First of all you could be making over 100k and raise your kid not be that way if you wanted to. And also 15k is not enough I’d say(by californian price standards). Being poor also causes fucked up kids. You can’t win. It doesn’t matter how much money you make, it’s how good a parent you are. I mean, people that make alot of money, spend more time amassing that money than being a good parent. So they make up for not spending time with them by giving them everything they want. and if you make too little your kids will probably get into stealing shit and drugs cuz you live in a shitty area surrounded by [strike]mexicans[/strike] unsavory types. really the best way to be a parent is to make just enough to pay all the bills and expenses, but have to save up for something big like a new washing machine and dryer. and work a 9-5 job 5 days a week and have a stay at home wife. the way jesus intended it in the 1950s.
You have to be makin 100k to have a stay at home wife nowadays. It’s not feasible. Unless you have a stay at home wife cleaning your studio apartment and making Ramen Casserole for dinner.
There’s no such thing as a stay at home wife anymore. A stay at home wife is a woman that cleans the house and prepares the food and makes sure her husband that works hard to support his family get at least fellatio every night he desires it.
Women now days are lazy good for nothings. “I made a baby, so you can do all the other shit too or I’ll divorce you and take half”
Charlemagne satirizes as always, but there’s a kernel of truth in it. There are still plenty of women who choose to be full-time homemakers/housewives, and generally speaking that’s the best way to raise children. So yes, if you can make a lot of money with one income you won’t need to worry about two incomes and you’ll have more time to spend with your children and more time to raise them properly.
Hades, making blanket statements like that isn’t very useful. It entirely depends on where you live. Canada has free health care, for example; in the States you’re going to need a hell of a lot more than 15K a year just to keep your insurance up. If you want a half-decent car (say a Civic, which is well-made but small) you’re going to pay at least $2-3000 per year in insurance. Houses in Toronto go for about $600,000 on the low end, whereas out in the suburbs you can probably get a comparable one for $2-300,000, so if you want one you’re going to be shelling out a lot in mortgage money. And if you don’t, you still might be paying $800-1000 a month in rent.
From what I’ve read so far, I see no real evidence to the contrary that’s she pregnant. So I think you’re really worrying over nothing. If she does become pregnant, then you worry your ass off. 
In that case, follow everyone else’s advice. I don’t feel like repeating what everyone else has already said.
Quite a wake-up call, don’t ya think?
Women now days are lazy good for nothings. “I made a baby, so you can do all the other shit too or I’ll divorce you and take half”
Prenup solves that. Unless you live in California. Then they have all sorts of other crap that figures into it.
And yeah, being a stay-at-home wife is fairly unrealistic nowadays, but I’ve seen quite a few around. Guess that happens when their husband makes big bucks, and they live in a $700k-1000k house. Living it up in their fancy gated communities and whatnot.
Where you live determines whether you can get away with 15k or 20. You don’t need a $700k house, ever. That’s one of the most irritating things about our society, people treat not having extreme luxury like it’s the most ridiculously absurd and unfair thing to ever be afflicted with. If you own even an average house in Toronto, you’re probably one the richest tenth of a percent of people on earth. A good 90% of kids are probably raised on way less than even I’m suggesting.
Having a car is not essential. That statement is probably completely outside the realm of believability for most of the people on these forums, which is also annoying. It’s very possible to get away with not owning one, kid or not. A lot of people I know do it by choice.
You can argue all you want that you need more money than I’d be happy with, but you’re never going to come up with a $30k list of needs for raising a kid, not without a lot of rich, spoiled, crybabyism.
Get this
Is that what they’re charging kids these days? :hahaha; Take the damn bus. I pay 800/yr - includes full glass!
I’d ask her to abort it, if in fact she has conceived. You’ll both get over it, and hopefully won’t make the same mistake again. Otherwise, enjoy paying child support until you’re 40, and know that after you break up, she will resent you and fuck you out of your money every chance she gets.
Is she covered by her parent’s insurance? Hospital bills can get rather expensive.
Or maybe you two are a match made in heaven and things will work out just fine. Statistically unlikely, but my parents have been together since they were 13 and are pushing 60 as an example…so all I can say is good luck.
I just began to understand what hades meant. And I apologize to you hades. It IS possible to raise a child with no money, no car, and no home. It just sucks.
Hades choice from behind a Rawlsian veil of ignorance would be to fuck over everyone.
You’ve already said it - there’s not really anything you can do now except wait. If she misses her period, well, then you two can go over your options then. Regardless, please consistently use the birth control, and be prepared for the consequences of your actions. I will hope for the best for both of you.
Stay-at-home moms? It seems like the real difference when it comes to income is when you’re talking about paying for daycare for more than one child. Would you rather live on one income and have one parent at home, or would you rather spend at least a sizable chunk of one parent’s income on daycare and not have that time with the children? Different strokes for different folks, I guess. I always planned on staying at home once I had a child (it feels like it’s turning into IF I have one at this point), at least until all the kids were in school. My mom did that for my brother and me and went to work part-time after both of us were in school, and I want to do the same and to enjoy the time I’d have with them while it’s there. You don’t have to be rich to have one parent at home - it’s choosing the material lifestyle you would like to have and choosing how much time you want to have with your children.
So basically one shouldn’t live in Toronto unless they’re rich? Urban societies in general cost more to live in, but that doesn’t mean no one should live here. For one thing, if everyone lived spread out, it’d be much more harmful to the environment as more land would be eaten up and more transportation would have to happen. In any case, what if one has family and friends in Toronto? They should move away just so that they refrain from being rich?
Living in Toronto without a car is almost impossible unless a) one has a crapload of spare time, or b) one lives and/or works right near the subway line. Toronto is one of the worst cities for transit. A trip that takes 20 minutes by car can easily take an hour or longer by subway. As for biking - OK for about five months a year, torture the rest of the time.
When it comes down to it, there’s a whole lot of simple things that cost a great deal of money and don’t fall into the “spoiled rich kid” category. Claiming that absolutely anyone can get by on 15K or even 30K is disingenuous. What if one wants to have more than one kid? Three kids eat up food, health care, transportation costs, etc.
Basically, stop assuming that everyone is going to live the lifestyle you have in mind.
I’m not assuming they are, but we’re talking about the needs of a child, not the ability to spoil a child, or many children. Everyone was acting like the guy would be completely fucked if his gf turned out to be pregnant and he didn’t ask for an abortion, just because he doesn’t have a college education. I’m merely calling bullshit on that. He’s not in a situation where he’s thinking about having tonnes of kids. He’s worried about one accidental pregnancy and telling him his only options are abortion or a wasted life is what’s disingenuous here. He’s going to be fine, stop trying to scare him.
It might be prudent for everyone’s sake if you explain the economics behind your $15k per year plan Hades.
To add on, there are also a larger quantity and wider variety of jobs in larger cities. Also jobs located in larger cities tend to come with a larger salary. Generally a job done in the city will pay a lot more then the exact same job done in a rural area or even an nearby town (of course the cost of living in rural areas is much lower, so it evens out).
To my understanding 15k can get you by in small US towns if you don’t have any medical expenses at all.
I was just commenting on your throwaway comment that anybody should be just fine on $15K a year, which is significantly below the poverty line (I believe it’s about $28,000 for a three-person household).
I’m guessing you mean Shin’s comment. =D
I was talking more about a one person home of course. I mostly just feel sorry for people who can’t get healthcare and have to pay thousands just to see a doctor for the most minor things.
If you worked minimum wage in the US, 40 hours a week, it would come to about 15K a year. I’m not sure what it is in Canada, but also remember we are looking at two different currencies and places of residence.
Raising a family on 15k a year in the US would be extremely hard without any government assistance.
The poverty line has nothing to do with the dictionary definition of poverty. A $28k salary makes you pretty rich by worldwide standards, and can make a sensible person solidly well off even in North America with a family to support. You guys watch too much OC and The Hills.
I think Khalbrae gets me. I’m not talking about being extremely comfortable here. I’m talking about being in a state of not struggling to survive. No one’s saying 15k will get you those hardwood floors and silk drapes you always wanted, but it’ll still make you a pretty far cry from a street beggar.