ATF Rids University of Georgia of Ninja Threat

Now, I’m sure you college students know about campus newspapers. They’re generally not the best source of news around. I know people at UGA read it only to read up on university news and do the crossword during hyooj lecture courses. Well, today’s Red and Black (UGA’s paper) had a front page article that caught EVERYONE’S attention.

Read up.

And as a side note, the back page of todays Red and Black had an article on a featured twirler, Hope Carrell, who’s some internationally renowned baton twirler and the fiance of a friend of mine. But yeah. Ninjas.

The pirates win again yarrrr.

But they didn’t get the pirates apprehended?

Disapointment runs on my face.

That kid is a moron if he thinks the ATF guys reacted inappropriately.

He was sneaking around in the dark, peeking around corners, wearing dark clothes and bandanas over his face. How much more suspicious can you be?

It was in the middle of the day during classes. Like a hundred people saw it happen. >.>

Yes, against a fake. Fweh!

Security is getting out of control… >.>

This will now go on Bush’s list of terrorist attacks that he’s thwarted. Wait for it. It’ll show up on Fox’s talking points within weeks. “Amongst attacks that we’ve stopped would be the dreaded Ninja attack on the University of Georgia campus we’ve all been dreading since 9/11.”

The guy was lucky he wasn’t disguised as a Muslim or something like that. >.>

Yes. The fake ninja got arrested. While the real pirates continue downloading software and music illegally.

Campus Police should have known about the event this kid was participating in and as such should have stood up for the student against the ATF.

UGA’s campus police aren’t much better. They had to call in the bomb squad to blow up a suspicious package left in a Red and Black dispenser sometime late last semester. It was a box of muffins.

First a muffin bomb, then ninjas. Sounds like a dangerous place.

Luckily our frats can keep the raccoons at bay by hitting them with traffic cones.

Edit: The Muffin Bomb

It’s his fault for going outside. If he was safely inside reading the bible and watching fox news, no harm would have come to him. How can you even think of blaming the ATF? You know they could strike at any time. It could be anyone. Even you.

I lol’ed.

Update!

Well, I wrote a letter to the Red and Black. Saturn can even attest to that. I opened it up to the Opinions page this morning, and BAM, there’s my letter. So I thought I’d share it with y’all. Clicky

Also, there’s a follow through telling the ninja’s side of the story. Not quite as funny

Ninjas may seem more threatening, but if allowed, pirates will pillage the University and make off with our booty.

LMAO!

Not our booty!

Mmmm… booty. I mean, huh?

University Police Chief Jimmy Williamson said he was unhappy with how the situation was handled, but later had a “constructive talk” with an ATF supervisor.
Ooh, a Constructive Talk, hmm? In general, though, this sounds more like Douglass Adams’ definition of a “learning experience.”

Id sue ATF good for that. Police Brutality, improper procedures, lax agents. Then again, for campus police being there, and the event being a proper event, why didnt tehy handle it, and call them off. Id sue them too.