Booya Sucka!

peeps head in Hi. waves Dang, things have changed some since the crash. Oh well.

Writing a new story, gonna be a shortie, prob. six-ten pages per issue/episode. New series I’m working on that centers around the FF VII world. When evil has returned, who’s there to fight it off? Booya Sucka, is who!

Comedy, guys. Something very dear to my heart and what I watch all the time (you prob. couldn’t tell with all the mad crazy depressing stories that I write) but something very foreign to me when it comes to writing it. This one ain’t complete yet, but I just wanted some feedback first before I continued to see if this is at least a slightly enjoyable read, while at the same time… funny. Talk to me, people, and enjoy!.. what I have anyway.

Booya Sucka! : The Stranger

[i]Though their names remain etched within each and everyone’s mind; Cloud, Tifa, Barret, Vincent, Yuffie, Cait Sith, Cid, and the great evil that was thwarted by them, evil still rears it’s ugly head now and then, like that annoying guy by that always wants to talk to you about pointless topics. It tries it’s best to cause trouble that is thought to be long gone. That is why I am here. Why I have come to restore peace to this disturbed land.

My name? BS.[/i]

“Hurry up, Muffy! The party’s going to start in a half-hour!” a middle-aged woman, blonde hair trying to fight back the gray streaks age wishes to bestow on her, yelled from her little bathroom next to their bedroom.

“Well, darling, I would simply love to move along in this process here, but I’m having quiet the trouble figuring out what to wear.” Muffy said, walking into the bathroom. “What do you think, Buffy? You think this works?” he asked, gesturing to his person.

She stopped combing her hair for a moment and looked at him and scanned the clothing choices. Making odd expressions, contourting her face, she said, “Well, I like the tie. And I like the pants and I love the shirt. But just not together, dear.”

Grumbling for a moment, looking down at himself, he asked, “Well, then, what should I do to change this look into something we can both enjoy?”

“Change that tie and the pants. The blue set. You’ll be fine, darling.”

“Very well,” he concluded and walked back to the bedroom.

Buffy commenced combing her hair. She smiled after a while, glowing at the image placed out before her. “I do look stunning, don’t I?” she spoke to no one in general.

“Who are you talking to, darling?” Muffy yelled out from within his closet.

“No one, dear. Just flattering myself. A little, self motivation.”

“Mmm, yes.” his muffled voice said in return. Walking back into the bathroom, he asked, “Are you wearing that thing again? That black dress simply does nothing for your exquisite features, dear.”

“Well, you know what they say, Muffy.” Buffy replied. “Once you go black, you never go back.”

“Goodness sakes alive, will you ever cease using such tired phrases?”

“Well, darling, you’ve got to stay with what works. Stays with what works.” she smiled at herself in the mirror.

“Mmm, yes.” his voice drifted as he walked out the room.

Several moments later, the two were out the door, on their way to the big bash where only the rich were able to congregate. Starting the engine up on their laviously, luxuriously lush automobile, Muffy asked, “Did you ensure the diamond was securely placed in the room with the semi-automatics ready to fire at anyone who happens to venture within?”

“You mean, the alarm, dear?” Buffy returned a question.

“Yes, yes, you know what I mean.”

“Of course I did.” he replied. Driving out from their establishment, he finished, “How careless do you imagine me to be?”

Meanwhile, inside the manor, a button simply labeled “Off” which was opposite of “On” was pushed, and the security system was quietly shut-down.

“Oh, good heavens alive!” Buffy cried in horror. “My beautiful, $62,400.45 diamond has been stolen from me!” She commenced in the sobbing once more and burried her head in her hands.

Walking up behind her, Muffy peered into the room his wife, at the doorway, had fallen to her knees in surprise and agitation. Noting the scene before her, he shook his head. “Wow. Evil has penetrated even our expensive and therefore best mansion in the whole town. If it can happen to us, my dear, I’m sure for a certain now that it can happen anywhere.”

Buffy, though, was too shocked still to do anything but continue her insessent crying.

“And they left not a clue as to where we can find them.” Muffy continued, as he picked up a slip of folded paper that simply said on the outside, “Not A Clue”. Inside the paper was blank. “Well, this is just plain rude.”

“Is there anyone that can restore peace to this downhearted person!??” Buffy asked out loud, tears still streaming down her face.

At that exact moment, as if saying this were his cue, a masked man, a BS symbol adorning his forehead, with tight black spandex covering his whole person, yellow streaks highlighting the most of him, crashed violently through one of the windows in the room and rolled on the floor. Hopping up quickly, shrugging off any glass debris, he placed his hands on his hips and stated, “I am!” A gust of wind flew behind his words, and flapped his cape some.

Oookay :slight_smile: That was mildly hilarious, Bookbag :slight_smile:

“Not a Clue” :o Loved that one… hope you’ll continue this :slight_smile:

Not much added, but still. Comments please? Not spelled checked, either. ;p

“Good gracious, young man! What are you, some sort of hero?” Muffy asked the caped, masked villigante.

“Why, that question can be answered with the utmost assured response of YES!!” he replied, forcefully.

Buffy looked up at him, tears still streaking from her eyes, and then observed the mess of glass that lay behind him. “You broke our window!!” she bellowed, and then resumed her crying.

“Fret not, dear lady. For it is I, the one who will avenge your savaged, ravaged, blood lossed heart!”

She looked up at him again, and confusingly asked, “What does that mean?”

Muffy ignored her question, and asked him, “But, what I want to know is just what those two initals stand for? BS? Uhh, would it Beast Slave?”

“No, good sir!” his deep voice responded, a hint of laughter flowing through.

“Beautions Special?”

“Well, that would just be short of silly, sir!”

“Barking Stupid?”

“Now your just making things up!”

“Ohh! Bullsh-”

“No, no, no, no!!” he quickly interupted him. “I am a family friendly superhero!”

“I had the window specially flown in from (winter town). How ever am I going to receive a replacement?” Buffy pondered, tears finally slowing their decent down her face.

“Well, what IS your name then, young man?”

“My name, is Booya Sucka!” Booya proudly proclaimed, a gust of wind blowing his cape after he finished announcing it. “And I have come to rid this world from any and all evil!”

“Uh-huh. Well, that’s all well and good, but I don’t really see the need for the costume.” mUffy started. "I mean, it’s just a pretencious little garment meant to try and hide your true inner thoughts and emotions from people, something I certainly don’t want in some kind of “superhero”. Muffy finished, making little quotes with his fingers. “And anyway, what actually MAKES you a super hero anyway?”

“Well, fellow doubter, when I proclaim the words, Booya Sucka!” and then a gust of wind began to blow his cape some, “I gather on super HUMAN strength, able to knock any foe out with one solid punch!”

“And then you have my friends, who simply will not understand how we allowed such a unruly fellow like you to walk away scotch free.” Buffy muttered along, still remaining on the topic of the broken window. “And my mother, oh Muffy, my mother! What will she think?”

“I think your lying, good sir, I don’t think you have any such power.” Muffy stated to him.

“But I do! And I can prove it to you!” Booya said, and walked up to Buffy.

“Oh my, and then I simply must have to find out about the framer and see if he can arrange a time to come over and examine this catastrophe.” Buffy was still saying when she stopped and looked up at Booya who towered over her.

Shouting loudly, “Booya Sucka!” he pulled his arm back and then let his fist sail into her face. As soon as it made contact, she completely blanked out and toppled over, unconcious.

Examing his wife, he looked at Booya and said, “Well, looks like I’ve been made the dill in this pickle jar.” he stated, smiling approvingly. “Well, off you go now, to retrieve the stolen goods that’s been abducted from us and to go and do harm to his person. Go on, go, go.” he softly coached, pushing his hands away approvingly.

“Yes sir!” Booya said, and jumped out the window, his cape knocking away some shards of glass as he did so.

Crouching next to his unconcious better half, Muffy muttered, “Very good work already, masked defender. Very good, indeed.”

LMAO, it’s hilarious, Bookbag :slight_smile:

PLEASE continue!

I’m chuckling. And it’s a good read.

Excellent name, by the way. Booya Sucka. And not just for the hilarious running gag that his initials [have and will continue to] provide.

One question, though:

(Winter Town)

I figure you’re looking for someone to give you the name of the wintry town in FF7?

I think the town is called Icicle (it’s labelled “Icicle Inn” on the map in the FF7 brady games walkthrough I bought and never use because I never play FF7…)

But anyway, yeah, good stuff, CONTINUE!!!

Oh! Very nice! Least I know that it gets some laughs. Especially from the original “Parallel Universe” master! (That’s you Kaiser). Anyway, will continue this and finish it soon, folks!

I’ve been waiting for more comedy from you ever since “Compulsory Duty” so…

And by the way, I don’t often read FF7 stuff, but I’m reading this, so. That should tell ya something… :wink: