Moral/Romantic Conundrum Thread

Apologies in advance to Arac.

So I work at [pizza delivery store], and there’s a girl who works at the Chinese place next door on the weekends. Well, when she’s not hanging out in our store. She’s cute, and I kinda like her, but I can’t tell if she’s flirting with me, or she’s just outgoing. She enjoys stealing my hat (which my previous girlfriend frequently did), and constantly pokes me because I’m ticklish and make funny noises (again, much like my previous girlfriend).

So here’s the problem: she’s 13. Suggestions? (In my defence, I thought she was at least 16. She says other people mistook her for her older sister’s mother.)

Jail bait. Don’t touch that shit, man. >_>

…She’s 13 and you’re 21? Do you really need to think about that?

You’re 21?

Wait, she’s 13 and working? In a restaurant? Isn’t that illegal? I’d check this shit out before going any further.

Not that I’d be against it if you two did hook up (sure, I’d think it’d be odd, but if it works…), but yea. Check it out man.

For one, I am a bit frightened by your state’s lack of child slavery laws! 13? Fug dat shit. You’d be chased after faster than you can say pedophilia. I could understand if you were say, 17 or 18, but…

Just ignore the noises.

Just buy two plane tickets to Japan and you’re set.

Youse a <strike>stupid fucking pedophile</strike> silly demigod, I tells ya

I concurr, back off.

I’m waiting for someone to come in here and say “just tap it” or something. Such timings are always good for a giggle.

ahem >_>

Good point. Really good point <_<

What, that’s she Chinese and thus hot? Or that she’s being forced into slave labor?

No. Her slanted eyes prove Asians are truly crafty aliens.

Or maybe he’s referring to the fact that she’s really greasy from working in such a place, or loves fortune cookies. I love fortune cookies!

I think her family owns the place. She buses tables on Saturday and cashiers at the front counter on Sunday, so it’s not like work work. Funny thing is, she’s in our place so much, she probably knows more than I do.

Since September, although I can probably pass for 17/18.

Well, if you want to go through with this, I’d approach it like any other girl. Just do what you normally do.

But if her parents don’t like it, run.

Ignore the nay-sayers, go for it. (b**)b

I like my women the way i like my whisky. 12 years old, and mixed up with coke. You should too.

Also, i should totally order some pizza from your shop sometime <_<

13? Psh…I wouldn’t want to go out with someone that immature. Blech.

Think about it this way:

When you’re 60, you’ll remember the time you tapped a 13 year old’s ass.

But he’ll then laugh and reach for his granddaughter.

You’d better be sorry, you damn scallavanting (apologies to GAP) hoodlum!
Seriously though, no worries about the age difference unless you’d actually being doing things that age differences make illegal in your state, or her parents disapprove. Even if one of those is true, you can keep it on the downlow.

Although, age difference can make a lot of difference; she is 13, you are 21. You can legally drink. She can’t legally drive. Social stuff like that can be awkward; you probably won’t get along with most of her friends, she’ll probably not get along with a lot of yours. You’re most likely through puberty, she may not have even started it.
But if you want to do, and just have all of that shit in mind, and think whatever it is’d be worth it, go for it. I went with a 19 year old for a month or so when I was 13, and we didn’t really end up having any of those problems, although her friends were kinda patronizing to me, she was chill with all my friends (then again, most people I hang out with are at least a year older than me, but still), and it all worked out just fine.
Just be ready for more problems relating to one another than usual, but if you want to deal with them, go with it.