Dreams of Shadow

All the horrible things boredom makes you do. I figured I might as well post some scribbles I started writing on years ago called Dreams of Shadow.

It’s not a fanfiction I suppose, but I believe this is where it is supposed to go.

Marvel at my tremendous skill, or don’t. And try to choke the laughter.

I ask that you ignore any grammatical and ortographic errors, I have already been made aware of them. It was written before I really knew English anyway.

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Dreams of Shadow

500 years ago, the home planet of the Cortoz Emperium.

A young boy, around 5 years looked towards the sky, with his completely black eyes. I want to go up there one day he thought. His name was R’ojiii, most people, including his friends called him a hopeless dreamer.

“Hey look, it’s the R’ojiii. Still going around dreaming about things you can never have?” W’rang stuck his tongue out at R’ojiii. R’ojiii looked back “I don’t dream hopeless dreams!!” He yelled, and stuck his tongue back at W’rang. W’rang grinned, “Their as hopeless as we getting into space!”. “Their not!!” R’ojiii, could feel the anger growing inside him for every word W’rang said. W’rang laughed… “Of course, and I will one day be on a starship”. “Shut up!!” R’ojiii yelled.
“What if I don’t?” W’rang laughed a bit… “I’ll show you” R’ojiii growled, and picked up a rock… “I’ll kill you” he said. W’rang swallowed “Um, I think can hear my mom yelling” he turned around and ran away. “COWARD!!!” R’ojiii spitted after him. He laughed his favorite laughter, and then went to his secret place.

R’ojiii pushed the curtains away from the doorway to the old abandoned house. And went over to the old dusty mattress, which had been abandoned along with the house. “My dreams ain’t hopeless!” he mumbled to himself… laid back, and after a while fell asleep, dreaming.

His dream went like they usually did. One day he went onto a starship in charge of hoards of people, that he would become a great leader… “I am R’ojiii, your leader, the ruler of…” his dreams always ended there…

R’ojiii sat up, a bit disappointed, would he never get to dream to the end. He looked around for what had woken him up, and ended up looking right at W’rang and a few of his “friends”. “How did you find me?!” said R’ojiii not taking his eyes of W’rang. “One of my friends, know you come here” W’rang grinned over at a quite skinny, and dusty boy. “YOU…!!“ R’ojiii, got a knife from under the mattress and lounged it at the boy… “I’m going to kill you” he yelled… while W’rang and the others just looked shocked at what was happening. R’ojiii picked up the boy, took back his knife, and pushed him out of the door, then turned towards the others “GET OUT!!!”. W’rang looked startled, this wasn’t what he had planned would happen, and slowly backed out of the place along with the others. R’ojiii looked at the knife, realizing what he just had done, he threw it away… and dropped down on the mattress, sobbing.

Hours later he woke up, sweating, he had dreamt the weirdest dream. Blood, on blood… he could remember vision a entire river, pouring into a small pond. A ever growing pond, soon it turned to a lake, and a small sea, and finally a ocean. It never seemed to stop he thought to himself. He also remembers entire hoards of people, but they were all different from himself, his friends, all he ever seen. He couldn’t get that dream out of his thoughts at the first, so he went out, where it had started to rain…He went through the street, towards the place he called home, at least for now he thought.

He went in through the door, ignored his moms welcome home, and went up and into his room. He quickly dropped down on the bed, got out the secret notebook he had under the pillow. And started writing, small delicate letters he himself had invented. Every single word, every single memory, he could of the dream. He called the book, the dream book. R’ojiii grinned to himself. He looked at the old clock, he had got from his cousin before he disappeared, it was already 11 pm. He felt quite tired, despite of the nap a bit earlier. So he went over to the corner, where his bed stood.

R’ojiii turned in bed as his dreams started, like they always do around 1 am. Their always about the same, leadership, blood, and something or someone… he really never understood.

A old man appeared in his dream, bent and gray haired with a long beard. “I have come to claim what is mine” He said. “And you shall have it T’rech” R’ojiii jumped from the highchair and swung a blade into the old man’s forehead, then he left letting the old man die in pain.

R’ojiii sat up in bed sweating, what was it with him, all his dreams was about blood, and stuff like that. He decided not to write this one down in his book, it just seemed way too real. He had felt like he knew the old man somehow, though he had never seen him, he thought.

The clock made sound to tell it was 6 am… R’ojiii gazed, and thought “It can’t be 6 am already, I’m way to tired”. He realized that it wasn’t just the clock when his mom yelled that it was time to get up. R’ojiii confused got into some clothes, and ran downstairs. Right out through the door without telling anyone, he used to do that. R’ojiii’s mom looked after him “He never listens, and I guess he never will” she thought.

R’ojiii went up the loads of stairs, made from the mountain itself, to the old abandoned house. He got angry as he saw a shadow move in there “GET OUT!!!.. this is my place!!” R’ojiii’s voice echoed into the room. He could hear a voice in return “B–but, can’t we be friends?”. R’ojiii thought for a little while “Ok… who are you?” The little boy from earlier came into the light “My name is K’Tackh, son of R’tard”. “Good, I am R’ojiii, son of O’lar” R’ojiii was proud of his name, so he stood up in all his height when he said it.

R’ojiii and K’Tackh became good friends, together they kept the abandoned house a secret. And hindered W’rang and his “friends” in bothering them… until one day a old man stepped into the building. “I seek R’ojiii Redun” he said. R’ojiii knew that word, it was a name out of a old tale… Redun he who’s dreams tell a true future, he shrugged at the though. The old man looked at R’ojiii “I suspect you are him, the truth dreamer?” his voice was deep, and something about it seemed evil. R’ojiii looked up at the old man “Yes I’m R’ojiii, but what do you mean with truth dreamer?” “What the words say, exactly what they say. You dreams tell a truth, and I shall help them become one, R’ojiii Redun”

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It ends there: An unfinished tale, like most of my scribbles. I suppose I should get around to writing more on it, and rewriting it for that matter. It’s original context is long gone anyway.

You’re still reading? It is finally proven then: The people here are bloody mad. Good thing that madness is the first step to becoming a genious.

I liked tripple periods way too much back then, dialogue too.

There was an intro once, there still is actually but I cut it from this pasting. Was meant to set it into the now outdated and dead context. And to have an excuse to rant more.

And to actually see if anyone have bothered to read this far.

Evil is good. Good is evil. Nothing is like it really seem.

Don’t mind me, I’m carried away on a stream of typing. And I suppose I’m trying to max the post lenght. There’s only slightly more than fourty thousand characters to go you know.

Bloody mad and proud of it.

It is rather sinister, all the blood and violence.
Some of the elipses could’ve just been left out and you could have added some physical space between the dialouge to make it less visually rapid.

Quite an interesting piece, love the names for one. There were some details that can use some furnishing:

A young boy, around 5 years looked towards the sky, with his completely black eyes. I want to go up there one day he thought. His name was R’ojiii, most people, including his friends called him a hopeless dreamer.

>When somebody’s thinking, but something like a ’ on each side of the thought to make it easier to follow, or make it in italics. The reader gets confused when it’s not revealed until later that the last few words weren’t part of the text.

“Hey look, it’s the R’ojiii. Still going around dreaming about things you can never have?” W’rang stuck his tongue out at R’ojiii. R’ojiii looked back “I don’t dream hopeless dreams!!” He yelled, and stuck his tongue back at W’rang. W’rang grinned, “Their as hopeless as we getting into space!”.

>Here you’re repeating the names a lot. Can you exchange some of them for short descriptions such as “the younger boy” etc? It gets a bit repetetive. Also, I’d recommend that you make a line break or new paragraph whenever somebody speaks, it get less clogged and easier to read.

Those are some of the many things I would change upon a rewriting.

It was written in my sinister period, which I’m still in. Happy stories creates too much of a contrast with reality.

Very nice/twisted.

It’s kinda creepy, though. When I get wrapped up in my imagination, I tend to be hostile towards people, too. Not bloody fucking KNIFE mutha fucka DIE-type, but hostile in general.

Yeah, it’d be cool to see you continue on with this story sometime.