By Phoenix Valkyrie
Part One: Enter the Heroes
It all started with a poster.
At this time in the semi-pleasant (though exceedingly cold) town of Giveaway, a ragtag team of “warriors” that includes a man with dragons fused to his back and a barrel obsession, a hyperactive teenager who was scarily good at making bombs, two people with six eyes between them, cat-eared boy prodigy, and the world of Nede’s first black belt reporter, are attempting to be cheerful. And warm. And succeeding at neither.
“Aww, come on, Ernest, it’s not that bad.”
“Darling, Ashton’s right. It’s not as bad as you think.”
“Ashton has a fire dragon attached to his back. I’m cold and this sucks.”
“Big Brother Ernest, people are staring at us.”
“You mean they’re staring at you, Leon. Why did Claude even let you come along? Where is he, anyway?”
“He’s with Rena! You forgot they got married, right?” Giggles from the teenager.
“Precis, shut up.” Ernest’s eyes (all three of them!) narrowed. “I find you even more annoying now that we’re no longer trying to save the Known Universe and your weapons were restricted under the Lacour Convention and countless development laws. Right now your only redeeming factor is that you no longer have any cause to shout ‘Hereeeeeee’s Mister Enemy!’ anymore.”
“Oh, come on, you two.” Chisato, the roving reporter with an eye for the bizarre and dangerous, spoke up. She had been annoyingly upbeat since she had finally written and published a book on how to deal with annoyingly upbeat people who have finally written and published a book. “It’s not really that cold, is it, Ernest?”
The response was immediate from everyone. “Shut. Up.” While this was not a method discussed in said book, it was effective. Chisato pouted and turned to the wall, which had the aforementioned Poster of Destiny upon it.
“Hey, look at this!”
Leon stood on a chair and glanced at the poster. “Do you like weapons, explosions, or things that blow up?”
((That is part one. If you all like it, I’ll put up part two later.))