I heard you guys were moving in, so I thought I’d bring over a housewarming gift.”

“Of course,” said Mabat. “Please, come in!” Weiila quickly stepped inside, while Galloway continued to stand completely frozen. Finally, GG Crono moved towards Galloway. “Hey! We just talked to Weiila! She said she’d like to help!” Galloway then fell to the ground, his body still frozen. “Uh…Galloway? What the hell…”

“Crono,” said Galloway, “get Weiila. I need to talk to her.”

A FEW MINUTES LATER, IN THE LAB…

Galloway and Weiila sat on chairs across from each other. “Okay, what the hell is this all about?” asked Weiila.

“Weii, there’s a small problem,” said Galloway. “I thought they wanted us to enter as teachers or administrators or something. Then they told me about the modifications to my invention.”

“What…invention?” said Weiila. She had a horrible idea where this was going.

“I was working on a new stasis field device,” said Galloway. “It was a projection ray, capable of freezing objects in time and space for as long as it was powered. Unfortunately, the genius of such a device was lost on such idiots, so…they turned it into a time-matter antineutronic device.”

Weiila didn’t speak technobabble, but now he KNEW where this was going. “Let me guess…you want me to…”

“I didn’t want you in this at all,” said Galloway. “Still, it seems fate has conspired against us all. You WILL be well-rewarded for your services, if you help us.”

The two exited the lab, Galloway now owing Weiila five times his life savings. The Task Force (plus Weiila) gathered in the kitchen for a team meeting. “All right,” said Galloway. “Following government specifications, we are to use the time-matter antineutronic device to infiltrate RPGCity Elementary as students, and then-”

“Wait, wait, wait,” said Mabat. “Did you say…as students?”

“Well…yeah,” said Galloway.

“Are you SURE you didn’t make up this plan yourself?” asked GG Crono.

“No, of course I didn’t!” said Galloway. “But shut up and listen! We need two of you to join Weiila in the operation. One of us will pose as a parent, and the other two will mostly make city patrols and investigate normally. Hopefully, we can find whoever is getting this stuff together and beat him down quickly.”

“And what if we refuse?” asked demigod.

“Then we end up in an unconstitutional prison camp somewhere in Cuba,” said Galloway.

After that, nobody rose to object. “Alright then,” said Galloway. “Our first order of business is to decide…who goes under the beam?”

MEANWHILE, IN THE RPGCITY SLUMS…

PC Glenton cautiously entered the Barrel’s End Bar and Grill, his stomach practically turning at having to deal with such a place. The sheer filth of the area, accompanied by the disgusting denizens, practically sent him gagging for his life. Finally, he regained his composure, and took a seat at a table in a dark corner.

Sure enough, a grey figure surrounded by smoke approached him. The haze was so thick, Glenton was completely unable to tell who it was. “Do you have what I requested?” asked the figure, its voice heavy and distorted.

Glenton raised a small bag. “It’s in here.” The figure took the bag and handed Glenton a briefcase, filled with cash. “Is this the eighty million?”

“Yes,” said the figure. “But if you’re interested, I can double the amount…” He slammed what looked like a hand on the top of the briefcase, nearly chopping off Glenton’s fingers in the process. “I need you to strike Little Sally Pharmacutical. A list of your targets will be available in your mailbox within the hour. Take it or leave it.”

With that the figure vanished in a massive puff of smoke. Although still unsure about what just happened, Glenton grabbed the briefcase and worked his way out of the bar, ready for the figure’s next high-paying assignment.

(to be continued)

51

You just HAD to work in something that had the possibility of turning Weiila into a kid in there, didn’t you? DIDN’T YOU?!

munches happily on pie Damn, that’s some good pie.

52

MEANWHILE, IN A BITTER SNOWSTORM OFF THE COAST OF GREENLAND…

Several scientists, clad in polar suits, made their way through a massive metal door and into an underground laboratory, inside of which sat several massive glass tubes, all connected to a large mainframe. “Is the project ready?” asked one scientist.

“Not yet,” said another. “But soon.”

MEANWHILE, AT THE RPGC TASK FORCE HQ…

Finally, it was reduced to drawing straws. Only Galloway was exempt, since he was the only one who knew how to operate the machine. After the straws were all pulled, the Task Force realized they had forgotten to cut two, and had to start over. The second time, GG Crono and Pierson were the unlucky recipients. With the affair settled, Galloway and demigod quickly named Mabatsekker the fake parent, and ran to get the machine.

AN HOUR LATER, INSIDE THE RPGC TASK FORCE’S LAB…

Galloway finally finished the last systems scan on his modified stasis field generator. Sure enough, whoever had programmed this device knew what they were doing: everything checked out perfectly. Of course, there was always the chance for unseen error, but considering the noose the government had over all of RPGC, he didn’t really have much of a say in the matter.

Now as satisfied as he could be, he wheeled the device out to the front of the bunker. Meanwhile, GG Crono, Pierson and Weiila kneeled on a padded mat, while Mabat and demigod passed out pure-black goggles. “Are these really necessary?” asked Mabat.

“Only if you want to see again,” said Galloway. Once everyone had their goggles on, Galloway turned to Mabat. “Are you ready?”

“Actually, demigod and I are headed to the RPGCPD Station,” said Mabat. “We’re going to see what Heaven’s Soldier can tell us.” With that, they hurried out the door, desperate to escape what was to come. Galloway, meanwhile, began to sweat visibly; the thought of being with three VERY vengeful kids with adult minds was NOT high on his list of priorities.

“What’s wrong?” sneered Weiila. “Afraid of a bunch of punk kids?”

“You know, this happens WAY too often,” sighed Galloway. “I mean, it was sick comically funny at first, but now it’s just stupid!” A warning sniper shot quickly deflated his rising argument. “…But hey, what’s the harm of one more time?”

Galloway moved to the other side of the stasis ray, pressed a few buttons, and pushed forward a lever. The machine buzzed to life, and a crackling blast of light emerged from the ray, blasting the three helpless hostages. The entire bunker was awash in light, along with most of the mountainside.

MEANWHILE, AT THE RPGCPD STATION…

Mabatsekker and demigod entered the station, while Heaven’s Soldier continued to pound away on paperwork, Pokefreak played a game of Quake II, and Fou-lu chowed away on some old chinese take-out. “Ah, if it isn’t the great RPGC Task Force?” asked Heaven’s Soldier.

“Cut the sarcasm,” said Mabat. “We need any info you have on the drugs, how they’re distributed, or who’s behind this all.”

“There’s not much,” said Fou-lu. “The drugs rot the brain and heart at the same time, and then spread out to the rest of the body. The victim is dead within seconds of injection.”

“Could this be the work of drug dealers?” asked demigod.

“Most likely,” said Pokefreak. “The question is, just who is doing this?”

“We’ll give you any evidence we have,” said Heaven’s Soldier. “Just…beat this guy down hard, will ya?”

A FEW MINUTES LATER, AT THE TASK FORCE HQ…

Mabat and demigod opened the front door, only to find Galloway hanging upside down from the ceiling, a spiked death trap constructed from silverware and broken glass immediately beneath him. On the support beam above him, a seven-year-old GG Crono, Pierson and Weiila were lying about, holding a pair of garden shears to the rope. “…You got caught this quickly?” asked Mabat.

“Just shut up and get me down from here,” said Galloway.

“Hey, Gallo!” said Weiila. “Feeling faint yet?”

“Not enough to strangle you when I get down!” said Galloway.

“Did you hear that?” cooed Pierson. “I think he’s trying to threaten us!”

Mabat sighed. “Kids, get down from there this instant!”

“Says who?” said GG Crono.

“So says the man who knows almost every ability you have ever had,” said demigod. “Now, release Galloway!”

“Ok, we’ll let him down!” shouted Weiila. She raised the shears and snapped them together, cutting the rope. At last, Galloway plummeted to his deserved doom…for a few seconds. Afterwards, he changed directions in mid-air and flew up to the beam, surprising the three kids. “…Oh right, forgot you could fly.”

“Mabat, they’re all yours,” said Galloway. “I’m going to go on patrol with demigod. While I’m gone, I expect them to clean up this mess!” With that, Galloway landed next to demigod and joined him out of the bunker, while the three kids climbed down from the beam and stood in front of Mabat. For the first time, they noticed just how much huger he was at the moment.

“You…aren’t going to make us clean this up, are you?” asked Pierson.

“On the contrary,” said Mabat. “You’re not only going to take out that deathtrap, but you’re going to wipe down every square inch of this HQ!”

“But why?” whined Weiila.

“Because, as much as he deserved it, you guys tried to kill Galloway,” said Mabat. “This is the RPGC Task Force version 3, not a bunch of Punishers or Golden Age Supermans! Now get your rags and start scrubbing!”

(to be continued)

53

I warn you, I was reeeally obnoxious as a kid!

54

I didn’t originally plan to use Weiila at all. In fact, this story was supposed to occur a long time from now, and involve the entire Task Force being turned into kids accidentally by PC Glenton. Fortunately, I ditched that storyline, and instead focused on a single story like this.

Besides, it’ll hopefully turn out better than previous fics. AND Galloway gets exactly what he deserves at every turn.

55

“Mr. Tsekker, first of all why is your hair blue? It must be a clear contrast to how you smell like booze and your kids act like little monsters. You punk generation parents really cannot raise children…” “Oh shut up and blame it on MY parents.”

56

Ok… d and Wil write me better then I write me…

sigh. I feel so inferior…

57

A FEW HOURS LATER…

Pierson, GG Crono, and Weiila stood in front of a reclining Mabatsekker, their oversized clothes and entire bodies covered in dirt and grime. “We just finished,” said GG Crono. “Can we PLEASE wash up now?”

Mabat looked around the bunker. Sure enough, the walls and floor were practically reflective, while the lights shined brighter than ever before. Even the computer was cleaned, given a full virus and spyware scan, and updated to the fullest extent possible. Mabat smiled. “Sure, knock yourself out. But remember who’s boss from now on!”

“Oh, come on!” said Weiila. “You know we’re-”

“You’re going into a sting operation,” said Mabatsekker. “We can’t just treat you life adults and leave it at that. When you go into the field, you NEED to behave like seven-year-olds, or whoever’s behind this is going to figure something’s wrong and ruin everything. Understand?”

“…How the hell did you know all that?” asked Pierson.

“I read through the case files,” said Mabat. “Now, wash yourself up. We need to go over the game plans for next week.”

“You mean…we’re stuck like this for over a week?” asked Weiila. “What did I do to deserve this?”

“Hell if I know,” said Mabat. “Now, MARCH!” Cursing and grumbling under their breath, the three children marched to the showers. Almost the instant the door closed, the front door to the bunker opened, revealing the exhausted forms of Galloway and demigod. “What the hell happened to you?”

The two stepped into the Task Force HQ as the door closed behind them. “A bunch of punk street gangs decided to start a war,” said Galloway. “We had to shut them down.”

“There were several fatalities,” said demigod. “I doubt they shall be missed, but Galloway must get to work on the paperwork. In the meantime, we finished the shopping you asked for.” The cloaked being revealed several clothes bags he had previously been hiding.

“Also, we needed to discuss living arrangements,” said Mabatsekker. “We can’t just let Weiila go home now; she needs to stay here until we return her to normal. And…well, I already promised her a room…”

A MINUTE LATER…

“You put her in my bedroom?!” shouted Galloway.

“It makes sense,” said Mabat. “After all, this is all your fault.”

“Damnit, will people stop blaming ME for this?!” shouted Galloway. “Do you want to end up in an oil barrel like the REAL Ronald Reagan?”

Suddenly, Weiila approached the room, clad in a bathrobe and nightgown. “Gallo, if it wasn’t for your little invention, we wouldn’t be having this problem, so just SHUT UP and live with it, okay?”

Galloway sneered at Weiila, before smiling. “Ah, how can I argue with someone as cute as you?” Weiila growled at her tormentor, and then entered his former bedroom. “…Well, who’s up for Scrabble?”

MEANWHILE, IN UPTOWN RPGCITY…

Now hiding in his other luxury suite, PC Glenton went over the blueprints for his next target. When compared with his sattelite photos of guard patrols, he saw that the room where the chemicals were stashed was heavily guarded, save for a single weak point in the roof. With that knowledge in mind, he made his way to his supply closet, which was stashed with thief tools, guns, ammo, explosives, and a broom.

After arming himself with the items he needed, he prepared to strike in the morning, where the guard patrols were lessened. Then, perhaps, he would finally be wealthy enough to leave this worsening town, before the RPGC Task Force took over completely.

(to be continued)

58

THE NEXT DAY…

Mabat’s voice raged with the fury of a thousand blowhorns. “PIERSON! GG CRONO! WEIILA! TIME TO GET UP!” Galloway was the first to rise, the couch practically hurling him through the top of the hill. demigod was the next to arise; since the rest of the Task Force had never seen him sleep, however, it was uncertain just what he had been up to. After a few minutes of no motion from his targets, Mabatsekker walked to each individual room and kicked in the door, sending metal plowing five to ten feet into other metal. That noise was finally enough to rouse them from their slumber.

“Wha…huh?” mumbled GG Crono.

“It’s time to get to work!” said Mabat. “You’ve got a lot of sleuthing to do!”

“…But…I thought school…” stammered Weiila.

“It IS next week!” said Mabat. “Yesterday was Sunday, remember? Now get the hell up, before I send the next message via air-to-ground missile!” With that, he made his way to his own room to catch a half hour of sleep, while the kids ducked into the closets to get dressed. Galloway and demigod were sitting in the living room when the computer began to scream, “Alert! Alert!”

Cursing under his breath, Galloway turned on the machine. Sure enough, it showed an image of the Little Sally Pharmacutical Building, which had just been broken into. “Tell Mabat I’ll be back later,” said Galloway. “You stay here and help him prep those three.”

“But-” stammered demigod. Galloway, however, had already teleported out of the bunker, and was most likely flying as far away as possible. Meanwhile, the kids stumbled out of their rooms. Pierson was dressed in a long-sleeve green shirt with blue jeans, his eyes practically revealing his confusion and disgust with the outfit. GG Crono’s hair was plastered down with about two tons of hair gel, and he was dressed in a red tank top and dark brown shorts. Weiila, meanwhile, was dressed in a green t-shirt with a small angel on the center and a pair of khaki shorts, with her usual glasses firmly in place.

The very moment the kids had finished their usual cereal, Mabat left his room, dropping his catgirl porn magazine on the way past the doorway. “Come on, let’s get going!” he said.

“Just HOW are we going to get there?” asked Weiila.

“Galloway’s loaning us his car,” said Mabat. “It’s an ugly piece of crap, but it’ll get us there. Now get your stuff and move out!” demigod gave a small smile under his cloak; nothing could possibly get in the way of his relaxation…

A FEW MINUTES LATER, AT THE LITTLE SALLY PHARMACUTICAL BUILDING…

Galloway landed on the grey, lifeless building’s roof, taking an immediate interest in the large hole in the ceiling. It was perfectly round in shape, and completely groveless. There were a few metallic items lying to the side, but they were mostly scrap, the kind usually found after the use of a small explosive device. Once he was sure there was nothing left of interest on the roof, he jumped down the hole, landing right into the chemical storeroom.

All manners of fluids, powders, and unidentified substances filled the general area, covering hundreds of shelves and countless square feet of flooring. Several security guards were huddled by the door, forcing Galloway to sneak through the area, lest he be caught and questioned. Fortunately, after turning around a corner, he saw several empty shelves, all labelled. Perhaps these were what was stolen…

As he stepped closer, however, he heard a small beeping beneath his feet. A few seconds later, a massive explosion propelled Galloway back into one of the shelves and caused a great deal of beakers and vials to shatter, filling the room with vapors. Galloway’s concussion soon began to ebb with untold pain, as his veins began to pop out of his hands. Finally, his eyes closed, just as a bunch of lead-suited men rushed into the room…

MEANWHILE, IN THE GALLOWAY-MOBILE (AKA A RUN DOWN HYUNDAI ACCENT)

Mabat continued to drive down the streets of RPGCity, barely managing to keep on the road due to the horrible car. Weiila sat in the front seat, while Pierson and GG Crono sat in the back. “Scared yet?” said Mabat.

“What’s there to be scared about?” said Weiila. “We’re just going to share a room with a bunch of real seven-year-olds, all while looking for some guy to strike, and-” Her eyes suddenly bugged out, as did Pierson’s and GG Crono’s. “…I’m scared.”

“Just remember, act like your eight, at most,” said Mabat. “If you’re too smart, they’ll figure it out before you get a chance to hunt down the dealers. Act too dumb, and you’ll end up in the special classes, never to return again.”

Finally, they reached the front of the school. It was a tall, two-story, crumbling building, a black spot on the rest of the neighborhood. Kids were running to and fro, completely oblivious to the three kids and their strange father. The three kids gathered together, took a deep breath, and stepped into the school…

THE END OF ISSUE 5

Next issue: Things heat up as a vast conspiracy is exposed! Who is behind the drugs? And why is demigod suddenly becoming tight-lipped? And who shot JFK? Stay tuned for issue 6, “Tip of the Needle,” to find out! And remember, do what Mr. T says…

Mr. T: Stay in milk, don’t do school, and drink your drugs!

59

Mr. T knows all.

Can’t wait to see what horrible misfortunes you’ll inflict on us next!

60

As usual, your stories are whimsical and terribly erratic, and yet never cease to entertain.

Frankly, though, I am glad that Sir Percival has not been, is not and will never be a member of the RPGC Task Force…

taps on wood