Well, at least bored people could find a good adventure once in a while… Maybe I need to find something exciting to do.
Go on an adventure…
Even if it is in your neighborhood.
There is adventure everywhere.
I went through that hollow apathy a few years ago - and my indifference remains. I don’t feel hollow, but I really don’t care about a lot of things, and I personally think it made me a better person.
You’re depressed, it seems to me that you’re also a bit lovesick too, go ask out those girls that make you warm when you think about them.
One is everything to me. The other is like a little sister. The others are sweet friends.
I think we all go through depression, mine involved no apathy but a paralyzing fear of death. I couldn’t sleep at night, but funny as it might sound muttering “Our Father who art in heaven…” helped me move my mind to other things, despite me not being very religious.
But what you should do is seeing a shrink, Manus. Is there one at your school? At least they don’t cost anything, right? And they are there to help after all.
I’m afraid they may not understand what’s happening to me. This problem has deep roots and it’s hard to explain. It’s a mix of extreme feelings of opposite natures (which almost tore me apart), disappointment, loneliness, lack of understanding, self-loathing, a deep sadness and a dream that gives me strangth but makes me suffer.
Yes, it does seem like depression to me. It is not a strange phenomenon, either; it is all too common.
I know that approaching these persons for whom you feel affection is no easy task (I myself have great difficulty doing it), but it is often best to seize the day at times like this. If you do not, they may lose interest and you may feel worse then than you do now. Act whilst you have the opportunity. If the person for whom you care deeply rejects you, then you will know that they are not for you and you can concentrate on seeking your true soul-mate. I have learnt that procrastination seldom yields fruit the hard way.
Otherwise, I suggest soul-searching, as Sinistral suggested. That is how I found myself and how I become more confident than I used to be when I was your age.
There is another problem… Those people I care for are beyond my reach for the time being… I may not be able to see them for months or years. I have yet to see them in person. I know how that special someone feels, but… I can’t get there yet.
Originally posted by Manus Dei
There is another problem… Those people I care for are beyond my reach for the time being… I may not be able to see them for months or years. I have yet to see them in person. I know how that special someone feels, but… I can’t get there yet.
Why can you not see them?
The physical distance is very large. Different countries. Getting there can be a problem for now.
You are from Portugal, correct? Where do the individuals in question live?
Well, so much for utmost secrecy…
My prime target is in the UK (THE ONE!), but the others are in the US and Canada (the good friends I’d like to see)…
And before you ask, I met them on the boards…
sigh Secret identities aren’t what they used to be…
Considering that I can read and write Latin, I can understand Portuguese fairly well, and I saw discussion about where you were from in languages forum, in the Portuguese thread.
I am quite sure now that I know upon whom you have your eye, but since you should probably like that detail to remain a secret, I will not reveal it.
Just be careful in getting involved with long-distance relationships; they are not easily managed.
Hmmm… So you think you may know… Well, PM me. I wonder if your guess is close.
As for the others, they are also very interesting and kind people, and I’d be delighted to visit them and get to know them better. I have a few soft spots for them.
As for my prime goal… I can’t wait to start that journey! She is everything to me!
If that’s your problem, the best way to beat it is to just get over it. Shit like that happens a lot in life, and brooding does no good.
You have no idea how I doubted this would ever happen. It’ ironic how things happen.
I feel like that every day, Manus. Take large amounts of vicodin. Thats what I do.
I never thought a girl would actually care for me… And now I can’t even see her. Damn this misfortune!
Since that has nothing to do with my post, why didnt you just edit your last post? Thats one of the reasons people are pissed of at you. You seem to care about post counts which mean nothing.