Essay!

but… I finally got the chance to fill out that test to join the Insitute For Children’s Literature school…

I got a letter last week telling me they have my tets but it would be a good 2-3 weeks before getting any results. I’m nervous as hell… T_T only 32% of the applicants PASS their test… and that’s out of THOUSANDS of people. T_T

No pressure, right? ^^;;

Anyways, there were for parts to the test. The first part was writing short essays in the viewpoints of a child (12 and under) of the topic/ question. The second part was another writing short essay. The third part was fill in the blanks. The forth part was tricky… I had to write a 200-500 word essay over a memorable child hood memory… O.O I can hardly think of any that would interest children!! T_T So… I thought back and thought hard. Finally… I came to remember a scary and silly little adventure of my sister and I.

So, with a little proof reading and help from my friend, Wil… I was able to produce this little sweet essay! Enjoy!

A Walk in the Forest

The sun was hidden behind the gray clouds that evening. My sister and I were bored in our two-story house beside a small creek and a forest. We looked out the kitchen window at the small creek. We pulled on our coats and walked out of the house.

The mud was very slippery. We followed the narrow creek, getting our shoes all muddy. Our eyes went from our feet to the forest of dead trees and prickly bushes ahead of us. I couldn’t help but smile. The excitement was overwhelming! Although, in the back of my mind I knew mommy would be mad at us when we walk our muddy shoes all over her clean floor.

However, we continued our adventure. The creek was getting wider and deeper. My little sister slipped and almost fell in; but I caught her and pulled her back up. After that I walked behind her so that I could catch her if she were to slip again. Large stones in the water helped us across the creek. We jumped on them carefully and got to the other side where the forest awaited our presence.

The trees were huge and twisted like a long raisins. Their branches twitched in the slight breeze and grabbed at each other. Their faces looked at us, staring our little forms down. The bushes were lifeless, yellow and ugly. We felt so tiny compared to these giants before us. My little sister grabbed my hand and held it tightly. We looked at each other and swallowed our fears deep into our stomachs.

Together, we took our first step into the forest.

The bushes reached for our clothing as we walked side by side. We tugged at them, ripping a bush off. Our socks were wet from walking in the mud at the creek. The tree branches reached for our shoulders and hair but we shook them off as well. The dead grass beneath us stuck to our pants and dragged along behind us. We refused to let these obstacles scare us.

Before we knew it, the trees and bushes stopped reaching for us. It became calm in the forest as we wandered around. Our hands locked together; our eyes looked at everything that moved. The birds hovered over us in the trees, cawing softly. All sounds stopped, however, when we stopped walking. Our eyes circled around, looking for anything other than the trees and the birds.

From behind us, a heavy step snapped a twig loudly. We froze; our hearts jumped into our throats. Another step sounded, followed by a movement in the bushes. We looked at the bushes, finding them moving without the wind blowing. Without waiting, my sister and I screamed loudly and spun back around. We ran through the reaching trees and bushes.

Together, we ran to the house. Mother saw us coming and shook her head.

“Walking in the forest… again?” She said when we stopped before her.

double post:

It would be nice for at least ONE comment… T_T

It makes me feel as though I’ll do HORRIBLE on this…

Chris-chris chris…

Just a quick comment about your concern on the 4th part - a memorable childhood memory does not necessarily have to cater to the interest of children. It should be what <i>you</i> found interesting in your childhood, whether it be a favourite stuffed animal, a visit to a theme park, a rock you found interesting, whatever. I think the purpose of the last section would be to see how well you can narrate your own experiences and perhaps tie it in with your literary work, not how to modify ways of telling your memories to cater to the attention spans of children.

Regarding your essay - I think it is a bit too neat, concise, and descriptive. Of course, no one there exactly expects the next Dr. Seuss, but I would think that children would be a bit more irrational and imaginative than inferred from your style of narration.

Anything’s better than nothing really. The advise and crit does help.

I think kids would probably be attracted to simpler terms, but it’s only natural that you’d do something more detailed and refined, given the quality of your previous works. It’s not a matter of quality or competence, but rather being able to change the perspective. Of course if you’re feeling evil, you could always get little kids to read your Twisted Love stories… Mwahahaha!

You’re story’s fine in terms of grammar, style, description, depth - but how good some of these things (esp. style and grammar) kind of bother me. Like, considering that they specifically asked for a story from the point of view of a child <12 year old, perhaps they were looking for more than good content?

I dunno, maybe I’m reading too much into this. I’ll try to find some short stories written from the <i>innocent eye</i> POV of a child and show you what I mean.

I wasn’t exactly an innocent eye when I was younger. >.> The first three parts (I think) they did ask for a child’s point of view but this last section they didn’t mention any of the sort…

Besides that… I didn’t have much of a “good” or “bad” childhood. >.> Fighting with my brother and yelling at my mom was more or less what it was like. Which is why I was told I wasn’t much of a child back then.

When CC asked for my help I thought it was for a story contest, not a story that required a child’s point of view. However, if taken as a story where a an older person is REMEMBERING what happened when she was 12, it works pretty well. Such an essay would not require childish dialogue. And many kids do find this kind of scary-but-safe story enjoyable. I think they can relate.

<i>Innocent eye</i> refers to the style of narration employed when writing from the point of view of a child - it’s a literary technique and a very specific subdivision of the <i>first person limited</i> POV narration, not really a reflection on how innocent the narrator is, which can vary.

I dunno, I think your essay’s pretty good in terms of acuity of the descriptions and imagery, but the conclusion doesn’t strike me as particularly strong. Then again, it’s an essay and not a short story, so I don’t think it matters.

It’s alright Wil. hug

And thanks for the very little comments but the good Critic.

I got the results today.

So, what did they think?

I passed. ^^

Congratulations. Enjoy your fruits of success, and provide us with more reads later on.

thanks Maba… hug

hopefully everyone will be up to commenting by then.

>.>

But I’ll keep everyone posted if they still like to know ^^

Yeah, congrats!

Congratulations, CC!! :biggrin:

So, what next? Do you get to join the Institute? Or is there a waiting list?

I get to join. It’s a course for one year or something and I work with a personal instructor… one-on-one.

Not too sure about the details yet. ^^ But, yay!

And Wil, I sent you an email… did you not get it? T_T

Of course we’ll want to see more of your stuff. And congratulations!

You mean you sent me another Email? I haven’t received it yet, CC. Try sending it again.

I don’t know… I’ve seen their advertisements. It looks like a scam to me, honestly. I wouldn’t plunk down your money until you contacted the Better Business Bureau or checked up on them, at the very least.