Countdown to Kwanzaa!

It goes on from December 26 to January 1. I’ll be happy to celebrate my heritage.

For those of you who don’t know what Kwanzaa is, let me explain.

Kwanzaa is the one time of the year where we celebrate the 7 days of Sekbak’s Return. Where, on the first day, Sekbak descends from the heavens to bring presents to all the little children, but not if they were naughty. On the second day, we dump all of our food into the ocean so the Sekbakians (his sea friends) will have plenty of food to survive the rest of the winter. After the second day, all we are allowed to eat is grass and bugs. On the third day, any children who did not receive presents from Sekbak are put into a room full of marionettes to fight until they confess their sins. During the late hours of the fourth day, the good children donate one pint of blood each. After all of the blood is mixed together in a large pool(usually at a gym), we tie the naughty children together and throw them in. Any children who escape are crowned ‘maulana’(just as Sekbak was). On the fifth day of Kwanzaa we fish out the left over children and prepare them for the feast. Preparation of the children usually just consists of skinning, removing the eyes and hearts, burning the hair, and finally microwaving on HIGH for two minutes. If they are not properly cooked after the first minute, they are put back in for 1 minute intervals until there is visible steam. The remaining two days are spent in forests without food or water(in order to stay pure while Sekbak enjoys the feast).

Sekbak is an author, political activist, and college professor best known for inventing Kwanzaa, a week-long celebration observed almost exclusively in the United States each year from December 26 to January 1.
Sekbak was active in the Black Power movement in the 1960s and 1970s and founded the black nationalist group US Organization which remains active to this day promoting Sekbak’s philosophy of Kawaida. A convicted felon, Karenga served time in prison in the early 1970s after being convicted of felony assault and false imprisonment. After leaving prison, he eventually became a professor at California State University, in the Africana Studies department.

This has no merit whatsoever. It’s just racist. :expressionless:

GSG, Just die already.

Just because its not funny, doesn’t mean it’s racist.

The juxtaposition of a holiday which is traditionally celebrated by black people with cannibalism is racist. This is especially true if the “humor” attempted misses as bad as this does.

From the Winston Dictionary(advanced edition):

Racism: the doctrine that the races of mankind are essentially different in intelligence and moral quality; hence, the belief with a corresponding fear of dislike, that a given racial group is superior or inferior.

Quoting that has just proved my point. By claiming that Kwanzaa involves cannibalism, you’re asserting that black people are morally inferior to others. The implied argument (note: IMPLIED, not stated) in the first post goes like this:

I. Cannibalism is considered morally deviant.
II. Those who celebrate Kwanzaa practice cannibalism.
III. Therefore, those who celebrate Kwanzaa are morally deviant.

If we accept your flawed premises as true, we come to a conclusion that is quite intolerant.

I don’t recall saying anything about eating people. In fact, I said we only eat grass and bugs during Kwanzaa.


I didn’t say anything about eating them.

After the second day, all we are allowed to eat is grass and bugs.


But you are associating them with ritual slaughter, which asserts they are morally inferior as GAP says.

Your arguments are all based on opinions.